he ask me to live with him

[Wild Flower]

There is this guy who for the past few months I felt attraction to him. He would say straight things but his body language wasnt as straight to me. I think hes bisexual. Okay I wanted him as my boyfriend secretly so I would try to rearrange the universe to make this happen... Work near his office more often and such. We have one month left together.

Today he caught me offguard because our relationship thus has been platonic.

He said, "You should live with me in Colorado... Me and my brother are going to buy a house and it has six rooms. I care a lot about you and I want you to consider. I know its going to be tough once you leave the military" he said an off comment about living with him in Colorado but today he was serious.

Now I dont know what his intentions are because its been platonic... But he did say I was pretty once and early on he had flirty bodylanguage.

I havent transistion but do you think he wants me to be his significant other?

[KarynMcD]

I don't think you are reading him correctly at all.
Things aren't what you think or hope they are.

[Angélique LaCava]

Ur reading to much into it.u said u think he's bisexual.... So does he see u as a man or woman? Because if he saw u as a woman he wouldn't be bi.... Also Men can be pretty too. He didn't  ask u to legitametally live with him and by that I mean sleep in the same room. He said they have 8 rooms so he could just care for u In a friendship way and is wanting u to just be a  roommate....unless he is bisexual, then u might have a chance. Only way to find out is invite him over to ur place and have alcohol involved or invite him to go to a bar n get drunk together n see what happens. Obviously u act feminine so in nature he would take the roll as a man so if he finds u attractive and wants u the way u want him with alcohol he will make the first move. U could make the first move too if ur feeling brave, worst that can happen is he says he's not gay yada yada yada.

[Wild Flower]

I dont know what he sees me as... He obviously sees a guy because I havent transistion nor talk about it but he told me today that I will always be beautiful in the context of me saying Ill gain weight if I eat. And a month ago he said I was pretty.

But I havent disclose him to anything and I dont know his intentions are. I have a "girl" friend who I hang out with almost every night and I kind of blow him off to hang out with her... I think we just need a one and one talk to figure it out.

I dont know why he cares about me so much but he did told me I should run with him in the mornings cause hes lonely and what not.

[Angélique LaCava]

I dont know what he sees me as... He obviously sees a guy because I havent transistion nor talk about it but he told me today that I will always be beautiful in the context of me saying Ill gain weight if I eat. And a month ago he said I was pretty.

But I havent disclose him to anything and I dont know his intentions are. I have a "girl" friend who I hang out with almost every night and I kind of blow him off to hang out with her... I think we just need a one and one talk to figure it out.

I dont know why he cares about me so much but he did told me I should run with him in the mornings cause hes lonely and what not.

so if he sees u as a man and has no idea u want to transition then why r u interested in him? Wouldn't u want someone to see u as the gender u want to be.

[Wild Flower]

so if he sees u as a man and has no idea u want to transition then why r u interested in him? Wouldn't u want someone to see u as the gender u want to be.

Its so hard to transistion... I am afraid of rejection by the world and my family.  I dont care what gender any man sees me as (besides male.. Trans, woman, intersex doesnt matter)... As long as he loves me in a feminine way. And if hes physically attracted (in my opinion) and if he has a good head on his shoulders (like he treats me well and can support us). Ideally hes near my age. And he fits all those. But really I rather have his love than his support/money, like if he loses his career it will be okay because I would love him.

Hes super Christian and doesnt drink... Which is why I question if hes okay with transgender. He even bought me a Christian book.

I thought it over... If hes willing to call me beautiful and pretty without shame then we need to talk about if hes bisexual.

I know hes attracted to women... And i think i fullfill the emotional need he wants from me. Hes been rejected by women and I think thats why hes curious about me because I genuinely care about him.

Even his coworker started singing "under the sea" when I walk into the room. Coincidence or not... I feel like Ariel. Its like theres a connection and I am waiting for an answer... And yet I have no voice to tell him since I am afraid of his reaction.

