Coming Out

[ltronven]

I have know that I am gender dysphoric for a while and I need a way to come out to my parents in a way that won't shock them or make things awkward between us. I am fairly concerned about their reaction and don't want to make a big thing of it... any help is completely welcomed, thanks!

[Rachel]

It would help to know your age and a bit about your parents acceptance toward LGBT issues.

Seeing a gender therapist is always a good first step.

[ltronven]

I am 15, live in England, and my parents have varying acceptances - they make a lot of crude jokes but I believe that they wouldn't disown me if I told them. As to homosexuality, bisexuality, etc. they are fine but don't understand it and often - again - make jokes but never with or around LGBT members (purposefully). As to gender I have very little idea as to their acceptance besides that they wouldn't kick me out.

[Rachel]

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[Rachel]

Well first off congratulations on trying to do something about your dysphoria, that takes courage.

Is there a school guidance counselor you could talk to? I really think a gender therapist would help you and your parents sort out how you feel and the next  steps to take. Perhaps if there is a school guidance counselor your could start with them and proceed from there.

[Laura_7]

Here are a few resources that might help:

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,197523.msg1756901.html#msg1756901

http://hawaii.edu/hivandaids/Some_Considerations_in_Coming_Out_Trans_to_Your_Parents_and_Family.pdf

one strategy could be to explain your feelings, show some materials and tell them you want to see a good gender therapist...
the gender therapist to help you along, maybe with easy reversible steps first, to help you find out how they make you feel...
so that you have someone to guide you and help you along, and no rash but appropriate steps are made.... appropriate also in your favour, so that it moves along...

Being in the UK you might contact the mermaids, its a group specifically for transgender youth:
http://mermaidsuk.org.uk
"We offer information, support, friendship and shared experiences."

They can be contacted via mail...
you could ask there for more information and support.

And this thread migh also be of interest for you:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,195129.msg1773970.html#msg1773970


hugs

[Mariah]

I know for me when it came to telling people I shared things that I know they had noticed to help them understand. It might help if you can give some frame of reference they can grasp and understand. Secondly, you might want educate them as you try to explain bout yourself. Hugs
Mariah