Quote from: T.K.G.W. on November 26, 2015, 04:05:57 PM
I don't care either way about the holidays, I live so far away from family and most friends right now visiting or being dragged into things with anyone would be impossible, and I really got into the 'quiet Christmas' thing. Not making a big deal, just having a nice quiet pleasant day with me and my best bud, not feeling the pressure to have a "great time" and then dealing with the alcoholic fallout from dozens of relatives who are obviously not having a great time and don't get on with each other anyway and decide to drink themselves into a stupor.
But I do dislike the Christmas hype and its effect on people. I think it makes most people depressed - this image of a perfect family celebration or this amazing day we get shown in the media or in films doesn't seem to exist in my experience, and almost everyone I know secretly hates Christmas because its a massive build up to some kind of anti-climax for them. People put so much effort and expectation in and the reality never quite seems to meet the fairytale image. Maybe that's why I don't mind it so much, because I just don't get hyped up and I keep it low-key. It's pretty much just another day for me, but one where I know I can chill out, watch a movie or two, grab a drink and relax. I'm not even a Christian but one time when I was alone on a trip I went to a midnight mass in a church just to see what it was like. I would much rather do that than all that eating and gifting and getting ->-bleeped-<-faced drunk that my family used to do. That's what it's supposed to be about anyway, right...?
It seems like everyone I know including my own immediate family "hate" Christmas for their own reasons. My mother hates it because her mother died close to it. So she always gets depressed every Christmas which then kinda ruined most of our holidays as kids. The fact I enjoy it like a grumpy old dude now is probably because it was always super charged with tension and anger around relatives... at least now I live away from that it's lost most of its unpleasant aspects.
Dude, nearly a mirror image of how I feel about it. That's probably the main reason I cannot stand the stuff; family. I mean, people, especially in the media, make this stuff seem so mandatory, special, important and all perfect. I wonder if such a family even exists. I remember how as a teen, living with my mom who at the time loved family get-togethers like this, would force me and my cis bro along with her. We hated every moment of it, but for some reason I felt like he could deal with it much better than I could for obvious reasons. We were called more names by our family than by most strangers on the street. Seriously....
Even now, at age 26, about 10 years later, I am still carrying the hurt from their verbal punching and kicking. It won't be until I receive sincere apologies from each and every one of them that I forgive. Until that happens
(and it probably won't) I will take my grudges along with me to the grave when its my time.
I am even sick of my cis bro, who seemed to be at least a little supportive. You know what he told me today? He said he was too busy, even on a holiday like this, to text me. I can get him saying that on a regular day. And he does, constantly. But today...of all days? Really? Imma cut em all off. Only family I wish hard to see is my mama. But one day, she ain't even gonna remember who I am anymore from dementia induced by a lifetime of alcoholism.
Regardless of all this, like you, I find the "simple good" in these sorta days. Yeah, I slept all day in bed. Most people probably think that is the most depressing thing in the world. But, man, you know what I'd say to that? 'Least I gotta bed to even sleep in, unlike homeless people who have to sleep on the cold, hard concrete floors underneath highways. And my family and other families are prolly out there right now just havin' themselves a ball of a time without considering such things even once. Its all good anyhow. Cause they lives don't mean a thing to me. My family's that is.
I just woke up from a 3 to 4 hour nap. And might turn around and go right to bed. Only grub I got all day was a bowl of oatmeal and a can of soup. I would have at least baked some chicken for some chicken fajita if it hadn't spoiled thanks to my dad not ever allowing me to cook while he is away....
I suppose its alot of bad and at least some good to this holiday charade.
