Let's see if i can write one of these kind of posts. Hm, i am a 20 (21 in a couple of weeks) year old MtF living in Sweden. I've been on hormones for almost a year now. Started electrolysis a bit more than a month ago. Generally things are looking the usual shade of pale gray. I study computer science at university, and don't have much friends. Even though i don't have much of a life, i don't have much energy for studying either. I have failed about half of my courses so far. The biggest highlight in the week is my electrolysis appointments
I find i actually quite like the pain. What i don't like is (of course) that i have to let it grow out before appointments, and being all red and scarred afterwards. But before i used to pluck everything and all the ingrown hairs made me almost as scarred, so i really shouldn't complain
(and both the hair and scars are not as noticeable now as when i started a month ago)
I wonder if i might be weird for a mtf. I don't feel i have ever fully tried to pass. I havn't had any problem wearing dresses and stuff in public without passing, in fact i kind of preferred not looking as i was trying to pass as then i wouldn't have to be embarrassed for not passing
Now i have totally no clue as to if/when i am passing or not. Most people are referring to me as female, but it is probably out of pity or something. I never wear makeup (mostly because i don't really know how to..). My boobs have almost reached a size normal for boys by now. (Before hrt there were nothing but skin covering my ribs, i am serous, you could totally see every bone clearly in my body.) I am quite long (175cm ~5'8.9''?), and of course i am self conscious about shoulders and jawbones and feet and stuff. In short i am chronically messed up and confused but living with it.
