Hi everyone,
I am a 19 year (almost 20) trans girl, I transitioned when I was 18 with HRT only. And so far I haven't had any surgeries, SRS or BA.
Before HRT, I always had feminine mannerisms, a feminine voice that never dropped, was petitie and pretty face. Which made my life very hard, because people often couldn't get if I was a boy or a girl, and would ask, be rude or even assume I was a butch lesbian. However, starting HRT, I started passing and at two months nobody would believe I was boy even if I dressed as such. I started getting harassed on the street so frequently that, after year, it has become normal to me (unfortunately). At 6 month mark I started getting remarks by people everywhere how "you are such a pretty girl", "you're very pretty", "you are so gorgeous"... which was quite an ego boost but I now find it gets old fast. Society values looks over anything else in a girl. It makes me feel like a pair of walking boobs and pretty face.
Most guys who approach me or act interested in me are committed to other girls. And I always refuse going out with them. I tell them all the same: I do not go out with men who have GFs. But somehow I find only jerks approach me. It seems nice/shy guys don't really like to approach at all, or are intimidated to do so. I honestly don't want a man who's all about going out at night, drinking, smoking, having sex bam thankyou. I want something more meaningful, but all I attract is losers. And I ask myself, why? Am I doing anything wrong? I feel so vulnerable sometimes. It wasn't easy getting here, and I did most alone. I just want someone to share who I am with. Someone caring, nice, funny, who can keep interesting conversations. But it seems my supposed "good looks" only attract trash. Or perhaps it's a woman thing. More likely the latter.
Is it really possible find a man who fits this "bill" and who understand our condition?
