First of all, this is without any makeup?? Girl, you are beautiful!
Also, you are not being stupid. Anxiety, fear, self doubt, and the like can really muddle our thoughts and turn us against ourselves. Allow yourself to feel these negative feelings, but in a way to understand why they are there now. You say that you've been full time for a year, perhaps this milestone - albeit super positive - is scaring you? Whatever the case, there is always reaching the other side, sometimes it's this anxiety that proves we are doing exactly what we are supposed to do.
You're wonderful, don't forget that <3