What is Femininity?

[Nero]

What is Femininity? What isn't Femininity?

What is the state of being Feminine?

REAL thinking required. Meaning no 'Can't quantify it', 'It just is' type statements.

[tinkerbell]

I am.  In other words..it's being the woman you really are and being proud of it.

tink

[MichelleT]

I am.  In other words..it's being the woman you really are and being proud of it.

tink

So a butch lesbian and a lipstick lesbian would both be feminine as long as they were being the woman they really are and proud of it?

[tinkerbell]

I am.  In other words..it's being the woman you really are and being proud of it.

tink

So a butch lesbian and a lipstick lesbian would both be feminine as long as they were being the woman they really are and proud of it?

I answered the question based on my own person.  But if you want to apply it to other people, be my guest.

tink

[Sandy]

I am.  In other words..it's being the woman you really are and being proud of it.

tink

Here here!

That is *exactly* the way I feel!  I am the woman I really am and damn proud of it!  I am feminine!

-Sandy

[MichelleT]

I answered the question based on my own person.  But if you want to apply it to other people, be my guest.

tink

You seem annoyed.

I wasn't attacking you Tink, but I guess it could seem that way.

If your definition of femininity doesn't apply to other people then I'm ok with that.

[tinkerbell]

You seem annoyed.

I wasn't attacking you Tink, but I guess it could seem that way.

Hmmm...I wasn't annoyed and I didn't feel attacked.  You said nothing that could have been regarded as an attack.

If your definition of femininity doesn't apply to other people then I'm ok with that.

As I said above:

I answered the question based on my own person. 

tink

tink

[no_id]

What is Femininity (Do read this in a 'in my opinion' format)

What is a man, what is a woman when all biological aspects and influences are stripped? Body. Hormones. Their functions and effects annihilated. Then definitions take far more thorough thinking, and an answer may never be given. Nevertheless, even then someone will still say "But, I am a woman" -- through sense, a deep realisation that cannot be explained that easily by scientific connotations. Gender may be a possibility to define it.

But, let's return to the initial question -- after all, this was only a short introduction in order to build a 'stop' sign at the right path -- What is femininity, not what is female, no; what is feminine.

Let's assume that femininity is perceived as feminine. The butch lesbians serves as a nice example for this (let's pick a stereotype shall we): most likely not percevied as very feminine, but most likely also not seen as less of a woman than the lipstick lesbian (the lesbian part is a bit of a given, innit?). Nevertheless, the point is, as this example suggests, that there are standards constituted in order to determin what is feminine (gender behaviour) and what is not.

Since we already dropped hormones and all the other biological jazz that may affect gender behaviour, the previous constituted standards in relation to perception seem rather linked to stereotypical venues. In this case, gender behaviour or the focus femininity would be associated with prehistoric connotations as well as etiquettes handled over previous centuries. The common images of gentleman and lady, introductions of pink and blue show that certain standards were handled. Although fluctuation between (these set) masculine and feminine behaviours has become acceptable (and in some circumstances even applauded as well as promoted) there is still a common perception to which certain demeanour is ascribed.

Therefore, I'll conclude that all these personal opinions lead to one grande personal opinion, yes my opinion, that was already mentioned once:

Femininity is what is perceived as feminine by stereotypical standards.... (In my opinion, of course...)


The Mad Hatter strikes again! [insert goofy theme-song]........... Now I want more coffee.

[buttercup]

Femininity is what is perceived as feminine by stereotypical standards.... (In my opinion, of course...)

I agree with your opinion no_id, that it is by stereotypical standards that we identify what is feminine.  When a person is described as feminine without seeing them, it conjures up in your mind various adjectives, such as - soft, gentle, kind, effeminate, womanly, tender, sweet etc.  Feminine can be used for male or female, it is a very common word to describe someone in a nutshell, besides physical attributes like being blonde, slim etc.
IMO, you would not describe a butch lesbian as feminine, you would say they are female.  Being feminine does not go hand in hand with being female.

buttercup 

[Dorothy]

Call me old fashioned but it's something going out of style real quick and it will be one of the worlds greatest losses.
Femininity is something that allows a woman to become a lady, it permits a lady to perform in a manner than she can act in disguise and still act with grace. It is also a side to a woman that can show gentleness and express confidence with style. I could go on but I'm sure there are many who disagree -alas the times we live in.

