Perhaps a good way to deal with negative feedback from J. Q. Public is to understand that they are broken in one way or another. Some part of their life is so bad that they have to try to bring others down.
A well adjusted, emotionally healthy person would be supportive.
Boston MA. My best friend is a dwarf. She has a masters degree in education and works at Harvard in Harvard Square, possibly one of the most civilized places on Earth. She is harassed, in one form or another, everyday, by the public. I don't know how she bares it and keeps going and lives to laugh another day and walks out the door, everyday. It brings me some comfort to know that one doesn't have to be a transsexual to be harassed. Lucky for me, one day, I might be passable. She will always be a dwarf. Her sentence is lifelong and there's no surgery for it.
Some random guy said at me recently, "That is one ugly man." He was with a woman and baby. The woman whipped her head to look at me. She looked kind of scared or worried or embarrassed. Unfortunately, he couldn't have been talking about anyone but me. Believe me, I looked around for any other possible target.
I don't know how people put up with this but I have to figure it out... not to "live authentically" but simply to win and throw up a good finger at anyone who disapproves.
How to deal with it? Firstly, I am wishing him a slow, agonizing, painful death, hopefully one that I can watch. And/or, in an effort to fake emotional health I understand that he sucks, is limited, is probably a ->-bleeped-<-??, and that he's a !@#$!@#$!@#$. He was probably checking me out from afar because at 20 feet away (or further) I'm a hot leggy blond in great shape. Then, when he was close enough to see that I am a transsexual, he was probably terrified that his woman would think, "omg he's checking out a dude" or something. As such, in an effort to salvage his, possibly threatened manhood, he had to make some sort of !@#$ing comment JUST like the boys in highschool had to call me a ->-bleeped-<- every day to prove what manly men they were.
It feels the same now as it did in highschool. How to shrug it off? How to be one of those, "water off a duck's back" kind of people? I never have been. I'm more of a "bare grudges to the grave" type of person. I carry around grudges as my cardio. I wrap myself up in grudges to keep warm at night.
I think the trick is to understand the motivation behind why someone would make such a negative comment. What kind of person feels the need to express themselves in such a way as to purposefully hurt another person? This kind of person is emotionally ill, angry, damaged, hurt... This kind of person needs to say something negative about a transsexual possibly because they hate the trapped transsexual in themselves or they are attracted to the transsexual and need to let everyone around them know that they aren't or they are simply in pain and want to make sure others are in pain too. Angry people in pain just need to spread it around.
