"Female energy" doesn't really describe it, I fear. I mean, I get where you're trying to go, but it might help to get to the nitty gritty of what "inner beauty" actually is, how we develop it in ourselves and how we see it in others.
QuoteOLDER AMY: All those boys chasing me, but it was only ever Rory. Why was that?
YOUNGER AMY: You know when sometimes you meet someone so beautiful, and then you actually talk to them, and five minutes later they're as dull as a brick? Then there's other people, and you meet them and think, "Not bad, they're okay." And then you get to know them, and their face just sort of becomes them, like their personality's written all over it. And they just turn into something so beautiful.
BOTH: Rory's the most beautiful man I've ever met.
In the Doctor Who episode
The Girl Who Waited, there's exactly this discussion of the difference between outer beauty and inner beauty. It takes place between two versions of Amy Pond, one who is about 60 years old after waiting around a barren medical facility, and her earlier self from thirty-six years previously, who is startlingly and stunningly beautiful in her physical appearance. They talk about their husband Rory, who is barely average in physical looks, but whose personality they agree is "beautiful." The whole episode ends beautifully when Older Amy sacrifices herself for the younger couple.
So what makes us beautiful in this spiritual sense? It's an important question, I think, because for all I go on about the material reality of assimilating, transition is ultimately a spiritual journey (after all, our interiority is really all we have to go on).
"Happy, content, in the zone," as Sandboxed put it, and "working hard to suppress my ego" as Warlockmaker says, and I agree with both. What we find beautiful
in other people is their ability to make other people happy. This takes a form of egolessness. This "selflessness" is necessary for effectively engaging our empathy -- we focus on how
other people are feeling, not ourselves. Which means, ironically, we can't be obsessed with how we ourselves are coming across, about whether we're "passing" or not. Self-consciousness isn't congruent with selflessness. For me, rectifying my physicality was a prerequisite for letting go of that self-consciousness.
Physical transition isn't the end of the process, it's only the beginning. Then the real work begins.