An update on me...

[Michelle_P]

I believe that you put this line in with humor intended but it is a great question. Many of us have been wrapped up with transition for a while and then at some point it gets past that to living life. And I think that we realize at some point, while looking back, that we may have actually gotten to where we were seeking to go without noticing it. And then what? I know that for myself, life is just awash with possibilities/opportunities beyond what I had ever expected, and those in just day to day living as I always needed to be.

Tia Anne

I think you got exactly my intent.   With humor, I'm wondering if I've actually reach my goal, and have perhaps been so busy that I didn't quite notice.  Certainly, it was around here somewhere that I had dreamed of someday being.

Of course, this is hardly the end of the story.  This is merely the end of the beginning.

[Anne Blake]

Michelle, I do believe that we have gotten to the point where in front of us is a new journal, a blank storey book just waiting to be filled with wondrous tales that our kids and grandkids will be loving every minute of and will be amazed at what grandma was able to do with her life!

Tia Anne

[Michelle_P]

Chapter 2...  In which Michelle lives her life...   [emoji6]

I'm still healing from the little excision surgery 5 days ago, tending to my right forearm and avoiding heavy lifting.  That has cleaning the old apartment and unpacking the last of the new place mostly on hold.  I've been tidying stuff up, taking care of little details, and generally puttering around.

Much of the depression I had been putting up with is dissipating, and I'm getting more exercise in.  So, every day in every way I'm getting better and better...  *twitch*   *twitch*

I'm playing around with a few new recipes, and trying out some cookie and salad variations.

I do have a few events coming up.  Yet another lesbian group meet up on Saturday, for a local hike, and a reunion of gals who have taken one of the Conscious Girlfriend classes on Sunday, so I continue to try and have a social life. There's supposed to be a meditation class tonight that I'll head off to in a little while. 

I attended a little shopping event for trans women Saturday, which a local social support group hosts with a consignment shop in the area.  The owner and one of her friends help the gals pick out items for their wardrobe and provide advice.  It's a nice event for those who aren't full time, and for those of us just looking for a little safe low pressure socialization and shopping.

A good part of my wardrobe came from this shop.  [emoji4] The skirt and white leather jacket were both great finds.


Oh, I snapped those when I got home from running errands and getting lunch.  I did my morning exercise loop around town, got my double espresso macchiato, headed to Target to pick up some odds and ends, grabbed lunch at Panera, did a little more shopping, and came home.  That's pretty much how I looked today running around town.

[p]

I am glad to see that you have already resumed the breakneck pace of your usual social life! That consignment shop idea is so wonderful--I am going to look into bringing something similar to our local pride center. I am glad to hear that you are healing well and getting over some of that lingering depression. Big hugs!

[Laurie]

Dang it Michelle,

  Not one word of progress with my room. Gheeze Lady, where are your priorities? You probably haven't done a thing more on it to get it ready. Yeah yeah I know,"the doctor said..." uh huh Are you really going to use that one? Heck you have time for meetings and hikes and shopping...

  You did get that nice jacket and skirt though. That bargain may have been worth the time you could have spent in your new home. I'll overlook that one I suppose.

  As for the hiking and socializing, well you can do that stuff after the home front is in order can't you? I mean really you need a social life too?

  Depression is fading? Hey what's with that how will you be able to relate to me if you are feel good? Oh alright I suppose it is a good thing. (mutter mutter)

  Were those chocolate chip cookies? Now tell be how you are going to dunk them in milk with ice cream in between them? What up with that?

Glad you are rehabilitating well, Michelle, even if it is at the cost of getting my room ready

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Shy]

Well look at you girl, sorry i'm a bit late to the party but congrats are in order I hear. Really happy for you and wish you all the happiness for the future.
Hope the post op is going well for you, I haven't had time to catch up fully yet but glad to hear the depression is lifting.

Peace and love and all that good stuff,

Sadie

[Michelle_P]

Today is a special one, of sorts. This is my Legal Rebirth-Day, if you will.

One year ago today my identity was formally recognized by the Court, and I was permitted to change my identification and government records to match who I am.

From a year ago:

I think I just set some sort of record.

My petition to the Court requesting the government acknowledge my existence was heard this morning at 9:00 AM. The judge had a couple of other name change petitions this morning, and called us all forward by name, to be seated at the Petitioner and Respondant tables. Yes, I heard "Michelle Jean Paquette" called for the first time in that courtroom.

