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Androgynous clothes

Started by Amber42, July 12, 2016, 03:31:03 PM

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Amber42

Hi all,

I've been struggling with a thought.  I've always been very fashion conscious - both for men clothes and female clothes.  I have always dressed very well as a man and like to keep a certain look.  I have also been able to tap into my female side and really understand women's fashion.  This is actually pretty amazing for an a IT techie!LOL. My wife has always used me as her personal fashion consultant.

I cannot transition now, but have tried to move to more an androgynous look.  I started down this path and my therapist actually mentioned it to me and highly recommended it while I figure things out.

I have started to wear bracelets (thin leather and fabric), kind of gender neutral...but I bought them in the women's section.  I am 'trying' to grow my hair out a bit but with my extremely curly hair, it's more like growing it up - Afro comes to mind LOL

As for clothes, I'm wearing a lot more skinny, tighter pants, but that's where my imagination ends.  It's amazing that I can't seem to figure out what else I could start wearing.  I guess I've programmed myself to assemble men's OR women's fashion, but nothing in between.

Any suggestions from this great community would be great. 

What are some androgynous ideas?

XO


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Michelle_P

You've got the bottoms covered (um...), so on top try better quality fitted T-shirts, pullovers without the traditional male 'polo shirt' caller, and when it gets cooler, layer with cardigans selected to look a little bit femme in cut and color (just pick something that appeals to you, really).

There's not an 'androgynous' aisle in most clothing stores, so you may find yourself in the woman's aisle. :)

I regularly 'get away with' a woman's jeans, T-shirt, and even simple black sneakers, combined with a man's socks, belt, and a cardigan of questionable origin.
Earth my body, water my blood, air my breath and fire my spirit.

My personal transition path included medical changes.  The path others take may require no medical intervention, or different care.  We each find our own path. I provide these dates for the curious.
Electrolysis - Hours in The Chair: 238 (8.5 were preparing for GCS, five clearings); On estradiol patch June 2016; Full-time Oct 22, 2016; GCS Oct 20, 2017; FFS Aug 28, 2018; Stage 2 labiaplasty revision and BA Feb 26, 2019
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Lyric

As a genetic male who is essentially androgynous, what you're describing is basically the way I dress. I shop on both sides of the isle as desired, though I generally prefer women's wear. I'll share some ideas with you.

Have patience with growing out your hair. After hair has been kept short for a long time the growth direction tends to point up and out. It will take the better part of a year for the weight of the longer hair to change the growth direction. Use gadgets and styling products (gently) during that time to tame things. Just think of how great it will look eventually.

While dresses, skirts, florals and lace don't really fit the andro look, much of modern women's wear can be worn by a genetic male for an andro look. One of the most common feminine semi formal looks is skinny jeans/pants with a close-fit blazer over a basic white or gray top. High heels are often worn with that look, but you can replace them nicely with low top boot-shoes with modest heels for a more androgynous look.

The black biker jacket is a feminine staple that obviously can be worn by a male. I prefer variations of it, though, as well as denim. As for colors, you can't go wrong with solids in black or white with some gray or denim as well. Bright colors should be worn carefully for emphasis. Wear prints even less and just for special emphasis. An andro male is best advised to totally avoid all the stereotypical crossdresser signals: animal prints, black lace, fishnets, stilettos, etc. You can start wearing some makeup, but stay with a "no makeup" look. Obvious eye shadow or eyeliner might not be a good idea.

For tons more ideas, do Google searches of terms like "androgynous fashion" or any celebrity's name plus "fashion". I also follow this site almost daily for ideas: http://outfitidentifier.com/
"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life." - Steve Jobs
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Tama-Ann

You didn't mention make-up but I think this helps with androgyny.
If you look look into J-POP / K-POP male stars tend to wear smudged black eyeliner (usually to elongate their eyes) but it's light and gives a masculine yet feminine look. They also often use brown eyeshadows to give more 'shadow' to their eyes which can give once again a gender mix look. But if you're not a fan of that idea.

