Femininity in males

[ghostbees]

I have long hair, shoulder length, been having it even before I got on hrt, I said banzai, just do it, even though I look like a feminized native American guy, shrugs, eh.

Oh I see.
Once I got so angry with myself and literally cut chunks out of my hair! I had to get it shaved off - I looked like Phil Mitchell 🤣[emoji23]


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[Elis]

I usually get mine cut at a unisex one and they're usually on point still a bit pricey. Should I grow my hair out?? I dunno whether to leave it or get it cut MmM


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I think your hair looks good. If it makes you feel comfortable and happy then I see no need to change it. I dislike these articles you get anout how trans men can only get certain haircuts to 'pass'. It's more important to be happy with your gender expression and appearance.

[ghostbees]

I think your hair looks good. If it makes you feel comfortable and happy then I see no need to change it. I dislike these articles you get anout how trans men can only get certain haircuts to 'pass'. It's more important to be happy with your gender expression and appearance.

That's true!
I think I might get it cut as it looks untidy will post pics after![emoji39]
Hopefully it shall look good if not it's the right weather for hats[emoji23]


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[ghostbees]

Ok so just thought I'd share when I was done removing the makeup from Starbucks toilets I couldn't stop thinking how incredibly masculine I look and I felt a little sad too, I felt that the makeup had been an experience (even if I did get heckled) and then this random dude said "makeup is just a face mask you wear"
I just froze feeling incredulous like did this dude think people naturally look made up


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[Elis]

Ok so just thought I'd share when I was done removing the makeup from Starbucks toilets I couldn't stop thinking how incredibly masculine I look and I felt a little sad too, I felt that the makeup had been an experience (even if I did get heckled) and then this random dude said "makeup is just a face mask you wear"
I just froze feeling incredulous like did this dude think people naturally look made up


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I feel that sadness too whenever I wear something uber masculine. Wow that dude was an a-hole. More people need to realise makeup is an artistic expression and a way to enhance the natural beauty of someone's features. Most people don't wear it because they feel they need it to cover up what they look like. Btw; don't want to sound patronising but it's seriously amazing you wore makeup out in public. No way could I do that.

Also looking forward to pics of your haircut . I'm studying to be a barber so it always interests to see different hairstyles on people.

[ghostbees]

I feel that sadness too whenever I wear something uber masculine. Wow that dude was an a-hole. More people need to realise makeup is an artistic expression and a way to enhance the natural beauty of someone's features. Most people don't wear it because they feel they need it to cover up what they look like. Btw; don't want to sound patronising but it's seriously amazing you wore makeup out in public. No way could I do that.

Also looking forward to pics of your haircut . I'm studying to be a barber so it always interests to see different hairstyles on people.

Gosh it must be hard for you!im not really sure how to explain the sadness I just I dunno...
Don't worry you're not sounding patronising at all! Thank you btw,, I think the hardest part is getting out the door and telling yourself that what people say don't matter and ignoring the a holes

Yeah I think people see it as fake since it does 'cover up' some stuff like spots,discolouration etc but yeah I agree with you that everyone should be allowed to use it no matter what gender (am I missing the point?)


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[Kylo]

I dislike these articles you get anout how trans men can only get certain haircuts to 'pass'.

Yeah, and I don't think it's true. I've seen long haired ftm and provided the face angles are there or the facial hair they look fine.

I've cut my hair down a few times before transition prep but I literally feel sort of naked with extremely short hair. I don't do very long hair either. It's nearly always somewhere between five inches and just above shoulder. I'm not a fan of the hairdresser so I like some leeway time between going there... if I had to go every 2 or 3 months it'd drive me nuts.

[Elis]

Gosh it must be hard for you!im not really sure how to explain the sadness I just I dunno...
Don't worry you're not sounding patronising at all! Thank you btw,, I think the hardest part is getting out the door and telling yourself that what people say don't matter and ignoring the a holes

Yeah I think people see it as fake since it does 'cover up' some stuff like spots,discolouration etc but yeah I agree with you that everyone should be allowed to use it no matter what gender (am I missing the point?)


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I don't know how the explan the sadness either... It's feels like I'm losing or missing something. I wish I knew how to use makeup so I could choose whether to look like a fem man or a masculine one more easily.

Yeah that's what I try telling myself. Plus I've gotten better over the last few years of trying to look as tough as possible while out so noone will mess with me.