He then signed the documents, passing them to the clerk, who did something with the computer system and then handed us the documents. He told us to take them downstairs to Filing, get them recorded, and get certified copies. (Nothing unexpected there.) In at 9:00, and out with my court order recognizing me at 9:08.

I had the order filed at once, and got my certified copies, embossed with the court seal and stamp, and signed by the Clerk. By 10 AM I was home. I put the car away, grabbed my prepared materials, and added the court order copies. Time for a little walk to the Civic Center.

At 10:30 I was in the Post Office queue, and by 11 (they ARE the post office...) I had posted a packet to the Department of Vital Records, by priority mail, that should arrive Monday. That one requests the birth certificate under the new name and gender, and seals the old certificate.

At 11:10 I had checked in at Social Security and was in their queue. At noon, my Numident record had my new name and gender inserted. Off to the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV).

At 12:15 I was in the DMV queue. At 12:30, they rejected my paperwork, due to a blank 'Case Number' field in the doctor's form. Kaiser doesn't seem to actually have case numbers, after calling them, but my Medical Record Number would do. Yay cellphones. OK, I fill that in and get back in the queue. Eventually a really nice older woman calls my number, and we chat while she gets the system to open up the name/gender change screens. A manager has to sign the forms, and then unlock the screen so the clerk can enter the new information. At 2:08 PM, I have the traditional bad photo taken, and I am out the door, new license on the way, old license sealed.

Five hours from gavel strike to being done with the Birth certificate, Social Security card, and Drivers License. The SS and DMV cards will be here within 2 weeks. The birth certificate takes a few months, but everything is filed and in process before any administrative rule changes might happen.

Time for a lunch break... Or something...

Over the moon? Elated? Excited? Oh, you bet! I am definitely going to celebrate this event. I don't know how, just yet, but it will happen.

[KathyLauren]

Happy re-birthday, Michelle.

[Michelle_P]

Dang it Michelle,

  Not one word of progress with my room. Gheeze Lady, where are your priorities? You probably haven't done a thing more on it to get it ready. Yeah yeah I know,"the doctor said..." uh huh Are you really going to use that one? Heck you have time for meetings and hikes and shopping...

  You did get that nice jacket and skirt though. That bargain may have been worth the time you could have spent in your new home. I'll overlook that one I suppose.

  As for the hiking and socializing, well you can do that stuff after the home front is in order can't you? I mean really you need a social life too?

I'm slowly unpacking and setting up Lauries's Room,  just can't lift much without tearing stitches.  I slide the boxes over, and lift what I can out of them.  Tedious, but it is getting done.

The jacket and skirt are ones I've had about a year now, actually.  In a recent shopping trip, I did score a leather maxi-skirt, and a really nice silk top, so I am definitely still shopping.  Hey, I have to look nice for company, right?   

The hiking is for fitness, and the socializing is for sanity.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.   

  Depression is fading? Hey what's with that how will you be able to relate to me if you are feel good? Oh alright I suppose it is a good thing. (mutter mutter)

Oh, don't worry about that.  It's not like I'll FORGET what depression is like.  That never happens, although sometimes I wish I could forget it.  Painful memories there...

  Were those chocolate chip cookies? Now tell be how you are going to dunk them in milk with ice cream in between them? What up with that?

Well, that's the real trick, isn't it?  I think I have to get the ice cream formed into little discs and chilled to around -30 degrees F.  Then it will handle being pressed between cookies and being dunked a little better.  I'll have to run an extensive series of experiments to develop a good solution.

I may need help doing this...

Glad you are rehabilitating well, Michelle, even if it is at the cost of getting my room ready

Hugs,
   Laurie

Every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better.... *TWITCH*  *TWITCH*

[Michelle_P]

The lesbian group 'MeetUp' event went well. We did a 5 mile hike while discussing which science fiction books reflected current times in various ways, and then went for a late lunch at a local Persian buffet place in Berkeley.  No big fuss over the transgender woman, fortunately.  The leader had a few trans-tangential questions at one point in the hike that I tried to address, but nobody else raised the issue.  There were the usual funny looks as we were getting together before the hike, of course.

I was looking forward mostly to the hike and socializing a bit, but also got some interesting book ideas.  I'll probably do other events this group comes up with.

Tomorrow I have that 'Conscious Girlfriend' reunion meetup.  It looks like there will be six of us there.  I've a few items to cook up prior to the meetup, and am looking forward to a little more socializing.  (Laurie is probably cringing at this...)

[SadieBlake]

Wheee! Yay for meetup things, I went to a queer poly women's thing recently and was well received, met fun female loving females and generally had fun.

