So I had my first appointment with a gender therapist this morning, and it went VERY well!
I saw this particular therapist once when I was 12, but my mom got scared at the mention of puberty blockers and never brought me back.
But now that I'm 18, I decided to go back. I'm fully responsible for my own medical decisions, and after so many years, I know it's time to start my medical transition.
The woman was very kind, and even though I had a slight anxiety attack as we spoke about my trauma, the session went very well. She informed me of the risks involved in testosterone treatment, and we spoke about future decisions (top surgery, hysterectomy, etc.) that I will make during my transition. She was lovely and assured me that I'm not any less of a man just because I interrupted my social transition by living as a female for a year. In fact, she told me it was actually a mature and wise decision, because now that I know living as female doesn't work for me, I'm much more solid in my identity.
We brought my mom in towards the end, as I wanted her to be involved. My mom was worried about visiting this particular therapist again, but the therapist was kind to her and reassured that her fear for my safety and grief over losing a daughter was valid, while at the same time informing her that she had no reason to fear and that my transition will benefit me in many ways.
In a few weeks I'll have a referral to an endocrinologist, and I'm super excited!
