An update on me...

[SadieBlake]

Blessed estrogen?

[Kendra]

> When I left, one of them walked me out to my car, briefly mentioned the other couple's situation, and then asked me to come back next year, and said "Welcome to our family." 

Absolutely precious. 

[Michelle_P]

I heard from my son, finally.  He's just a typical dude most ways, has trouble communicating. He was in the area visiting my ex and the extended family for Thanksgiving.  He called yesterday.   Now he's with me, snoring in the next room. [emoji4]

Yay!  We went to see a movie last night that he wanted to see (Thor: Ragnarok - stuff gets blowed up real good) then hit a really good burgers and bar place.

We came back to my apartment and baked cookies for dessert. [emoji56]

We'll hang out today until I take him to the airport later.

Nice surprise to end the week. [emoji56]


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[Laurie]

That was a great surprise Michelle. I'm glad he came to spend time with you and have cookies and milk. Just don't use up all the chocolate chip cookie dough.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[Megan.]

There is not one bit of that sounds bad, brilliant in fact, happy for you. X

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[Michelle_P]

That was a great surprise Michelle. I'm glad he came to spend time with you and have cookies and milk. Just don't use up all the chocolate chip cookie dough.

Hugs,
  Laurie

Oops...

I'll make more !




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[Laurie]

Oops...

I'll make more !




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  So there's no hurry for me to head south.

  I hope you are taking some time to smell the roses Lady.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Michelle_P]

  So there's no hurry for me to head south.

  I hope you are taking some time to smell the roses Lady.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Yeah.  I won't have another six pound batch of cookie dough ready until tomorrow afternoon.



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[p]

Wow, your Thanksgiving sounds really lovely--what a nice couple who hosted you and welcomed you to the family! So glad to hear you got to have a visit with your son as well. Big hugs!

[Drexy/Drex]

 Thanks ...you did  a stellar job  Ms sound bite 😆
"
The NBC Online stringer, Gillian, did a great job covering the service.  The singing and shots are beautiful.  Then I show up. Ms. Sound Bite...  "

[Michelle_P]

I'm dealing with some rough stuff.  Really rough.  Medical care issues, and a nasty catch-22.  No details until I get the arbitration and litigation lined up, but I am not a happy camper.  Nothing to do with my recent GCS, which I am happy about.

Throw this on top of the (slowly fading) post op depression and my head keeps going to pretty grimdark places.  I keep having thoughts of detransitioning, that I'll never be right.  I know this is nonsense, but this is the sort of rubbish that depression and external forces are inducing.

I'll get through this somehow.   I suppose the good news is that I think that if necessary I can turn this to have a significant impact for others.  You'll know when I do this, of course.

[Justarandomname]

I'm dealing with some rough stuff.  Really rough.  Medical care issues, and a nasty catch-22.  No details until I get the arbitration and litigation lined up, but I am not a happy camper.  Nothing to do with my recent GCS, which I am happy about.

Throw this on top of the (slowly fading) post op depression and my head keeps going to pretty grimdark places.  I keep having thoughts of detransitioning, that I'll never be right.  I know this is nonsense, but this is the sort of rubbish that depression and external forces are inducing.

I'll get through this somehow.   I suppose the good news is that I think that if necessary I can turn this to have a significant impact for others.  You'll know when I do this, of course.

Wow Michelle, I'm so sorry to hear that.  I totally can empathize and understand the op-depression and the thoughts of detransitioning.  It's like when you are down, depression kicks you down even further but you're already at a point in your transition that many would kill for. 

I hope you are feeling better as the day goes on.  I find the best way to stave off depression is by keeping myself busy.

[Laurie]

Michelle,

  I'll be rooting for you winning on all counts in the concerns your let us know about here and those you haven't told us about. Being depressed sucks. Want some of my new pills? Just kidding they tell me I need them for myself.

Hang in there Michelle, you're one of my role models.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[KathyLauren]

Oh, wow, Michelle, sorry to hear that things aren't good at the moment.  Hang in there.  If anyone can get through this, you can.  You are an inspiration to a lot of us.

[Megan.]

I'm dealing with some rough stuff.  Really rough.  Medical care issues, and a nasty catch-22.  No details until I get the arbitration and litigation lined up, but I am not a happy camper.  Nothing to do with my recent GCS, which I am happy about.

Throw this on top of the (slowly fading) post op depression and my head keeps going to pretty grimdark places.  I keep having thoughts of detransitioning, that I'll never be right.  I know this is nonsense, but this is the sort of rubbish that depression and external forces are inducing.

I'll get through this somehow.   I suppose the good news is that I think that if necessary I can turn this to have a significant impact for others.  You'll know when I do this, of course.

Oh no,  sry to hear the camping is not happy [emoji853].

I'm glad the post-op downer is fading,  but if you need to dump please PM me. Big hugs! X

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[Michelle_P]

There's a song I ran across a while back.

"I may fall", Jeff Williams with Casy Lee Williams

...

There's a moment we'll make a decision
Not to cower and crash on the ground
The moment we face our worst demons
Our courage found

When we stand with friends
And we won't retreat
As we stare down death
Then the taste is sweet

<chorus>
I may fall
But not like this: it won't be by your hand
I may fall
Not this place; not today
I may fall
Bring it all, it's not enough to take me down
I may fall

I like this sentiment.

[Michelle_P]

Some days bring nicer things.  My older daughter and her SO are in town, for a sort of Thanksgiving/Christmas visit.  They're staying with my ex at the old house, which has plenty of guest room space.

They both came over to see me, and we all went out to dinner at an old Italian place.  Lots of good conversation, good food, a great shared experience. 

[Laurie]

 Well I bet that brightened your day some. And you can't beat good Italian food.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[p]

I am sorry to hear about your lingering post-op depression and the medical issues you are facing. I know that everyone can get depressed, but I think we trans folks have lots of especially dark places we can go w/r/t our transition, appearance, identity and presentation that does not present quite as much of a minefield for our cis friends. I hope that if it comes to litigation that it can at least have a positive impact for others as you suggested--even facing personal challengers, you always seem so thoughtful and community-oriented. Visit with your daughter sounds lovely. Sending big hugs!! 

[Drexy/Drex]

I'm dealing with some rough stuff.  Really rough. 

Sorry to hear that ....it will pass just hang in there