Feminine postures and mannerisms

[Valwen]

Things like this tend to be interconnected, from a young age society tries to tell girls to not stand out, dont take up too much space, be unassuming, exc. This is just more of that, even in a situation where a woman is in control (such as driving) Most women will instantly sit and move in a way that keeps them from taking up space. This is not genetic but rather learned behavior from years of being told to sit up straight, clean up after yourself, dont talk back, smile, dont act too forward or strong you might upset the boys.

ok rant over, stupid sexisim, stupid society.

Serena

[Mavis]

Just be yourself, people who try come off as flamboyant and unnatural to me. Over the years I spent a lot of energy covering up what people perceive as feminine, how I sit, talk, hold a glass etc.

After coming out to my wife, mother and sisters what I heard was rather eye opening. My wife said there were a number of times throughout the years that she thought "okay then" when seeing my posture sitting but never thought too much into it. My sisters said that explains why you always came off so awkward.

Because that is what it truly is, if you try to do something that is not natural to you, it comes off awkward to others and makes you stand out. But if you just be you, then you will fit in and people will not question it.

I still struggle with this though, so many years of covering up who I am, makes it difficult to just be me. I was laying in bed with my wife watching TV. and out of no where she says look at you and your little legs and instantly I went ridged into guy mode.

I can't explain what it was that I was doing with my legs that came off so feminine but what I can say is that it came because I was becoming comfortable being myself around my wife and years of suppression caused a knee jerk reaction to stop when someone took notice.

In other words, as you become more comfortable with you, you will find yourself but don't force it otherwise it will come off unnatural and awkward.

[Tech_Nymph]

Personally. I'd rather be myself rather then cater to every female stereotype in existence. The critical goal of a trans person is to be your true self is it not?
So why try to act like someone you're not?
Sure, some cis/trans girls are super femme and that's perfectly okay.
But even some cis girls are quite the opposite. And they still lead happy lives as women.
Most of us likely fall somewhere inbetween. And even if you're not. That doesn't deprive us of being women.
Others can judge all they want. They're likely more miserable then one can even fathom. Hence why they spend time ripping on stereotypes.
Do what feels right to you.

Kindly,
Nymph

[Chrissy1979]

Some of these posts have made me less anxious about being a female in terms of mannerisms. I was concerned I'd never carry myself or have mannerisms consistent with a female. It is quite a lot of pressure to put on oneself, and as has been said, there is a broad spectrum of cisgirls in how flamboyant or reserved they can be.

By recognising my dysphoria and being honest enough to myself, I believe it has already opened myself to allowing more feminity into my life. I, like many eventually felt overwhelmed with the stress of coming across as masculine. I suppose the scope of female mannerisms will just naturally find their own natural level and I like the idea of not putting any pressure in that aspect of my behaviour.

But in saying that, it is quite fascinating people watching and noticing mannerisms and interactions from an anthropology point of view but perhaps the key is not to have strong expectations of myself