I suggest tighter trousers from female section as you said - just remember to position your bits and bobs as the cut on female trousers are much higher, and fitting.
Also loose fitting tops tend to look very feminine (depending on fabrics) if the fabrics are quite thick they tend to look more masculine - I'd suggest having a look at Kanye West, as he's moving into a gender bend fashion movement at the moment - though he uses stronger fabrics to keep quite a masculine feel but the designs themselves are something interesting to look at. (Also look at David Bowie - though his style might be a little too much for your taste) but once again Kanye his looks is feminine top, and masculine bottom, but you were more fitted trousers so his top style might work with you (remember soft fabrics)

I'd also suggest blazers from the female line - as they have a straighter middle and often 1 button opposed to the 3+ men tend to have, mens also have a triangular and heavier aesthetic. While womens are quite soft, and tend to fall off the shoulders but doesn't scream 'woman!'

Ooo, also knitwear - that's something I started with in my personal transition/journey and really gave me a softer look as before hand I wore fitted chinos and sweatshirts and a male blazer. Knitwear is also very gender neutral.

Shoes - these are probably one of the most important things as I put an outfit together and looked nice without shoes but all my shoes were masculine and just took from a feminine look, or a gender neutral look to a masculine look. Female flats are probably the best thing to keep a look mix gendered.

Just remember gender neutral / androgynous is very popular at the moment so don't be afraid - when I first started transitioning people knew I was 'gay' but that was the way I carried myself, unfortunately it was natural and not purposeful + I have resting bitch face - but I generally had women and men ask where I got my clothes from (Especially the knitwear)

I can't recommend anything specific as we all have our own style, and age range tends to differ and as I don't know yours I might be completely off the mark but they're my suggestions :3 And I'm also still in early in my journey so I can't say too much as my style is very feminine but not quite dresses yet. (My favourite thing is wrap front blouses and long tops with side slits)

But have a look at: Kpop Male Fashion. Jaden Smith (may not be your thing but it just shows you ideas) Kanye West. Lenny Kravitz (to some extent), Adam Lambert (mostly make-up)

Ps. I know how you feel about the curly hair - my hair is more wavy / loose ringlet textured at the mid to bottom but flat at the top -_- which shortens my hair by a lot specially how it layers together and straightening lasts about 30 minutes aha!

Also another thing about hair - if you don't have a problem with it - dye your hair - my hair growth has seemed to increase since dying it, as I think it stripped all the dead hair, and the dye I got was full of moisturizer :laugh:

Wrote quite a bit, sorry! But my ideas are more feminine sided but I think incorporating bits and pieces can definitely androgynous yourself up - it worked for me.
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KarynMcD

Quote from: Amber42 on July 12, 2016, 03:31:03 PM
As for clothes, I'm wearing a lot more skinny, tighter pants,

Wider cut legs work too. Pull on pants, pants without belt loops, patterns/fabrics that men don't typically wear, etc.
Check out "NY and Company's" pant section on their website for ideas.
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Amber42

#5
Thanks for the ideas.   I'm in a male dominated industry and although I've pushed some boundaries, I'd have to still want to stay relatively male during the day...but maybe push it a bit more than I have been.  Also at night, i could try to push even further.

I sure hope you are right about my hair.  With the humid weather it's frizzy and it's becoming an Afro craziness!  LOL.  I guess I need to be patient...I hope

I like the idea of the knits.  I will have a look at options at stores next time I'm shopping.
I did see a nice looking girl wearing wider pants today.  It was very hot out but her outfit with the wide pants really looked great....hmmm not sure if I can pull that off.
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Tama-Ann


In a male dominated industry it's harder, I agree. I haven't experienced it myself as I've been in education all my life, and still in it. Seems like 1/4 of your life is education ;_; - But I digress - it depends on the men around you, as there's places where men tend to dominate the profession but are very open minded.
So wanting to stay male during the day, that rules out make-up! So forget I mentioned that!

I had more ideas when I left the forums, and was waiting for your initial reply before I posted again!
I have a top from about 2 years ago, that is very androgynous as it exposes a little bit of chest, but can be covered up, because it's a long sleeve shirt, that has a VERY long thing that can be wrapped into a scarf - the design is very much Cowl Neck(Hooded in google gives better results) and its typically a unisex worn thing. Also MOST round neck tops that show the chest are typically feminine looking.

