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ugh.. i dont look like anything right now other then sick

Started by archlord, November 25, 2015, 05:55:41 PM

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archlord

I reached a new stage since a week and when i look at myself in the mirror i dont recognize me. HRT is being very strong with me since the begining ( i am lucky) but how am i supposed to deal with this.. i used to be a very good looking man and now i feel like HRT is destroying every bit of my male appearance( this is what i want) but for now i just look like a femme boy.  I have ultra soft skin, pink color on my cheeks just like if i had permanent blush , trimmed brows, bigger lips, my hips have gained 1.5 inch in size in a month but when i look at me in the mirror i just see a man that look like if he is about to die from a sickness.

How am i supposed to deal with people asking me if i am allright  ? I got asked by 5 different person this week.  My parents told me that they have difficulty to look at me because they see me changing. My mom told me that i look like if i had cancer.

Ive just been hired at a new job and i feel like i should come out to everyone and go full time allready.. i will still look sick but atleast in my correct gender.

Sorry i feel bad
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saraht123

Hi Archlord,

I haven't started HRT yet, but some others told me they got a lot of people asking 'Are you ok?' in a concerned sort of way. Or 'You're looking very pale lately'.

So, I guess you're right on track, I mean as long as you feel ok. Anyway sounds like you are doing really well, from what you've said.
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FluffyPunk

Hey Archlord, take it easy on yerself love. Were gonna go through mani wonderful an goonie lookin  changes. Do yer best to Enjoy na ride both good an bad. Sometymes when were down, we learn important things of arselves an that's a major part of ar Evolution. Big hugs Sis, Remember, theres always Rocky Road. :)
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Harley Quinn

Might try spray tan if it's your complexion that you're hung up on... it won't show like make up and may solve your issue. There's always a trick to making daily life easier. :)
At what point did my life go Looney Tunes? How did it happen? Who's to blame?... Batman, that's who. Batman! It's always been Batman! Ruining my life, spoiling my fun! >:-)
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archlord

Quote from: Harley Quinn on November 25, 2015, 06:30:57 PM
Might try spray tan if it's your complexion that you're hung up on... it won't show like make up and may solve your issue. There's always a trick to making daily life easier. :)

Yeah i might try this or go back to tanning bed.  My skin is so pale

Quote from: saraht123 on November 25, 2015, 06:10:29 PM
I haven't started HRT yet, but some others told me they got a lot of people asking 'Are you ok?' in a concerned sort of way. Or 'You're looking very pale lately'.

Sometimes i feel like it would be easier if everyone knew.  I wouldnt have to lie about my condition.  It is even more annoying when you walk by someone and this person have  a weird look or a smile at you. 



Quote from: FluffyPunk on November 25, 2015, 06:23:24 PM
Hey Archlord, take it easy on yerself love. Were gonna go through mani wonderful an goonie lookin  changes. Do yer best to Enjoy na ride both good an bad. Sometymes when were down, we learn important things of arselves an that's a major part of ar Evolution. Big hugs Sis, Remember, theres always Rocky Road. :)

Yeah far from being done with transition and i know the best is to come.. however right now i look like ->-bleeped-<-.  I still can pull the boy mode but i look terrible. I honestly look better in girl mode
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saraht123

No, don't go tanning, especially if your skin is pale!!!

Get a fake bake instead.
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Harley Quinn

Multi Vitamins with Thiamine/B1. Helps with a good even skin tone. And I'd second the Fake and Bake. Spray would be a safer bet. It lasts a good while and will be very even.
At what point did my life go Looney Tunes? How did it happen? Who's to blame?... Batman, that's who. Batman! It's always been Batman! Ruining my life, spoiling my fun! >:-)
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Harley Quinn

Quote from: archlord on November 25, 2015, 06:47:51 PM
Sometimes i feel like it would be easier if everyone knew.  I wouldnt have to lie about my condition.  It is even more annoying when you walk by someone and this person have  a weird look or a smile at you.
They'll know on your schedule... when you're ready. Until then we're all here to help. :)
At what point did my life go Looney Tunes? How did it happen? Who's to blame?... Batman, that's who. Batman! It's always been Batman! Ruining my life, spoiling my fun! >:-)
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archlord

Quote from: Harley Quinn on November 25, 2015, 06:53:45 PM
Multi Vitamins with Thiamine/B1. Helps with a good even skin tone. And I'd second the Fake and Bake. Spray would be a safer bet. It lasts a good while and will be very even.

