Not a fan of doctors

[Amy413]

I'm not going to go deeply into why, it's an extensive subject. But I have extreme difficulty trusting doctors. And getting along with them. I also have a very strong anti-authority streak in me, a doctor is just someone else telling me what to do. I also do not see "modern medicine" as the be-all end-all, it is poisoned by money and ignorance.

I consider "going to the doctor" as a LAST resort for anything. They are good for patching up holes, not much else.
There are too many ulterior motives in the world to trust institutions of medicine.

But HRT seem dependent on regular doctor visits, 
I'd have to go deal with a person I know I will hate (any doctor) on a regular basis, in  place I hate (any medical office). Anywhere you go medicine is so cold and conveyor belt. Clinics & Hospitals are some of the most unpleasant places, houses of death.

It's like having to surrender and submit to the enemy to have to do beg a doctor for anything.
Pretty much ALL doctors are arrogant PITFA's who think they are god, they speak down to patients.

That is a major thing holding me back.

I HATE doctors!!!!
"do no harm".....pfft.... that is a LIE. make money, that is their creedo)
necromancers.

Give someone a PHD and they suddenly think they are omni-everything.

[purplewuggybird]

I know I am representing the opposition right now, and I completely respect your opinion. However, I would not glean the same response about my care in my city. It really depends on the environment. I have plenty of doctors that I know and I regard many of them as my friends, and they are allies. I think it's important to understand that many doctors (not speaking for the crowd here) spend thousands of dollars to attend school, then work long hours in a highly stressful environment just to do something that they thought was fun when they were a kid. I just want to you to see the doctors in a more human light, and then maybe you might think differently.


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[Elis]

I share your views. The few doctors/psychiatrists I've met tended to be patronising and clueless. Although I understand that like PWB has said they're under a lot of stress plus have targets they need to meet.
I dislike how doctors are clueless about trans patients too. They can always do some research online as GPs aren't given information on how to treat transgender people here in the UK. But I can't blame them too much because there aren't many of us plus many doctors are of my parents generation.
I'm my GPs first trans patient so she has to learn a few new things. I hate how I feel like I'm inconveniencing or burdening her; but it has to be done. Just think that if you stay head strong and seem like you know what you're doing; you'll get the hormones you need which makes the awful process so worth it.

[Amy1988]

I'm not going to go deeply into why, it's an extensive subject. But I have extreme difficulty trusting doctors. And getting along with them. I also have a very strong anti-authority streak in me, a doctor is just someone else telling me what to do. I also do not see "modern medicine" as the be-all end-all, it is poisoned by money and ignorance.

I consider "going to the doctor" as a LAST resort for anything. They are good for patching up holes, not much else.
There are too many ulterior motives in the world to trust institutions of medicine.

But HRT seem dependent on regular doctor visits, 
I'd have to go deal with a person I know I will hate (any doctor) on a regular basis, in  place I hate (any medical office). Anywhere you go medicine is so cold and conveyor belt. Clinics & Hospitals are some of the most unpleasant places, houses of death.

It's like having to surrender and submit to the enemy to have to do beg a doctor for anything.
Pretty much ALL doctors are arrogant PITFA's who think they are god, they speak down to patients.

That is a major thing holding me back.

I HATE doctors!!!!
"do no harm".....pfft.... that is a LIE. make money, that is their creedo)
necromancers.

Give someone a PHD and they suddenly think they are omni-everything.

Well you better learn to like Doctors if you are going to transition. 

[Amy413]

Doctors are people. I get that part.
A doctor is also a "god complex" profession.
Like  mine, software developer.
Highly intellectual professionals have a strong tendency towards arrogance.
Most doctors are just a cog in an HMO machine, the "patients" are just files in an inbox.
I guess it's the institution of "medicine" that bothers me and what it does to people who work in it.
Bureaucracy strips a person of their humanity, many hospitals and clinics are just bureaucratic venues.

I have a scientific mind and I study my own anatomy. My own health has to me my concern. I can't rely on some over worked ego to give me the attention my health needs, only I can do that for myself. So I (we also) must become our own "doctors", That is if we want to be healthy. It may be discouraged to self diagnose and self medicate, but that feels more like a sales pitch diverting people to an expensive industry. How on earth can I expect anyone else to know what happening inside ME besides ME?

Personally I feel the "health care industry" is taking very divisive and unethical tactics to completely dominate everyone's lives from "cradle to grave". Medicine is a business. Individual doctors may be humans who might care, but the "institution of medicine" is an industry who's SOLE purpose is to make money, like any other industry.

