That's a really tough situation to be in, I'm sorry.
There's no reason you can't be depressed AND trans. In fact, if you're trans and not transitioned it'd be pretty hard to not be depressed on some level, I think. But anyway, I did a lot of the "am I/aren't I" thing and I never had anyone, especially not a healthcare professional, tell me I'm not trans. I can only imagine the sort of doubts I'd have if that happened to me.
But I agree with KathyLauren, that you know yourself better than anyone else can. Nobody else can tell you if you are, or are not, trans. It's something you have to search your feelings and figure out for yourself. And once you've done that, don't let ANYONE convince you otherwise.
There are some questions that can help make things clear...someone should really come up with a big list of things to ask yourself in the beginning, if there's not already one floating around. But things like :
"If I could snap my fingers and be the other gender permanently, would I do it?"
"If I were the only person in the world, which gender would I want to be?" (assuming there's no inherent benefit to being one or the other regarding survival or whatever)
"Which gender do I want to grow old as?"
"Am I okay with people remembering me as the gender I am now?"
The idea is to get past the social stigma or fear of transition or whatever else might be clouding the issue and see how you actually feel about your gender. There are more questions we can ask later, if you decide you are trans, to help figure things out from there. But these will do for now.
Be well
