Wow, Mariah, Thanks so much for sharing a difficult journey in such a personal way. Who knew a couple of photos could be so powerful. If I can find some old ones of me, maybe I will do the same thing, 'before' and 'after'. Especially now.
Artesia, I ignored myself for a loooooong time. I had GRS in '91, but tried to suppress it after that. Impossible.
When you said
QuoteFunny thing, until I could admit to myself that I was not a man, I couldn't force myself to do the exercise necessary to lead a healthy life. Now I am exercising every day, and eating a little bit better, old habits die hard. Since my goal is to become more feminine, I have gotten the strength to do this. Self loathing, even when hidden from oneself is a killer.
I recognized me there so strongly.
During the last couple months I felt the same thing. I started HRT again, and as soon as I stuck my patch on, everything seemed better. Sure, just sticking that patch on was a large psyche, but only 7 days in and already my body is changing. Breasts, fat distribution, emotions [better!], joining a gym, better outlook, more confidence, and this is before I decide if I am going to present as female or not. I imagine soon it will be nearly impossible to
ignore me as a woman, but time will tell!
Thank you both so much for sharing your insight