Thank you , i will take every advice if it can help with my case
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archlord

This is how i look right now when going to work ( sorry about concealer on upper lip zone it looks like my skin is now to pale for this color) . 

Do i look like a freak ?

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Harley Quinn

Not at all love... you don't even look that pale. You do look like a 15 year old though.

Please don't take that wrong... I mean it as a compliment. You have good skin. Just think how cute you're going to be once your through this awkward phase!
At what point did my life go Looney Tunes? How did it happen? Who's to blame?... Batman, that's who. Batman! It's always been Batman! Ruining my life, spoiling my fun! >:-)
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RobynD

You're beautiful. You don't look sick to me at all. Great skin.


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archlord

Quote from: Harley Quinn on November 25, 2015, 08:02:29 PM
Not at all love... you don't even look that pale. You do look like a 15 year old though.

Please don't take that wrong... I mean it as a compliment. You have good skin. Just think how cute you're going to be once your through this awkward phase!

Yeah i know i look so young   thank you.  But i am pale look at this :

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Harley Quinn

Oh, sweetheart... that's fair skin bordering on Porcelain. And it's beautiful! But like I said...if it is bothering you, Fake and Bake. You have gorgeous skin. Don't be too hard on yourself. :)
At what point did my life go Looney Tunes? How did it happen? Who's to blame?... Batman, that's who. Batman! It's always been Batman! Ruining my life, spoiling my fun! >:-)
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katrinaw

1) You have looks to die for xx (even without the hairpiece :) )
2) Agree very pale skin, but that is good, mines Pinky pale (and easily sun damaged)
3) You don't look sick or anything like that, so don't sweat it
4) Early days and things will round out

Be positive, where your good looks with pride and be confident xxx

Hugs
Katy
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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abd789

Yes, chill dear.... I know its hard though, but I think you look fine. And the black wig does make you look paler, but I dont see it as a bad thing

Im stressing about family gatherings today.... I know Ive changed alot since they all saw me in july. My boobs are going to be hard to hide. I, too, feel it would be better if I just kicked the door open and got it over, but I dont want to be the center of attention on everyones holiday (though I secretly do ;))

I feel I look so much better with fem clothes and makeup and hate hiding it under baggy mens clothes. I guess thats what we want (to feel best as our correct gender).... but I agree, its a scary situation
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katrinaw

Quote from: RitaChans on November 26, 2015, 04:57:22 AM
Yes, chill dear.... I know its hard though, but I think you look fine. And the black wig does make you look paler, but I dont see it as a bad thing

Im stressing about family gatherings today.... I know Ive changed alot since they all saw me in july. My boobs are going to be hard to hide. I, too, feel it would be better if I just kicked the door open and got it over, but I dont want to be the center of attention on everyones holiday (though I secretly do ;))

I feel I look so much better with fem clothes and makeup and hate hiding it under baggy mens clothes. I guess thats what we want (to feel best as our correct gender).... but I agree, its a scary situation

Me too, hiding in men's clothes, its not me, it just makes me feel YUK!!!!!

Katy xx
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Gertrude


Quote from: archlord on November 25, 2015, 06:47:51 PM
Yeah i might try this or go back to tanning bed.  My skin is so pale

Sometimes i feel like it would be easier if everyone knew.  I wouldnt have to lie about my condition.  It is even more annoying when you walk by someone and this person have  a weird look or a smile

Does your employer have policies that support transition and protect your job?


Sent from my iPhone, inspected and certified by the NSA
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Girl Beyond Doubt

QuoteDo i look like a freak ?
You are beautiful, you certainly do not look like a freak. I envy you.

In the picture without the wig you look even more feminine to me than when you are wearing one. You don't need it any more. Grow your own hair if possible. If your job situation does not allow that while you are presenting male, consider coming out and going full time, of course only together with HR and when you have all your chicks in a row.

If you want to do just one thing about your face, don't tan your skin, but get that beard zapped ASAP.
The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself - Mark Twain
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Ms Grace

Has your doctor run a blood test? You could be iron deficient which might account for your pale skin. Best to check.

The transition stage can be very difficult because you feel even more trapped between two genders. You're looking great though, the question is when do you want to go full time?
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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