[Michelle_P]

In fact, I had ANOTHER meetup-like thing this afternoon, a get-together of several lesbians who have gone through a Conscious Girlfriend class.  I found that two of us are signed up for the big 12 week class starting next week.  Should be fun taking this with someone I know, if only through a few meetups.

Today's event had just 6 of us, doing a potluck and three hours of discussion on dating, being conscious of our feelings, red flags, and similar such topics ("How to avoid bringing the U-Haul on the second date...").

My heirloom tomato salad, teriyaki chicken, and cookies were a big hit.  I'm going to make some gal a terrific housewife...   

[Laurie]

  12 Weeks??? I have to wait twelve weeks for you to have time for me? I'm glad to see you getting out and socializing Michelle. How is that arm doing, healing good? It looks like you are getting back into  the "Adventures in the Life of Michelle" again. Busy busy busy.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Michelle_P]

  12 Weeks??? I have to wait twelve weeks for you to have time for me? I'm glad to see you getting out and socializing Michelle. How is that arm doing, healing good? It looks like you are getting back into  the "Adventures in the Life of Michelle" again. Busy busy busy.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Oh, I can do that class from anywhere I have a phone or computer to get into the sessions.  It's not at a physical location, so I don't have to take off and neglect my friends or leave my dear sweet honey badgers behind.

The arm is healing well, and isn't slowing me down too much beyond the inability to lift stuff.  Of course that has slowed down my unpacking and getting that room ready.  It will be good to go next week.

Today is pretty busy.  I met a friend for coffee this morning, went to an interfaith service for Martin Luther King Day, attended a protest march, and I'm getting ready to go out to dinner and to a meetup with some other transwomen.

I just got off the phone with an organizer for the county Womens March, and I'll be doing a short speech at Saturday's march.  We were working out where I'll be in the lineup.  I come in right after our youth speakers on racism and immigration issues.

So, how's your Monday?

[Laurie]

  Today wasn't a bad day. Getting news about an hour and a half ago of an uncle passing away tonight wasn't good news though. We weren't close any more but still there went another one. I think that leaves two uncles still alive and two aunts out of 8 of Mom's siblings. I don't think there are any on Dad's side of the family left.

[Michelle_P]

Laurie, I'm sorry you had that bad news about your uncle. Death of someone within our family is hard no matter what.

I didn't have that large a family, and when my uncle passed away after my parents were gone, that had some significance to me.  It was effectively the Old Guard passing away, leaving ME as the oldest living family member in my late 50s.  That was a very disquieting feeling.

[Laurie]

 Yeah Michelle,

   The old guard is passing into history. I was really bothered about not being able to pass on the family name after it became apparent my son would never have kids of his own. I am the last of my branch on the family tree. It took me awhile to come to terms with that. Or at least I think I have.
  I do have one uncle that will probably out last me on my Mom's side. He is only a year older than I am.

  Anyway enough of thoughts along that line.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[p]

Michelle,

I have been keeping up with your (many, many) goings on and am curious--how did the speech at the march go? I so admire all that you give to the various communities in which you take part. Wishing you continued peace, joy and strength. Also, a happy belated re-birth day! Big hugs. 

[Michelle_P]

Michelle,

I have been keeping up with your (many, many) goings on and am curious--how did the speech at the march go? I so admire all that you give to the various communities in which you take part. Wishing you continued peace, joy and strength. Also, a happy belated re-birth day! Big hugs.

Oh, that speech won't be until Jan 20th.  I'm still writing it!  It will wind up at maybe 120 words, so I need to make them count.

Thanks for the happy re-birthday!  That one brought a smile to my face.  So glad to have the legal stuff out of the way.  I may try to get my DD-214 revised as well.  Thats an odd one.

Thanks!

[Michelle_P]

Home from the doctors, and the stitches from the excision on my forearm are gone!  The removed tissue had "clean margins" meaning that the doc got it all.  Good riddance!

That removes the weight restrictions, so I can get back to work on Laurie's Room, er... the guest room. Let's see...  eyebolts... check!  Suspension frame... check!  Hoist... check!  St Andrews Cross... check!   Just amazing what IKEA carries in the local store...

I've got my little speech ready for the Contra Costa Women's March, I think. It runs a minute thirty-five on a dry read, should meet their two minute request on stage OK. They have like a dozen speakers for a 30 minute rally. I bet the politicians go WAY over.

Fun weekend ahead!




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