Quote from: jayne01I don't know what IBS is, but I'm guessing it is just an example you are using.
I have tried cross dressing a couple of times. All I see is a pathetic guy wearing a dress. I don't see anything feminine at all. I have shaved my legs a few times (easy to hide under long pants). I always get mixed feelings when u do that. At first I think I like it then I wonder what the hell am I doing and then regret doing it because it gets itchy as hell and I get shaving rashes. I don't wear any jewellery other than my wedding ring when I'm not at work (too dangerous to wear at work). I have tried wearing women's underpants, unless I make a conscious effort to think that I am wearing them, I don't even know they are there. I watch all kinds of movies with my wife, including chick flicks. Fragrance stores make both me and my wife feel sick. The smell is too overpowering. I rarely find myself in the company of women. All my work colleagues are male and I don't have any friends outside of work. The only women I see are my wife and family and strangers out in public. I often do find myself hearing groups of women talking and think to myself that if I was a woman I would not fit into their conversation at all.
IBS, or irritable bowel syndrome. bloating, cramping, pain, constipation or diarrhea are the most common symptoms. Usually caused by a food allergy or the body unable to properly process. Gluten is a big reason for IBS, lactose intolerance, the inability to digest dairy products. Other things can cause it as well. So, the only way to know what your body is having trouble with is to add and subtract foods to figure out what foods are causing the problem.
As for the crossdressing and other feminization you have attempted, I didn't ask you what you looked like, I asked you how you felt. Leg shaving, is shaving and being itchy and having rashes. It just takes practice like anything else, technique, skin care before and after.
I want to emphasize this as much as possible here............. Because denial is a REAL strong thing. BUT- it could be part of your problem is that while you are likely somewhere in the transgender spectrum, you
may not be a candidate for making a full transition to living as and becoming a woman physically.
All the things I mentioned in my post are things that when I encounter them, a sense of calm and comfort come over me. I feel I belong there. I feel those places are for me. Now, the Olfactics of both you and your wife make it hard to be able to be in high scented places. That happens. Mine are a bit sharper than many. My wife is a licensed hair dresser, although that is not her employment. She just keeps current and does family and friends to stay in practice. But OMG, I gag at the hair dye. Nail salons can be overpowering as well. I guess the reason why you see most of them, in the bigger ones anyway wearing masks. I would definitely have to. *sorry, tangent*
I suggested these things because how they make you feel. That is a strong indicator for many of us. I am very comfortable around the company of only women. I feel I fit in. And I tend to overhear the convos of women when in mixed company quite a bit. I do not post pics and do not spend hardly any time looking in the mirror. unless I am going to do a full transformation which is rare, what is the point? I still primarily look like a guy with some women's clothing on. But I feel good wearing them. I feel right wearing them.
As I said, Denial can be unbelievably strong. You so much do not want to like these things, you can make yourself believe that you don't. Been there, done that. I used to hate, HATE the feeling of fingernails that were so much as even with my fingertips. Or so I thought. Now they are a little past the tips, and it does not bother me at all. I like them better long. And they can even be useful. Granted, I do not have a job that requires me to work hard with my hands.
Now, maybe a reason why you are having such difficulty with the whole trans thing is because you might possibly be in the dude in a dress club, otherwise known as simply a crossdresser. There are many more who are in the TG spectrum who will dress and do other feminine forms of expression, and never transition. Never internally identify as a woman. And they are happy to be this way. They are male, live primarily as male, and occasionally hop over the gender fence once in a while, kinda like a vacation. Just take it all in once a while, then go back to being a regular guy.
I am not saying that is or isn't you. It could be you have so much denial going on that it is blocking you from exploring and enjoying feminine expression. You talk of dysphoria, and that itself comes with a lot of variations. I have none when it comes to my man parts. But body hair drives me insane. A couple days of stubble and I am shaving it. I hate the feeling of body hair. I think it looks gross on me, and it feels gross having it. Laser hair removal may be in my future some day. Shaving nearly my entire body 3 or 4 times a week is a PITA. but I will gladly do that to rid myself of my disgusting body hair.
