QuoteAnd in another incident, my friend, whom I've always thought is prettier than me, she is also transsexual. She was called "sir" by a guy who works at the store. I didn't actually hear him saying anything, even though I was with her.
But I was really shocked to hear that someone addressed to her in such a manner because I thought she was passable and attractive. I have never gotten any sir before after I started the hormones. But I was really mad, but she didn't seem to care, and continue to make her purchase there. I told her this isn't acceptable and I would have said something if I have heard anyone insulting my friend. Anyways, that's what I've been up to in the past few days.
Sorry to hear that such rudeness exists anyplace, especially where you spend money.
I am confrontational about such things. I don't care where or who, I don't let them get away with making me or my Soul Mate feel less than "first class."
Were that supervisor to point me to anyplace without talking with me I would ask him who he was pointing at. I would ask him as many times as it took to get a polite response.
I am extremely resentful of shabby treatment. I've caught guys at the auto repair shop filling me full of bulls**t about what was wrong with my car. I listened and nodded and even said, "Uh huh," and then I ask, "Are you telling me that because I'm a woman, a blond, or both?" Then I ask for the *general manager,* not the service manager and get the answer I want.
Recently I had a service advisor at a local Jeep dealer address me with the male pronoun. I looked to my left and his associate, who did not mistake me for some other gender, was watching and listening intently.
Normally I would get closer to the offending party and tell him (I've never had another woman get on my wrong side) that I don't see any guys at the counter besides him. That usually gets a blush and respect for me.
In this case I got almost nose-to-nose and I told the guy that if he hadn't said it so loudly I might have spoken *at* him more gently, but since his friend was listening, I had to torpedo his ass. I asked him to tell me what gender I am. He apologized and said he was sorry for using the male pronoun. Not good enough, says I. I asked him how much business I have given to his employer. He began to sputter. I took out my driver's license and credit card and forced the issue that he look at it. By that time he was totally stomped-on by me. Then I told his friend that I felt sorry having to do what I did.
I got the respect that is commensurate with doing business. Next time I came in he got it right and I acted accordingly by greeting him pleasantly.
This book gave me a toolbox full of things to use when I am on the receiving end of sexual, gender, or other harassment, be it at work, on a city bus, in a store, an auto repair shop, and on the street. It's called "Back Off!" and it's by Martha J. Langelan. The book is out-of-print but you can buy it from
Amazon.comDon't let anyone disrespect you.
I hope that this helps. If I can be of further help to you or anyone else, please ask.
Wing Walker