It's not so much the doctors, it is who they are working for.
People who want to control.

But then that takes us into controversial topics, so maybe I should stop. many do not want to hear what I have to say and would love to believe this kind of thing is not true.

I seek true healers, not corporate employees or government bureaucrats.

[Mariah]

I can understand your dislike of doctors. I had to face that when coming out to my previous GP just to get referrals and blood tests ordered. In the end he ordered the tests, bu wouldn't do the referrals. So I was transferred to another doctor in the clinic who would. I hope your able to face your fear so you can get the help you need to transition. Hugs
Mariah

[Amy413]

I rarely go to doctors. last time I saw a doctor was almost 15 years ago, just had my ear cleraned out. Then 5 years before that I had an ear infection. Other than that. I haven't had a need to visit one. I'm fairly healthy and heal fast. I have an excellent immune system. Poor diet is my biggest problem. No energy.

It all just is so corporate to me, the business aspect is glaringly obvious to me. It makes me distrust anything they have to say.

Sure, if I can manage to locate some good healers among all that I'll work with them, but I have no idea how to find them. I have to meet someone and get a sense for them individually. Their degree says little to me. I understand the reality of life and that it's necessary to have to ask a doctor for help. I'm getting older, soon I will have no choice.

I just see how people end up becoming financially enslaved to the medical system, not just financially, but even in places with public care, they are just plain enslaved to that national system, obligated to conform to the regulations. Public or private it's a machine.

I guess to phrase my feelings in this thread better, how do I find the REAL DOCTORS within that machine?
I have not had much luck in the past.

And I would like to to this with the minimum of medical involvement. The medical part is only cosmetic anyhow. the REAL "transition" is resolving all the  "%^&&**^$$" inside my head pent up over the years because I have been in hiding as a tran.

I see this as a body-mind-soul thing. A 3 aspects need to be worked on. I have met transgenders who have failed to address all aspects and ended up with rather "clumsy" transitions. My smoking buddy from years ago at work, taught me by example to check all my bases. Poor girl just couldn't get the alcohol part, and finances buried her.
I think she's still alive, but there were rumors. Hope gabby is doing better.

Also, I'm in a bit of a dam burst here because this is the first time I have really reached out to ANY other trans openly like this.

Imagine me as this timid, messy ferile girl with twigs and leaves in her desheveled hair. Hiding up in the branches of trees, growling at anything. A scared little girl ran away and hid decades ago, refused to come out and talk to anyone!

I need a makeover

[Amy413]

I also plan to do this outside the insurance system. I refuse to participate in that madness.

[JLT1]

In now way can you hate doctors as much as I.  They hate me as well.  But I  consider most of them to be tiny brained, big egoed, arrogant wastes of skin that contribute unnecessarily to global warming everytime they spew stupidity or even breathe.

However, I did, after searching, find a competent primary care doctor.  I have not found a competent endo. I did find one who would at least prescribe HRT. I did, after several months of looking, find a competent surgeon for my knee.  There are some good FFS doctors and GCS doctors out there as well.

Reality...you need one to transition so start looking.  Good ones are few and far between but they exist. 

Hugs,

Jennifer

[Devlyn]

I have a huge phobia of needles and medical procedures, I stay away from doctors too.

[Amy413]

Yes. I have found many of my "issues" in the way of transition are things like medical fears.

It's not all about "how will I look". As I accept this, and start exploring all the details seriously, it's spooky!
I don't like being poked and prodded. I am very sensitive of my personal space.

Folks like us have always been. These medical things, they are new. before we had to improvise and hide.
Now we have options. I actually think there is a completely natural way this could happen, the code exists within the species blueprint. Medical technology is just now discovering ways to help nature along.

I'm just suspicious of all the charlatans in medicine. The "snake oil salesman" has never gone away, just gotten more sophisticated in their game. I need to know what I can so I can do this right. People are not all bad.

Really my problem boils down to basic trust issues.
Not by doctors(but early memories can be fuzzy), but I have been taken advantage of when I was young. That sort of thing undermines your trust in general.

[AnonyMs]

I don't trust doctors either, but I think you've gone a bit past that into fear, and that's not really a rational place to be. I tend to agree with the facts of what you've said, but I think you're causing yourself problems by the way you handle it.

I treat my doctors much as I treat a plumber or electrician. I pay them and they do they job. Since if they make a mistake its going to be potentially bad I'm always double checking what doctors suggest and deciding if I accept their advice or not. If I find them making a mistake I find someone else. If they don't give me what I want without a really good reason I find someone else.  If I find I'm working against the system I try not to get too upset about it as its pointless and only going to hurt myself, but I do work to find ways around it.