He even told me I smell good one day and would touch my nose my shoulders and my thigh once.... But i brush him off. I even rejected "dates" with him to hang out with my "drinking buddies"... By dates I mean just hanging out.

Okay. The next time I see him I will suggest to talk to him in private since hes not afraid of calling me pretty. And I am ruining a possible ltr with him by being afraid... And if he rejects the idea of bisexuality then I will go.

Hes not gay. I am not a man in the inside. But I know hes attracted to me from me on the inside.


----
As far as him being rejected by women... I could understand; he doesnt have an amazing career or amazing looks (he is slightly above average), and hes eccentric. Which I am okay.... Cause i think hes hot.

[Rhonda Lynn]

Wild Flower, you can never really know what another person is thinking or feeling. You can only try to know yourself. You said

I am not a man in the inside.

Perhaps he is sending you signals that he is attracted to you. OTOH, you might be reading more into it than what is there. He might just be flirting with you or being friendly. Furthermore, no matter how pretty you are, not all guys are ready to have a relationship with a TG. Trust me on this.

I think that moving in with a man that you're strongly attracted to while keeping your identity secret is a good way to set yourself up for frustration and disappointment. At some point, you'll desire a romantic relationship but this can't happen unless you reveal yourself to him. Therefore, if you decide that you can't reveal yourself, then moving in with him is probably a bad idea. If you want to move in with him and possibly be in a relationship with him, then you will need to open up with him. If he rejects you, and says that he was never interested in you except as a friend, it is much better that you know that now.

With regard to transitioning, I don't know how you present yourself. Whether you are full male or androgynous. Some find that they can live their lives presenting themselves in a less masculine way. People may end up reading you as gay, but they can think what they like.

Hugs,
Rhonda

[Wild Flower]

Thanks.


Two days ago, he invited me to watch movies but I turn it down for today instead. I wasnt comfortable bei g obviously friend with him in public and he wanted my attention and I had a lot on my mind. At the party as I was talking he wasnt listening to my explaination on why I wasnt available for that night....

Today we (and a friend) agreed to movies and he didnt show up... And i think its because he felt rejected by me. At the party I heard him tell his friend "im leaving".

I know I am thinking too much... But i think i may have blew my chance with him.

I guess Im just afraid of appearing gay in public but he is probably the most important guy at the party.

[Wild Flower]

Lol.

I just found out his age. 34 (through coworkers). He lied about his age (saying he was 24), and I was trying to put it together...It makes sense now, in a weird way... He may be desperate now without a wife or girlfriend and no kids yet. And maybe thats why he was into me... Hes into me because hes running out of time and I may be one of the few who like him for him.

Yet... Even though he may not be the ideal guy most women would want, I think I am in love with him and could accept his flaws.

Any man who calls me beautiful is a man im willing to wait for ....

And even if he doesnt want me sexually right now, it doesnt matter, he touches me like he does, and treats me well *enough*.

I am going to take up his offer to live with him... At least for a short while.

[Angélique LaCava]

Lol.

I just found out his age. 34 (through coworkers). He lied about his age (saying he was 24), and I was trying to put it together...It makes sense now, in a weird way... He may be desperate now without a wife or girlfriend and no kids yet. And maybe thats why he was into me... Hes into me because hes running out of time and I may be one of the few who like him for him.

Yet... Even though he may not be the ideal guy most women would want, I think I am in love with him and could accept his flaws.

Any man who calls me beautiful is a man im willing to wait for ....

And even if he doesnt want me sexually right now, it doesnt matter, he touches me like he does, and treats me well *enough*.

I am going to take up his offer to live with him... At least for a short while.

i don't seeing this end well, but do Wat u want, but don't cry wen he tells u he was just being friendly cause In the first sentance u said he likes u then in the third u said u don't know if he likes u. Ur going off of how he touches u n stuff. Just freaking bring him someplace n ask him.... Stop reading into it n just come out n tell him how u feel n ask him if he feels the same way.

[I Am Jess]

You will never know until you have a conversation with him about these issues.  I wish you all the luck in the world.