Gender Clinic question.

[JMJW]

I'm still in a holding pattern, waiting for the appointment from the NHS..

Anyway I was wondering if it's best to outright ask them if I can get HRT or to just ask for guidance and trust in whatever they have to say. I don't know if that would bias the therapy to a predetermined conclusion.

Anyway everytime I'm in the city I pass by there and look up and wonder when I will be able to go up those steps. Yesterday my dysphoria felt like it was gone completely! But then I realized I had been drawing a woman for like 30 hours. (not 30 hrs in a row I stopped to sleep)  It is possible for me to not transition, I would just have to give myself over to art completely. And be drawing and writing and colouring every waking moment. To be honest part of me even wants to, but it's super obsessive. But it does greatly reduce my desire to change myself. It's living in a fantasy reality instead of the real world. Which ironically I need to write an essay on for college. I'm just waiting out my final project. College will end in June and I will feel a lot more free.

I'm no longer dressing up to go to college because I want to use that extra time for my work and because in that same area I saw grown men running around with wooden weapons used as clubs fighting each other in the street. I'm just going to ride out the next eight weeks doing nothing else but work. 

[DawnOday]

I am sorry for your difficulties but I agree. June is not that far away and college, can set you up employment wise. Get that out of the way. I am proud of your decision to matriculate. When you are done, everything is going to work out for you no matter what you decide.

[Dena]

Your appointment will go something like they will ask you a bunch of questions. If it doesn't come up in the questioning, they may give you a chance to ask questions. If so, ask then. If they don't ask if you have questions, ask near the end of the session.

They will want to learn about you before giving you HRT and asking before they are ready to answer the question will do little good. On the other hand, you should know what the game plan will be before leaving the first appointment.

[Kylo]

I'm still in a holding pattern, waiting for the appointment from the NHS..

Anyway I was wondering if it's best to outright ask them if I can get HRT or to just ask for guidance and trust in whatever they have to say. I don't know if that would bias the therapy to a predetermined conclusion.

If you know what it is you want, no harm in asking for it when you get that appointment. By the time you get through the initial few appraisal appts. with a psychotherapist to assess your case, you'll have several opportunities to confirm what you want, and a lot of time to mull it over between, I guess. I had to wait almost 2 years and during the whole time they asked me if I wanted HRT up until I saw the supervising Dr. who got my GP to sign off on a permanent prescription for it. I guess consistency in your desires for what you want done looks best to them.

I'm no longer dressing up to go to college because I want to use that extra time for my work and because in that same area I saw grown men running around with wooden weapons used as clubs fighting each other in the street. I'm just going to ride out the next eight weeks doing nothing else but work.

Where was that?

[JMJW]

It was in Clifton, Nottingham. More specifically by the number 48 bus stop near the Co-op store.

The thing is I go back and forth on if I should have HRT or not as I have no concept of what it's like to be on it. I keep thinking maybe I can get by without. I'd have to try low dose first. That's for sure. Right now I'm really bad at keeping up with anything real world related. My head is in fantasy land most the time.

[Kylo]

Oh yeah, Notts. My mum just finished up a job contract up there and moved to Sheffield. Never said it was that bad, but then... she never did live in the inner city. Heard it's pretty rough. (Coming from a former Scouser, lol)

[JMJW]

I think the only places worse are London and Birmingham. But it was my fault in a way the bus was only a minute away so I thought it would come along and I'd be gone, but these buses never stick to the clock one minute away typically means three. I should have and normally would have moved alot earlier.

I edited my previous post. 

[Kylo]

Initially I thought the same thing, it might be different for E but the number of people who say it helps with mood and clarity have to be onto something... makes it just a basic monthly prescription expense you could quit any time if you decide you didn't need it. Might as well say you want it so you don't have to go back and jump through those hoops again. Personally the HRT has made me feel 200% better, it's worth more than all the rest of it just from the perspective of controlling negative thoughts and emotions.

[Shy]

Hi JMJW

I'm in the same holding pattern as you right now, pondering the exact same question.

Yes, art helps for a while with the dysphoria. I think because it's a form of self expression that has no restrictions imposed on it by society. Essentially your free to be yourself on canvas.

I'm just going to turn up to my meeting without any expectations. I don't know the process and want what's right for me, not what has worked for someone else.
Yes HRT seems the next logical step for me, i'm ready and open to the idea. But I may be asked questions I haven't thought of yet, given insight I haven't realised about myself. I think it's a process, so being honest and open seems the best way forward.

Best wishes,

shy

[davina61]

well waiting for my referral to come through from Notts, god knows how long this will take? Will try my GP to see if they will prescribe HRT patches and t blockers but have no hopes. Getting over dysphoria by dressing up and felling sexy after work but fed up with shaving ever time I shower, need that HRT.