I said it before, but trying to question anybodys validity as transgender is a big grey area where you're pushing people away, if you truly think someone isnt transgender you should explain to them how you understand transgender people are and educate them on what it means to be transgender, and let them decide for themselves in the end how they experience it and whether or not they accurately feel they fall under the transgender umbrella in some way.
I posted a response awhile back offsite to someone who said being transgender is not physical, many people can be transgender, many different genders exist (Which I disagree with and explained my reasoning as politely as possible, being a bit of a touchy subject):
"Gender is the sex which a person experiences which may be different from their physical self assigned at birth. (It is not an emotion, a badge, or an expressive label). This does indeed have to do with physical abnormalities in growth and development whether it's neurological, chromosomal, or physical (secondary sex traits or primary sex traits). When it comes to human identification of self or others, the signs and tells we have are based on distinct traits that are typical for the majority of species of that sex. This is why when people look at someone theyre subconsciously looking for biological aspects that mark humans of either sex (although some contain traits of both and are ambiguous to pinpoint). Vice versa, a transgender person, who has traits of the other sex which they were not born with, typically seek to transition by completing the process of physically transitioning going as far as the individual may typically need.Gender isn't just an idea based on gender roles or the word "boy" or "girl", if there was no sense of physical dysphoria or social dysphoria (Again, not based on gender roles but based on internal identity traits), then it would just be a word and carry no meaning
Regarding "third gender" which is a canonical term in India and existing in various forms in other countries, it isn't literally a third (or fourth or fifth) gender, but a catch-all term for gender variant people, as in people who haved mixed traits that dont fall under typical physical traits of a sex. Intersex people are part of an "other" category, they are the gray area between male and female. There are various combinations of traits which make up intersexuality or a person's gender experience, each combination of such isn't a brand new gender. Even among intersex individuals a lot of them still identify as male or female based on the dominant traits they feel.
The thing about the LGBT community and the modern gender movement is it started by opening people up to fight against discrimination, but as the popularity of the community went on the rise it becomes part of a fashion statement to not just be cis/straight. The thing about gender and sex is it is NOT a way to be different and describe yourself, it is just what you are, and isn't any more special than someone who is cisgender heterosexual. Nobody chooses what they are. The bandwagon effect causes a rise in people to take upon labels and expressions which may or may not apply to themselves for the sake of being open and descriptive of who they are and fitting into a community.
As an example, For most transgender people, being transgender is not a source of pride or happiness. It's a source of pain. A source of pain that stems from the discrimination, the hate (from self and others), the dysphoria (the crushing physical and social dysphoria of being confused and sad in a body and neurological role that doesnt make sense), the overwhelming despair that there are aspects of yourself that you cannot be 100% male or 100% female. Being transgender is NOT happy. It is NOT proud. So where does the pride come from with these people? It comes from people who learn to accept the fate they were given, it comes from those who have the strength of character to push on and control what they can in life, and it comes from those who learn that they can be happy in a world where it is confusing to be born in a state of disparity. The "neat little boxes" you're referring to aren't random and escalating labels for people to invent to BE different for the sake of different; they are trans* people, agender people, and genderfluid people that are all part of a complex combination of what is based on physical traits (always, always, always physical in some sense), in the way that modern people are struggling to understand a minority that is and always has existed breaking out of the boxes people place on us means breaking out of the little known fact that males and females and all things in between do not come in all the same form and we are allowed to be different and embrace what makes us different from the majority rather than live in shame.
I know I'm sounding very inflammatory and argumentative about people's gender expressions so where am I going at this point? I'm not necessarily meaning to put down others for gender expression, and I'm not saying who out there is the "true" transgender person. What I'm saying is a lot of people who are openly accepting are suffering from misinformation based on a rapidly expanding base. This misinformation causes a lot of dissaray in terminology and understanding of what sex and gender is based on actual facts, not just emotional states and reasoning. My main idea I think is there needs to be that information for young people out there. Many young people are struggling to understand themselves, whether its gender roles or dysphoria or loneliness or lack of confidence. In the end, I'm not one that can tell anyone who or what they are, that's a decision that they should be 100% honest to themselves to discover.
I dont know how many people are going to read this entire thing and agree with me, or read this entire thing and go "Oh! I didnt know that! I understand now!" or "I totally disagree and this is a very negative view that I believe is wrong of this person", etc."