You're not missing the point at all

[Elis]

Yeah, and I don't think it's true. I've seen long haired ftm and provided the face angles are there or the facial hair they look fine.

I've cut my hair down a few times before transition prep but I literally feel sort of naked with extremely short hair. I don't do very long hair either. It's nearly always somewhere between five inches and just above shoulder. I'm not a fan of the hairdresser so I like some leeway time between going there... if I had to go every 2 or 3 months it'd drive me nuts.

For me I couldn't have my hair that long. The time washing and drying it would drive me nuts

[Kylo]

I can see why... I wash mine every day but don't usually blowdry it. If you're on a tight schedule it's a pain in the butt. But I don't usually have to be anywhere early in the morning so I got time to let it dry out while I'm doing whatever it is that I do every morning. Short hair dries in like 5 mins, loved that when I had it short

[ghostbees]

I don't know how the explan the sadness either... It's feels like I'm losing or missing something. I wish I knew how to use makeup so I could choose whether to look like a fem man or a masculine one more easily.

Yeah that's what I try telling myself. Plus I've gotten better over the last few years of trying to look as tough as possible while out so noone will mess with me.

You're not missing the point at all

That's exactly how I feel omg I'm sure there are some good makeup videos on YouTube, I think there is a lot.

Keep encouraging yourself if you can [emoji4]my rule is when it stops feeling fun stop but yours maybe different!

Ah good I hope I don't sound preachy oop


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[ghostbees]

I can see why... I wash mine every day but don't usually blowdry it. If you're on a tight schedule it's a pain in the butt. But I don't usually have to be anywhere early in the morning so I got time to let it dry out while I'm doing whatever it is that I do every morning. Short hair dries in like 5 mins, loved that when I had it short

Doesn't washing it everyday strip essential oils from your hair?

Ah man I love how little my hair takes to dry sometimes I miss long hair but it was a pain in the butt to get rid of shedding omg


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[Elis]

I didn't realise other people felt that sadness I do; good to know I'm not crazy  .

[ghostbees]

I didn't realise other people felt that sadness I do; good to know I'm not crazy  .

We're all mad here[emoji12]it helps


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[Elis]

We're all mad here[emoji12]it helps


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I use that saying all the time

[ghostbees]

I use that saying all the time

Heh! It's true though [emoji23]


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[Kylo]

Doesn't washing it everyday strip essential oils from your hair?

So they say, but I've done it for the last 16 yrs... hairdressers usually mention how healthy it looks, and I'm thinking, what? I never do anything to 'look after it'. But I don't blowdry it. I heard blowdrying's not great for hair too.

I used to shed tons, now I really don't. Longer it is the more it gets easily pulled out, I guess. I don't mess with mine much, it's got a life of its own anyway. Stupid mop.

Just remembered back to when I was like ...13 or something when I did have long hair.... again because I wasn't much into caring about it or how long it got, those knots and how painful it was to brush that crap out. I'm sure I just got scissors sometimes to get rid of the bad ones. Totally forgot how irritating long, long hair is.

[Angela Drakken]

It's kind of weird that despite being a trans man, I'm pretty feminine. I guess there isn't one way to be male but I feel it definitely turns a few heads.
Anyone else had this problem?[emoji21]
,
Loki


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Iunno, sometimes they're good problems to have. Even when in my boy clothes, I always fell more into a gender neutral category, or feminine. Just rock it any way you can, like you said there's no right or wrong way of doing it.

(boy mode, kinda stepping outside my comfort zone sharing these.. Y.Y)

[Jacqueline]

My first post on here, so I might mess it up somehow. Heads up.

I like this topic. I'm pretty feminine, and expect myself to be even more openly so as my transition progresses. I'm currently as far back into the closet as Narnia, so I'm not comfortable expressing my femininity much. Ideally, I'd like to be a pretty boy rather than a huge, hairy macho beefcake. One day.

You shouldn't feel weird about it, though. We're all cute boys here.

Welcome to the site.

Sorry for interrupting the thread.

Thanks for being so positive.

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With warmth,

Joanna

[Elis]

Iunno, sometimes they're good problems to have. Even when in my boy clothes, I always fell more into a gender neutral category, or feminine. Just rock it any way you can, like you said there's no right or wrong way of doing it.

(boy mode, kinda stepping outside my comfort zone sharing these.. Y.Y)

You look great . Only wish I was able to look that androgynous.