When I started my medical transition I didn't trust anyone, and didn't want to be diagnosed with a psychiatric disorder, so I studied a lot and went around the system. I've managed to cause myself a lot of stress over the years doing all this, and it turns out it was completely unnecessary, at least where I live.

I even spent a lot of effort looking into how to get SRS without RLE, and have worked it out. I'd have to trust the surgeon at the end of the day, but even then its not trust but taking a calculated risk. Anything else is going to harm me, and that's irrational.

[XKimX]

As a young adult, I lived near a major medical institution, and I knew a lot of young doctors at the social level and I had no professional relationships with any of them.  Just like a lot of us, they have big egos and feel as if they have a right to make more money than we do.  Their rationale sounds right to them -- so many years of study means you have a shorter period of time to make your lifetime earning add us.  The seem unfazed by hearing that many other professions have the same educational requirements yet with considerably less income expectations.  Many people enter medical school for idealistic reasons; those reasons rarely survive.  In short, in social situations they are no different from cohorts of other highly educated people.  Everyone on the room is entitled to be called "Doctor," but only some of those are Doctors of Medicine.
One thing I learned is that MDs are expected to know a little bit about everything, so that if some strange disease walks into their office, they will have a chance of figuring out what might be wrong.  Which means their knowledge of any one particular thing is rather small.
Any one of us who has three months to spare can know more about one thing (like our own problem) than any GP physician, and with another three months, even the most expert in their field.  We may lack "credentials," but we are their intellectual equals when talking about conditions that are of interest to us.  Some physicians find that threatening -- their role as god is being challenged -- but others are very glad that their patient is into looking after their own care, and will respect what you have to say.  It is amazing what learning a few new vocabulary words -- and using them correctly -- can do for the way you are treated.

But if you take an active interest in your own care, you will be treated with the respect you deserve, given, of course, that you are not dealing with a mental case.  I think there is more medical information on this website than is available to any trans researcher -- the number of case studies, all voluntarily provided, is impressive.
If a physician is a gatekeeper, I hate them.  I am competent enough not to need paternalism in my health care.  But I cannot operate on myself; for that I need a really competent physician.  And right here on this site we have before us the data that enables us to choose a physician we feel is competent enough to work on us.  We are not marrying them; we are just renting their hands.  Some of the best work can be done by jerks with zero bedside manner.  Fortunately, between us and sharing data, we have uncovered a number of good surgeons who are not jerks and who do have good bedside manners.  The demand is greater than the supply, but we here all seem to have good manners and wait our turn.

No one tells a doctor joke like a physician, especially after a few drinks.  They are people, too, in spite of how much they may wish you did not know that.
We are mutually co-dependent.  Without us as patients they cannot become rich off of our insurance companies, and without them we are stuck in the bodies in which we were born, however mistaken that may have been.
In the same way as women manipulate their husbands to get what they want, we have to manipulate our relationships with the medical profession to get what we need.  We do not have to be supplicants, but we do need to realize that to get what we want there are games to be played.  And as women, we know that we play these games better than they do.

Mod Edit- belittling and insulting members is against TOS 5

[Kylo]

Just say what you gotta say and do what you gotta do to get what you want. It's the order of the day for most of us. We go in having to put forward a case to "prove" our trans status to strangers who probably could care less and are ready not to believe us, and meet the criteria to come out the other side. None of it is really pleasant by all accounts. But if you want it, you do it.

For the record I can't stand hospitals, dislike talking to doctors, and hate the idea of going under the knife. But you know what I hate more? Being in the wrong gender.

[Mariah]

 
Insulting, belittling, ridiculing and even questioning how or in what way people transition is against the TOS and will not be tolerated. We are here to help each other and not insult others or ourselves. Please keep in mind TOS 5, 9, 10, and 15. Thanks
Mariah

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[stephaniec]

I'd just like to throw in a good word. Doctors saved me from dying of anorexia nervosa . They saved me from suicide and they helped me get over a severe drug addiction . I understand people have problems with doctors , but the only reason I'm still alive is because of them.