Also look into Selfridges A-Gender; I tried looking on their website but everything was still 'mens' or 'womens' and couldn't find an 'A-Gender' section apart from the inspiration and why they love it (but I'm UK based might be different in different countries) <- they're a bit pricey too.

Also Zara clothing choices in women section is typically quite non-gendered (apart from blouses and so on)

Good Luck!

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Deborah

My hair has been growing 19 months and while it has gotten pretty long it is just now starting to be controllable to some extent.  It takes a while.


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Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Amber42

Quote from: Tama-Ann on July 15, 2016, 04:08:23 PM

I have a top from about 2 years ago, that is very androgynous as it exposes a little bit of chest, but can be covered up, because it's a long sleeve shirt, that has a VERY long thing that can be wrapped into a scarf - the design is very much Cowl Neck(Hooded in google gives better results) and its typically a unisex worn thing. Also MOST round neck tops that show the chest are typically feminine looking.


I actually know the type type of shirt you are talking about.  My wife had something similar.  The fall merchandise is making their way in the shelf...ill take a look for something like that.  Good idea.

Also, funny you should mention round neck shirts.  I just picked one up at Costco of all places.  There was a table with mixed clothes they had reduced.  It is a T shirt style but nice fabric and I didn't realize how wide the round neck was.  It looked unisex before trying it on.  Once it was on, it's definitely feminine.  I will try to incorporate that somehow.  :-)
Quote

Also look into Selfridges A-Gender; I tried looking on their website but everything was still 'mens' or 'womens' and couldn't find an 'A-Gender' section apart from the inspiration and why they love it (but I'm UK based might be different in different countries) <- they're a bit pricey too.

Also Zara clothing choices in women section is typically quite non-gendered (apart from blouses and so on)

Good Luck!

I'm not familiar with Selfridges.  I checked the website and as you said, it has the typical male/female sections.  Are you saying in-store they have an A section?

We do have Zara here in Canada.  Not a store I typically go into but I will give it a try!  :-)

Thanks for the ideas


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Lyric

Quote from: Amber42 on July 17, 2016, 09:04:15 AM
I'm not familiar with Selfridges.

Selfridge & Co. is a department store chain with just a few stores in England, but they do have a web store that seems to ship outside Britain. There was a great BBC TV series shown on PBS in the states called Mr. Selfridge that told a probably heavily fictionalized version of how the store started in the early 1900s.
http://www.selfridges.com/

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life." - Steve Jobs
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Tama-Ann

QuoteI actually know the type type of shirt you are talking about.  My wife had something similar.  The fall merchandise is making their way in the shelf...ill take a look for something like that.  Good idea.

I'm glad you know what I mean, aha - hard to explain! But I like how it looked when I was discovering myself as it wasn't feminine enough to be stared at but still gives the whole softer appearance,

QuoteAlso, funny you should mention round neck shirts.  I just picked one up at Costco of all places.  There was a table with mixed clothes they had reduced.  It is a T shirt style but nice fabric and I didn't realize how wide the round neck was.  It looked unisex before trying it on.  Once it was on, it's definitely feminine.  I will try to incorporate that somehow.  :-)

If it's low - you could always put on a polo/button up shirt which is typically more masculine looking but once again I go back to knit wear - the soft fabric will give a 'unisex' vibe. But it depends how deep the circle goes, as length is fine as it can hang on shoulders but if it's deep cut, it's probably really feminine looking :3
(I'm unclear on URL posting so if you just google 'SLUB SPECKLED ROUND NECK JUMPER') you'll see what I mean by a quite universal aesthetic with circle necks :3


QuoteI'm not familiar with Selfridges.  I checked the website and as you said, it has the typical male/female sections.  Are you saying in-store they have an A section?

I think that the section was an exclusive last year, much like this year they have 'Shakespeare' as their inspiration - I did some digging! I wasn't sure unfortunate they didn't turn it into a main point.!

Also another store to look at is French Connection - I found it today as I was looking for an example for you - their female (aside from dresses) section is quite blurred in terms of gender.
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