Heartbreak

[Ryan55]

Wasn't sure where to put this but I guess I need to vent....I was with my girl pre transition and during my transition now, she was nothing but supportive and encouraged me to go through with it...found out she's been talking to some other guy...said she wasn't all that comfortable with my body yet...it's a lot of ->-bleeped-<- that went into it but I'm hurting really bad and I feel not enough...not worth it...like I was used...like cause I don't have a penis with Sperm I'm not enough....idk if anyone else felt like this or feels like this...it's hard to sleep and ->-bleeped-<- so just trying to vent I guess...I just feel like I wasn't enough....

[Lyndsey]

WOW Ryan
I wish I could tell you what you want to hear. I was married a long time ago back in 1990 my divorce was final as my wife took of with one of my so called best friends and abandoned me and my three small children at the time my youngest was only 9 weeks. well I got a divorce for abandonment and raised my three kids my self two girls and one son. all within a 4 year spread in age and I was trying to run a large Plumbing and Heating company I owned. I di it and did not date anyone for years. It is kind of funny but my children all gave me both Mothers and Fathers day cards ever sense I can remember. When I came out to my kids first of my transition from M to F they didn't even say anything bad they only supported me as my oldest said to me I was alway both Mom & Dad all in one package. Now they all call me Mom and all 6 of my grandchildren 4 boys and 2 girls call me grammy. Sometimes I think my ex must wonder what happened to me and all the kids. well I din't know this till I was talking to my oldest Daughter Julie who is now 33 years old that there mother came by a year ago and asked to see everyone and my daughter Julie told her that we don't only have one mother and father all in one and that was me she was referring to. She old her to go away or she would call the police as they do not want her in there lives as it has been for 26 years. She made me proud and She kept it in till this past November when I said what I said. she said there was nothing to talk about just a stranger at the door. God I love my Kids and Grandkids.

Try to keep your head up there is someone out there for everyone in time you will forget about her. I know it hurts I have been there with a trailer load of kids that I would not change for anything.

Hugs
Lyndsey

[Ryan55]

Thank you, your story makes mine seem small, I'm glad your kids were very supportive! I know it hurts now, my mind just racing, hopefully I can find someone who will want me for me. I'm so glad your doing good now!

[suzifrommd]

I feel sorry for her. She doesn't know what a wonderful guy she just left behind.

I hope the next woman who comes along actually deserves you.

[Keri L]

hopefully I can find someone who will want me for me.

Ryan, that's the only role you can play with 100% accuracy, honesty and consistency.  And, if someone only liked you for playing some other role, would it really feel valid to you anyway?

Be true to yourself, and when you find that someone who loves you for that (and, you will), then you can treasure it and know that it's real.

xxoo

[Lyndsey]

Thank you, your story makes mine seem small, I'm glad your kids were very supportive! I know it hurts now, my mind just racing, hopefully I can find someone who will want me for me. I'm so glad your doing good now!

Hi Ryan

It not about me now it about you and I know that you will pull threw this as we all seam to somehow or other.  I know how much It can hurt. Believe me! I think I cried for a month. Be strong like the man you are.

Hugs
Lyndsey

[Lyndsey]

Ryan, that's the only role you can play with 100% accuracy, honesty and consistency.  And, if someone only liked you for playing some other role, would it really feel valid to you anyway?

Be true to yourself, and when you find that someone who loves you for that (and, you will), then you can treasure it and know that it's real.

xxoo

Hi Keri

I love your softness in your Heart and I could sense it big as I know Ryan will. You are a sweet women and will like being on here.

Big Hug's
Lyndsey

[King Malachite]

Man, that sucks.  :/  I'm really sorry you had to go through this, Ryan.  You two seemed pretty happy, at least from what I've read from your previous posts.  I know this might be tough to do right now, but look on the bright side.  At least she had the guts to have that conversation with you (even if the conversation may have been forced).  She could have just up and abandoned you without warning, leaving you with no real closure.  Also, look at yourself.  You have a lot of qualities going for you.  You are super handsome, very masculine and buff, and you're a cool, educated  guy.  I don't think you will have too many problems trying to find another girl.  In the meantime, take all the time you need to mourn the loss of your girlfriend, and once you feel ready to move on, look for brighter days ahead.  Hang in there.  I'm rooting for you!

[Ryan55]

Thanks for the support guys, I know I'm not the only one who goes through this stuff, but it f***** hurts, I think more so cause she was there before and at the beginning of the transition and was a huge support beam, now it feels like I lost that