How did you identify before transitioning?

[Adchop]

I'm just curious how some of you saw yourself before you decided to transition. I noticed that some of the posters on this board have either identified as a gay man, or at least an effeminate male before transitioning. I've never seen myself as either.

Me personally I have never hated my male persona. I've always enjoyed sports, the outdoors, working on cars, & getting dirty. I've never had many issues getting along/fitting in with my guy friends, but I don't hang with the frat boy crowd either.

I guess for me I'm just a little confused about how to express my GID to people. I've never been attracted to men, or wanted to do frilly girly girl stuff, but I've always felt an immense attraction to the female body, which I guess makes me a lesbian. Emotionally I've always had a softer side to me, that doesn't mesh very well with the ultra aggressive male persona of most men, but I don't feel effeminate either.

For me the appeal in transitioning is to find a body that is more closely aligned with my thoughts and feelings, though I'm not anywhere near the point where my GID is so bad that I feel the need to go all out and present as a woman 100%.

Anybody else currently at this place, or ever felt this way in the past?

[stephaniec]

I'm a hardcore Hippie

[Ms Grace]

I used to refer to myself as an Omicron Male...as opposed to an Alpha Male I saw myself in a totally different part of the alphabet.

[Deborah]

I don't define my sexuality because I'm not really sure and with trans added on top it's a confusing thought.  But more importantly, I'm married and messing around is out of the question so there isn't much point in dwelling on the thought anyway.

Beyond that I'm a Soldier/Warrior and athlete (not a great one though).  While those do fall far outside the trans stereotype they are not gender specific things. 

I am comfortable with what I am.  I'm not about to start trying to fit some new stereotype when in many ways trying to fit all the old ones just  made me unhappy.

I'm editing to add another thought.  Even though what I describe above is entirely non stereotypical I have known I was trans since I was 11 and have identified as female to myself for 45 years. 


Sapere Aude

[Valwen]

I am a Geek. But for the gender/sexuality side of things, I may have only recently transisioned but I have been aware of my gender Identity for most of my life so that has not changed.

Serena

[cheryl reeves]

Sexuality wise I identify as a trans lesbian,I love women,that's why I been married going on 28 yrs too a understanding wife.

I grew too like my male suit because Cheryl did a great job of creating it. I never been athletic,bullies thought I was weak because I looked girlish they learned I was meaner then they were. Hrt and gcs are not for me,I already have natural breast and like my built in strapon what more can a girl ask for..

[kawaiiprincess]

I know for me I came out of the closet as a gay male when I was 16 and still in high school. It took some time now to find who I was and came out as transgender back in 2014. So I guess it depends on your thoughts/emotions and where you were as you grew up.

[RobynD]

I always said i was feminine male, i also used geek but that did not seem to fit stereotypes of geeks because i have always been an athlete. I still consider myself pretty geeky. I never really connected that to my sexuality.

[suzifrommd]

100% straight guy, not in any way conflicted or feminine. I never thought of myself as anything other than a straight male.

I always wished I could have been born a woman, and I accepted those thoughts as a beautiful part of me. I knew it could never be so I made the best of being a man.

Until I found out I really could be a woman. Then there was no stopping me.

[cindianna_jones]

I was hetero male, then hetero female. I was faithful and married before and after. Notice past tense? Now after my marriage has crumbled (not my choice) and I'm older, I'm not seeing a relationship of any kind in my future. If I did, I think I'd prefer female companionship but I seriously don't know. In some ways it sucks but in others... well I'm getting good with being alone.

[Maybebaby56]

How did I identify? Broken. Outcast. Alone.

I was hetero male, then hetero female. I was faithful and married before and after. Notice past tense? Now after my marriage has crumbled (not my choice) and I'm older, I'm not seeing a relationship of any kind in my future. If I did, I think I'd prefer female companionship but I seriously don't know. In some ways it sucks but in others... well I'm getting good with being alone.

I can relate to all of that, Cindi.  I was a hetero male.  Now I don't know what I am.  But whatever it is, I'm pretty sure I'll be doing it by myself.

~Terri

[Adchop]

100% straight guy, not in any way conflicted or feminine. I never thought of myself as anything other than a straight male.

I always wished I could have been born a woman, and I accepted those thoughts as a beautiful part of me. I knew it could never be so I made the best of being a man.

Until I found out I really could be a woman. Then there was no stopping me.

I think this describes where I'm at. I've lived comfortably as a hetero male, but I've also always dreamed of being a woman. Never realized how possible it was until I started doing research

[LivingTheDream]

I'm pretty similar to Suzi. I always thought of myself as 100% straight male. I liked sports and wrestling (until it started getting too rough), video games, pretty typical male things.

I hung out almost exclusively with males too. As we grew older together we sorted drifted apart. It just felt like something was off for me and like everyone else knew something was off too, we just didn't know what. I was accepted but I wasn't accepted you know?

I had thoughts of wishing I was a girl since elementary school. I became totally obsessed with "borrowing" clothes from people; anything that caught my eye I just had to have! I really couldn't help it...Things kept progressing till I found the trans term one day and here I am.

I really don't think I was very good at being a guy. Coming out has allowed me to shed so much baggage that I was carrying from trying.

[sparrow]

I identified as male, but I was never really attached to maleness.  I had lotsa female friends, and frequently thought of myself as "one of the girls."

In terms of sexuality... I was more or less interested in everybody I set my eyes on.  I called that "bisexual" back then, but now I call myself pansexual.

[Stevie]

 I had trouble with how to identify since I was a kid. I would look at forms that asked if you were male or female and I would stare at it for an an inordinate amount of time then skip it and fill out the rest of the form and come back to that question and stare some more at it.

[Claire_Sydney]

I would look at forms that asked if you were male or female and I would stare at it for an an inordinate amount of time then skip it and fill out the rest of the form and come back to that question and stare some more at it.

Ha!! Me too!!

Every single form, ever !

Originally it was a psychological battle of wills about which box to tick.

Now it's becoming more of a memory battle... How am I dressed today? What name am I using right now? Which identity am I using?

[Lady_Oracle]

pretransition I was a teenager trying to be a straight manly male 

[Eevee]

Before transitioning, I tried to act like a straight guy who was totally tough and manly because that was the only way I could be anything other than a freak. That was mostly because of my family, the military, and my ex-wife. I had to keep beating back that repeating thought in the back of my head that kept telling me otherwise. I actually lost my mind a few times trying to push it away. As soon as I didn't have to prove myself to anyone, I was able to just be me.

[Jacqueline]

Don't know that I would say that I am transitioning yet. (although technically I guess I am-more a question of how far).

I always was a very stylish male with the ability to wear very manly styles but still come across with fashion. I think that is how I have been seen till now. Many have thought I was gay. So far I have only been interested sexually in women.

I always saw myself as "Other". I never felt like I fit a description. Till I saw the possibility that I should have been born biologically female.

Joanna

[LJP]

I was Athletic,geeky,outgoing. Never hated my male self. It just never felt right. Like a itch I couldn't scratch. Attracted to females, but enjoy some things a cis woman can't provide. Another trans woman is what I think would be ideal for me.