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Feminine postures and mannerisms

Started by Emily Rose, January 27, 2016, 03:08:01 PM

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Emily Rose

Hi all

Just after a bit of help really as I'm new to all this. I've got a lot to learn and go through but if I'm going to do this, I'm the sort of person that wants to be the best that I can be. 

The reason I'm saying this is part of my job as a driving instructor is watching people and I've started noticing things about how ladies drive that men don't do, hence my thoughts that if I could replicate these it would make me appear more feminine. The two that I have noticed are that ladies tend to drive with both knees in contact with each other (very hard as a man to replicate) and ladies for some reason tend to drive with their elbows down at there sides.

Can anybody add extras. Doesn't have to be the same situations but things that only ladies do?


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Deborah

Where else could elbows go when driving other than at your sides.  Any other place would seem to be anatomically very uncomfortable if both hands are on the wheel.


Sapere Aude
Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Emily Rose

if your holding th steering wheel correctly, U.K. Anyway, your arms should be out reached on the wheel with a slight bend in the elbows, not arms straight down with elbows tucked in and forearms at a right angle to the body. 

Sorry for being so precise. But it's who I am lol
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Emily Rose

That's why I thought I'd ask this question has anyone else seen or noticed things that I could do to promote my feminine side?


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KathyLauren

Quote from: Spookie on January 27, 2016, 04:02:23 PM
if your holding th steering wheel correctly, U.K. Anyway, your arms should be out reached on the wheel with a slight bend in the elbows, not arms straight down with elbows tucked in and forearms at a right angle to the body. 

Sorry for being so precise. But it's who I am lol
That may be anatomic and ergonomic, rather than a mannerism.  Women tend to have shorter legs than men, and therefore have their seat farther forward to reach the pedals.  That puts the torso closer to the wheel, therefore the elbows are lower.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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Deborah

I wonder if that's partially due to shorter legs requiring the seat to be pulled closer to the wheel?

My normal driving position is with my hands in my lap at the 5 and 7 o'clock position on the wheel with my upper arms and elbows tucked into my side.  It's not what our driving manuals teach but rather something I learned in an evasive driving course to provide maximum control of the wheel during violent maneuvers.  I'm not expecting that here but it's also a very relaxed and comfortable driving position.


Sapere Aude
Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Emily Rose

What I'm actually looking at though is, are there any characteristics that I could use that could feminise  who I am, without having to wait for dr/therapists and hormones
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Serenation

As an instructor I assume you would already know and be teaching people correct driving positions.
I will touch a 100 flowers and not pick one.
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Emily Rose

I. Do,  but I can only comment about the rights and wrongs here,  different countries have different regulations
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Deborah

The only consistent mannerisms I have noticed is the way you cross your legs.  Other than that men and women both are all over the map and other than exaggerated stereotypes sit, gesture, etc. pretty similarly.

Some specific things are obvious in specific clothing like heels and dresses but largely absent in flat shoes and slacks.


Sapere Aude
Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Tristyn

I'm not trying to sound like a jerk or start any trouble, but in the greater scheme of things why does any of this even matter to us?

I think this is so silly. If we have to teach and constantly remind ourselves to sit, act and/or talk a certain way, doesn't this defeat the purpose of simply being ourselves?

Anyway, its really hard just being ourselves but even harder to be artificial....at least in my opinion it is.
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Deborah


Quote from: King Phoenix on January 27, 2016, 06:29:07 PM
I'm not trying to sound like a jerk or start any trouble, but in the greater scheme of things why does any of this even matter to us?

I think this is so silly. If we have to teach and constantly remind ourselves to sit, act and/or talk a certain way, doesn't this defeat the purpose of simply being ourselves?

Anyway, its really hard just being ourselves but even harder to be artificial....at least in my opinion it is.
I agree with you.  For me, I decided last year I wasn't going to make any efforts to act in any way that didn't just come naturally and comfortably.  I already spent a lifetime watching my every move to be sure it fit within certain narrow definitions.  And how well did that work out!  I'm done with all the acting.  It's time just to be myself for the first time since I was 13.


Sapere Aude
Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Tristyn

I'm not saying it would be easy though....

I just think that it makes more sense to be who we are than to be things people say we are or should be. Its never easy because humanity loves to scrutinize things, including other people. That's why we post threads like this. We really want to be accepted. What better way to be accepted than to look "normal?"
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itsApril

Quote from: Spookie on January 27, 2016, 03:08:01 PM
. . . I've started noticing things about how ladies drive that men don't do, hence my thoughts that if I could replicate these it would make me appear more feminine. . . .

Can anybody add extras. Doesn't have to be the same situations but things that only ladies do?

Honestly the only thing I've noticed that's different about the way women drive is that women stop and ask for directions when they're lost.  Men just drive on, hoping they'll get there somehow, even without knowing where they are going.
-April
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kittenpower

Quote from: itsApril on January 27, 2016, 08:11:30 PM
Honestly the only thing I've noticed that's different about the way women drive is that women stop and ask for directions when they're lost.  Men just drive on, hoping they'll get there somehow, even without knowing where they are going.
I used to ask for directions before GPS and Siri came into my life   :laugh:
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Emily Rose

I must admit. I hate sat navs. I never get lost though, I just take detours


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Ms Grace

The site is open to people to explore their gender identity however they chose, if learning mannerisms makes them feel better about themselves then it's perfectly valid for them to ask.

To answer your question Spookie there are many subtle and not so subtle differences between the postures, body language and mannerisms of men and women. I would recommend spending some time in a public place just casually observing the way women move and interact as a useful starting point. Keep in mind the spectrum is wide, women sometimes do things that are generally regarded to be masculine and vice versa.

The other thing is not to take on a mannerism just because someone else is doing it, it has to feel right and natural to you otherwise it won't look very normal. For me, once I was presenting as female, I just found myself more able to move in a way I had been holding myself back from all my life. It comes more easily than you expect once you are no longer pretending to be a gender you are not.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Cindy

I totally agree with Grace.

As an aside last time I got lost with another female friend who was using Siri to navigate, she asked where are we, and Siri replied 'You are lost.' Useful that.
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Emily Rose

Yeah.. I understand what grace is saying, what makes it right for 1 person, doesn't make it right for everyone, it just seemed like an interesting topic though. I think I should have made the thread title "are there really any differences between masculinity and femininity?" Though
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Emily Rose

And don't you just hate it when technology gives up lol


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