Is it common for people to regret transitioning? +Other risk factors

[2cherry]

Still I couldn't deal with my internalized transphobia until this year. I have always wanted to be a woman.

Thank you. Your post made me aware that I ignored this for too long. I'm struggling with this as well. I even ignored what it actually meant for too long. 

[2cherry]

I connect with so much in this post it is scary! I started hrt in my late 20's, and had my SRS in 2003, when I was 30.
Testosterone had caused so much damage, and it can't all be undone. Trying to accept what I have and make the best of it, and not succumb to bitterness, guilt, self-loathing and jealousy is a challenge I face on a daily basis.
I look at my brother, he has a lovely family, good job, loving partner, two wonderful children, nice big house, etc... He complains about being tired from looking after his kids, and isn't his life tough...
I faux-sympathise with him, he's my little brother and I love him, but inside a fire burns away, and I think "you don't know you're born kiddo". You didn't have to spend half your life hating your existence, and then all your money and time and energy trying to beat Gender Dysphoria. I'd probably be in a better place if I hadn't had to face all that cr@p, somewhere like where he is now.
So yeah, mustn't let those dark thoughts seep into everything around me and spoil what I have. A TG life is tough.

So many things in this thread that resonate with me. Reading that others have the same struggles somehow helps me to try and face my own.
There are so many other posts on this forum that are like that Lego song 'Everything Is Awesome", my eyes glaze over when I read those posts.
I wasn't the OP, but the replies have helped me, thank you.

Yes, in a way, but I think we're also blessed in some weird way... with that I mean that we take nothing for granted, each success or milestone feels awesome, no matter how small. Something very trivial can make our day, like being gendered correctly. While others take everything for granted. There isn't a single step in my transition that wasn't both scary, and an overwhelming powerful feeling of joy. I remember when my hair grew so long, that I felt the wind blowing through my hair, and it made a noise. I was so incredibly happy.

A few weeks ago I was reading an interview with a millionaire who owns a Lamborghini. The interviewer asked him: so what is it like driving this car? The millionaire said: Well, it was fun the first year. After that I became used to it.

And this is the thing, we all seem to plateau and forget to count our blessings. Struggle makes us experience joy and wonder, but in some weird and twisted way.

[V]

Yes, in a way, but I think we're also blessed in some weird way... with that I mean that we take nothing for granted, each success or milestone feels awesome, no matter how small. Something very trivial can make our day, like being gendered correctly. While others take everything for granted. There isn't a single step in my transition that wasn't both scary, and an overwhelming powerful feeling of joy. I remember when my hair grew so long, that I felt the wind blowing through my hair, and it made a noise. I was so incredibly happy.

A few weeks ago I was reading an interview with a millionaire who owns a Lamborghini. The interviewer asked him: so what is it like driving this car? The millionaire said: Well, it was fun the first year. After that I became used to it.

And this is the thing, we all seem to plateau and forget to count our blessings. Struggle makes us experience joy and wonder, but in some weird and twisted way.

You have a very level head and a good way with words.
I find myself agreeing with you again here.
I do take nothing for granted, and live my life on a day-by-day basis. It's those little things that others take for granted, that can sometimes give me such a lift. Like when I go to work, and the security guy on the desk smiles and waves at me and says "Morning Ma'am".
Most people rush past him, but I always have time for the security people, the cleaners, etc... I know if they have kids, how old their kids are, get them some chocolate or something to take home for them. Stuff like that.
And his cheery wave and "Ma'am" means so much to me, much more than he'll ever know.
I often forget to count my blessings, and when I'm depressed, it doesn't feel like I have any.
But as you say, we can experience certain little events that are so special and hard-won to us. Only another TG person would really understand. Gotta focus on them.

[CarlyMcx]

1. Do you know anyone who has regretted transition?

Not personally. 

2. Have any MtF's experienced vomiting when starting HRT? (I plan on taking it in pill form, and I hope to start on a very low dose and ease up)

I am using the patches, and I am also on Spiro.  I have had just a little mild nausea after eating breakfast a few times, but I also have reflux disorder, and it could be that.

3. Should I have my emotional state stabilised before starting HRT?

If your therapist requires it.  I am 53.  I've been suffering anxiety since childhood, anger issues since puberty, and debilitating panic attacks for the last ten years.  Going on hormones has pretty much fixed all of that, and that, not being particularly feminine or pretty (I have no illusions at my age) is why I decided to transition.  I had already tried everything else, and I wanted my sanity back.

[Janes Groove]

Ultimately I feel like life has color now .

Bingo!

[Janes Groove]

Thank you. Your post made me aware that I ignored this for too long.

My only regret is that it took me so long before I finally got unstuck and could finally move forward with my life.
But hey. That's the journey. I guess if truth be told, I'm one of the lucky ones. I finally get to be a woman.