[Jamie lynn]

Not to get into it too much but I have rare genetic disease that is hereditary. I have t see doctors or I die of cancer. I have been in and out of hospitals or for a good portion of my life, have had seven abdominal operations and almost died. Having said that I have seen. Many doctors in my life, good and bad. One botched an operation and wouldn't quit his golf game to save my life. Others have n thier owne time and for no benefit done research to find the best doctor in the field to help me. Yet others have done operations on myself and m sister free of charge as we had on instance at the time, and this is in the US. I say all of this to say that as with any segment of population you will have the givers and takers. You can't judge all people by the experiences to have with a few. I see one of the best drs in the world for my condition and he is one of the kindest men I know. I think that a  level we start to distrust everyone because of our experience. Be you own advocate, research, know your choice and rights, but give people a chance and have a little faith in humanity.

[Tristyn]

I'm not going to go deeply into why, it's an extensive subject. But I have extreme difficulty trusting doctors. And getting along with them. I also have a very strong anti-authority streak in me, a doctor is just someone else telling me what to do. I also do not see "modern medicine" as the be-all end-all, it is poisoned by money and ignorance.

I consider "going to the doctor" as a LAST resort for anything. They are good for patching up holes, not much else.
There are too many ulterior motives in the world to trust institutions of medicine.

But HRT seem dependent on regular doctor visits, 
I'd have to go deal with a person I know I will hate (any doctor) on a regular basis, in  place I hate (any medical office). Anywhere you go medicine is so cold and conveyor belt. Clinics & Hospitals are some of the most unpleasant places, houses of death.

It's like having to surrender and submit to the enemy to have to do beg a doctor for anything.
Pretty much ALL doctors are arrogant PITFA's who think they are god, they speak down to patients.

That is a major thing holding me back.

I HATE doctors!!!!
"do no harm".....pfft.... that is a LIE. make money, that is their creedo)
necromancers.

Give someone a PHD and they suddenly think they are omni-everything.

Yes! This is exactly how I feel. I do not trust them either but have to see them all the time because I am in poor health. If I had the money I would heal myself by natural means (herbal/home remedies and good nutrition).

I hate their attitude and how they think cause they got a doctorate degree it automatically qualifies as them knowing more about you than you do. My hematologist really pissed me off cause he kept telling me the only way for me to lose the saggy fat on my body from losing lots of weight, is to have it surgically removed. I told him that I could just exercise and eat right, which I am doing now. He kept annoying me because he would shake his head as if not listening to what I had to say and interrupting me to tell me I would need it surgically removed. I'm like thinking, "That idiot. Doesn't he know that's why people exercise; to burn fat? Burning calories burns fat." I want to lose it naturally. I am very tired of surgery and feel like that would be so lazy on my part to have my fat surgically taken off instead of working hard at getting it off naturally.

Yeah. Doctors suck. But at least my hematologist supports me being trans. He tried to get me together with an older FTM for advice. I haven't spoken to him much other than a few texts and emails. I am very scared to meet other trans people in person because I am not used to being around other people like me. I never have.

My kidney doctor is even worse. She barely listens to me either. She will cut me off and won't give me a chance to interject. And she always misgenders me and then turns around and says she didn't.

I could write an encyclopedia on how all doctors suck.



-Phoenix

[Amy413]

Maybe I am being a little personal, attacking 'doctors' themselves.

It is the bureaucratic systems they work for and how their employers strip them of their will to heal that bothers me.

Yes, I understand there are good true healers out there with MD's.
They can be tough to find though.

And in the 21st century the dangers of being sold some "snake oil" are very real.

I also have a problem with authority, a doctor is an authority.

[Rejennyrated]

Maybe I am being a little personal, attacking 'doctors' themselves.

It is the bureaucratic systems they work for and how their employers strip them of their will to heal that bothers me.

Yes, I understand there are good true healers out there with MD's.
They can be tough to find though.

And in the 21st century the dangers of being sold some "snake oil" are very real.

I also have a problem with authority, a doctor is an authority.

Next year, providing I pass my finals, I will be a doctor.... trust me from the inside looking out it doesnt FEEL like one is in "authority" and indeed anyone who has been trained in the last ten or fifteen years will absolutely NOT have the outdated and actively discouraged model of therapuetic relationship!

Sure you may still find it with some older consultants but these days we actually can get FAILED in our medical exams if we trangress the golden principle of patient AUTHONOMY!

We are taught that we should work in a therapeutic partnership with patients and have the utmost respect for the principles of informed consent and consideration of the patients ideas concerns and expectations.

I therefore think you may indeed be being a little hard on us, although I don't doubt that you have had some experiences on which you view is based. Hopefully however things are changing.

Remember it takes about 20 years to qualify as a consultant, therefore the seniors now trained in an era when the world WAS more authoritarian. Those of us who are more recently trained wuld simply not recognise the attitudes that you complain of, because if we tried them we'd be in danger of being thrown out.