[Jessica]

After a good bit of thought on the subject:

Exhibiting behaviors which society has set for the female sex.

Why?
Femininity is different based on what culture you are in.

For instance, in India it is expected ones wife to walk behind and to the left? of men.
This isn't the case in the U.S.

In the U.S. that behavior would be strange
In India this behavior would be 'feminine'

[MichelleT]

After a good bit of thought on the subject:

Exhibiting behaviors which society has set for the female sex.

Why?
Femininity is different based on what culture you are in.

For instance, in India it is expected ones wife to walk behind and to the left? of men.
This isn't the case in the U.S.

In the U.S. that behavior would be strange
In India this behavior would be 'feminine'

I do not see that as feminine behavior. For me, you could have one wife walking behind and she could be very feminine while another wife walking behind could be very unfeminine.

[Butterfly]

Femininity has 3 pillars: 1- grace & poise, 2- confidence, &
3- feeling beautiful. When the three pillars combine a female gives off an inviting aura which renders her stunning in a man's caliber for charm. Figure is intrinsic to be beautiful but beauty isnt the generic component for the concept of eye catching or attractive.  Its charm that counts. Beauty that can't charm is a tragedy! Oh yes, femininity is a heterosexual construct >

[Sandy]

Oh yes, femininity is a heterosexual construct >

I was with you up until that last part.  Could you clarify it please?

I consider myself feminine, but I am not heterosexual.  I never thought the two were at all linked.

-Sandy(Confused)

[MichelleT]

Oh yes, femininity is a heterosexual construct >

I was with you up until that last part.  Could you clarify it please?

I consider myself feminine, but I am not heterosexual.  I never thought the two were at all linked.

-Sandy(Confused)

That makes two of us.

[MichelleT]

Femininity is a cage used to control people

If that is the case then I wish there were more such wonderful cages.

[Butterfly]

Oh yes, femininity is a heterosexual construct >

I was with you up until that last part.  Could you clarify it please?

It'd be my pleasure.  Femininity is a natural trait attributed to something female.

Masculinity is natural trait attributed to something male.

Each are heterosexual constructs because when either group portrays traits of the opposite sex it is unnatural since a man cannot be naturally feminine, and a woman cannot be naturally masculine.

There are women who are not overtly feminine, and men who are not overtly masculine, however, you cannot say a man is naturally feminine or a woman is naturally masculine because in order for them to portray those qualities they would have to exaggerate external verbal, or non-verbal cues in order to convey those traits to other people.

[MichelleT]

Femininity is a cage used to control people

If that is the case then I wish there were more such wonderful cages.

Many people do...

Probably because most people are either in the masculine or feminine spectrum of sexual essence. Those who are balanced or neutral are probably the ones who feel the way you do.

[no_id]

Oh yes, femininity is a heterosexual construct >

I was with you up until that last part.  Could you clarify it please?

It'd be my pleasure.  Femininity is a natural trait attributed to something female.

Masculinity is natural trait attributed to something male.

Each are heterosexual constructs because when either group portrays traits of the opposite sex it is unnatural since a man cannot be naturally feminine, and a woman cannot be naturally masculine.

There are women who are not overtly feminine, and men who are not overtly masculine, however, you cannot say a man is naturally feminine or a woman is naturally masculine because in order for them to portray those qualities they would have to exaggerate external verbal, or non-verbal cues in order to convey those traits to other people.

So basically, you're talking hormones right? Preset biological structures? Since you used the phrase 'natural'. Unless of course you meant 'natural influences' which would bring us back to the psychological base... After all, else the above rather reads as stating Transsexuals are unnatural?

Not attacking, just pondering and making sure everything is clear in order to avoid misinterpretations.

[MichelleT]

The best explanation I've read of masculinity and femininity comes from the book Intimate Communion by David Deida. Here is a brief excerpt:
http://deidacentral.com/what_is_sexual_essence.html