An update on me...

[SadieBlake]

Just a reminder you're human dear. The weeks post surgery are tough. And certainly you didn't need a misguided friend butting in :-/

[Kendra]

I'd block them from phone and email, immediately and permanently.  Same as any other spammer.

Your future is great and too precious to waste with people who destroy.  Spend time with your good friends.

[Megan.]

No one deserves that kind of treatment,  especially such a wonderful soul as yours at a moment like this. I can only echo the others,  damaging people should be removed from your life, don't let them take any more of your precious energy. X

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[Michelle_P]

Thanks. I won't be interacting with that person for a while, if ever. They are in therapy but I don't think they are being honest with the therapist. I was supposed to go to a session with them next week, and this started with them telling me that was off. Afraid of something and pushing me away.




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[LizK]

Its a horrible when something happens that sends you all the way to a place you thought you had left a long way behind, it would seem this person really hit you below the belt. What kind of person does that to someone recovering my major surgery? No someone who cares about you.

I am glad you are feeling better today and hope over the next few days you will start feeling even better. I have been hearing more about this post OP depression, I hope for your sake it lifts soon. Taking care of yourself at the moment seems like the smartest thing to do...Glad to hear your recovery is going well.

[Michelle_P]

Thanks, Liz.   I had this same response after my last cancer surgery (melanoma) when they whacked me with propofol.  The same stuff was used on me this time, plus other goodies, for about 7 hours. Then a few days with a low morphine drip, and a Percocet >-bleeped-<.

I got off the stuff ASAP, but I've been expecting this. It hit just under 4 weeks, like last time, and I suspect it'll be flushed out within a month.  Depression is sneaky stuff though. Hard to prepare for.

I'm so glad I've got my friends. They really are helping me.


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[p]

I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling with depression. Keep those friends close! Big hugs, Michelle 

[Michelle_P]

Good old Scientific American has an older article on some of the weird things general anesthesia can do to us:

Although anesthetic drugs have been around since 1846, many questions remain as to how exactly they work. To date, the strongest evidence suggests that the drugs are effective in part because they bind to and incapacitate several different proteins on the surface of neurons that are essential for regulating sleep, attention, learning and memory. In addition, it seems that interrupting the usual activity of neurons may disrupt communication between far-flung regions of the brain, which somehow triggers unconsciousness.

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/hidden-dangers-of-going-under/

There's likely a bit of "pump head", the fuzziness and recall problems associated with general anesthesia, in play in my head as well. This should also dissipate over time.

While I am having these problems, in all honesty they are minor, although they do affect my thinking.

I am very pleased with my surgical outcome, the lack of significant pain, and the feeling of finally being complete, myself!  And of course, how skinny jeans and pencil skirts fit now!



I'm recovering well, easily hitting my 5,000 steps/day limit, dilations still at full depth (although temporarily getting harder, as the bits of fibrous scar tissue on the "seams" try to contract on weeks 4-6), and am very active within my limits.

Far more to be happy about in my life than sad!  (Stupid depression. Go away, already. You lose, I win.)

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[p]

I look forward to reading that article, Michelle. You look so lovely in your leggings! Glad to see that you are keeping perspective and a positive attitude. 

[Laurie]

 Hi Michelle,

  I saw your latest culinary offerings and they do indeed look good, but better yet is the statement you made about being happy. I hope that happiness lasts a long long time.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[Megan.]

Looking fab Michelle, and doing excellent,  which is lovely to hear. That baking looks truly truly scrumptious!

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[Michelle_P]

Looking fab Michelle, and doing excellent,  which is lovely to hear. That baking looks truly truly scrumptious!

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Thanks, Megan. 

Although fab?  I don't think I qualify until I at least look as good as Diana Rigg at my age did, or even better, how she looked in the late 60s!  ❤️❤️❤️❤️




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[Laurie]

 Avenger quality. Wow Michelle that is an awful high bar. Diana Rigg had a body I drooled over. I doubt many here would even know of her. Seven of Nine might be the younger set's body idol.

Hugs,
Laurie

[Kendra]

Michelle you do indeed look fab, absolutely.

Diana Rigg - heck yeah.  I craved everything about her when The Avengers was on early re-runs in the early 1970s. 

[davina61]

Old enough to see it the first time around and I wanted to look that good in a cat suit and seven of nine, now Michelle in a cat suit YES

[steph2.0]

Old enough to see it the first time around and I wanted to look that good in a cat suit and seven of nine, now Michelle in a cat suit YES

Oh my gosh! Emma Peel and Agent 99. I was so envious...

[Michelle_P]

We held a Transgender Day of Remembrance ceremony during both the service at our Unitarian Universalist church today.  The short ceremony noted both the significance of the Transgender Pride flag, and the increasing number of murders of transgender persons, particularly transgender women of color.

We're just people, human beings trying to live our lives in peace as our authentic selves.  For the offense of existing, others murder us in ever-increasing numbers. 

https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=z-1Icz29_jU




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[Drexy/Drex]

Way to go michelle....😊

[Michelle_P]

Way to go michelle....😊

Thanks, Markie.  (Just noticed the avatar.  Rocking the Industrial Goth look, there! 👌 )

My best friend, Nancy, and I probably sunk 40-50 hours into that thing, from scripting, getting the 10 foot Trans Pride runner together, finding balloons that met everyone's standards, to rounding up enough aisle walkers to cover both services.  Nancy deserves credit for driving, and Carol Sue for her video work in turning this out quickly.

On Monday Nov 20, I did another TDoR ceremony, this one at Todos Santos plaza in Concord, CA.  We had about 50 people there, and about 20 at a follow up reception.  The ceremony was hosted by Rainbow Community Center in Concord and Mt. Diablo Unitarian Universalist Church.  I did a 5 minute speech at this one relating the TDoR, trans community, and faith-based communities.  It was really a call to action for the coming year.  That was followed by press interviews.

The NBC Online stringer, Gillian, did a great job covering the service.  The singing and shots are beautiful.  Then I show up. Ms. Sound Bite...

https://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/I-Know-Who-I-Am-Transgender-Advocates-Memorialize-Lost-Lives-in-Concord-459121683.html


We're working on forming a social LGBTQ group for the county, based out of our church as a safe place (no preaching!  Just food and fun!). Kickoff for that is Dec. 2.  That gets followed by more educational presentations like my "Gender: Beyond the Binary" talk (On YouTube, search for "MDUUC gender").

[Michelle_P]

I had a lovely Thanksgiving with friends.  A local couple I am friends with had recently moved to a new home, and invited me to join some other friends at Thanksgiving there.

It was a wonderful experience sharing the meal, what we are thankful for, and just having fun with a couple rounds of Alias and Cranium.   

There were some interesting and more personal impacts there as well.  One couple Included a man who had transitioned several years ago, causing the couple to be ostracized by our local lesbian community.  My own transition left me ostracized from my family, not welcome at holiday events.

My friends were happy to welcome all of us into their home.  When I left, one of them walked me out to my car, briefly mentioned the other couple's situation, and then asked me to come back next year, and said "Welcome to our family." 

I spent a few minutes crying in the car before I drove home.  Stupid estrogen.


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