The GoodIt has been an eventful days since I last posted. My last post talked about the issues we were having around our bathroom and my troubles with my HRT Dr. Since then the bathroom has been completed, it wasn't without issue but we got there in the end. Since my last conversation with my HRT Dr I have made a few decision the first of which is that I will be seeking a second opinion. I called to make an appointment with a well-qualified Endocrinologist and was told that I was in luck as there had been a cancellation this week on Thursday. As luck would have it I was also able to get an appointment with my GP enabling her to do the referral straightaway for me. The only appointment I could get my other HRT Dr was not until the 23rd of this month which of course was very frustrating.
I also finally received a call back from the woman organising my health insurance offering me a slightly better deal than she had when I rang. Based on this new deal I have decided to proceed and my new health insurance will come into effect as of the 26th of this month. I have a years wait period before the insurance will pay but that is to be expected as it is a pre-existing condition. I have contacted the hospital where I will be having the surgery to ensure that I have adequate coverage but am still waiting on confirmation of this.
Not long after organising my insurance I received a call from the HRT Dr who I've had the issues with. She called to say that she had noticed that I had not books another appointment until later in the month. She went on to say that by the time of the appointment date she now felt that my E levels would be low enough (they will be <100) in order for her to insert the pellet. She is going to send out a prescription for the new pellet but has specified the pharmacy that I need to get the pellet compounded in. The pharmacy that she wants me to use is a "packed lunch and a water bottle distance" from where I live. Just making seeing her even more difficult.
The BadLast Friday I received a text from my father requesting a Skype call with me. This is highly unusual as it is normally myself that is making a request for a call. So I placed a call and we began to chat about all sorts of the usual stuff. We talked about what him and my mother had been doing, the interactions they had had with other members of the family including my brothers. What things had been happening in their life if any and this was reciprocated by my father asking similar questions of me.
For the first time in I don't know how long, he asked me how my younger brother was who lives in the same city as me here in Australia. This is not something he usually asks but has done on rare occasions. Considering the bust up him and I had a few weeks ago this is very co-incidental. He asked me had I seen my brother and I said no and I was not likely to. He then asked why and when I said I didn't wish to discuss it he got really bent out of shape with me so I capitulated and explained to him my reasons, things between him and I became a little strained. You know when you speak with someone and they have strong feelings on a particular subject which is in direct opposite to how you feel, you have a choice to either get into an argument or let it go for a more appropriate time. In this case I chose let it go at this time because it was obvious we were going to have an argument. It was also obvious that my father has some quite set ideas when it comes to political correctness and my name and pronouns fall under this category. He automatically started to attack me on the basis that the falling out between my brother and I was about political correctness. I had a somewhat different view
What I think was worse for me is that he indirectly defended my brother. In the end I spelt it out to him and said that it is very simple and easy to be an ally to me, to my face, it is however, a far more difficult prospect, when you are faced to do this when I am not around. That those people I call my allies are able to be my ally even when I am not there and this is the true mark of a real ally. In the end I don't think he understood much of what I was talking about or maybe just didn't want to know but I told him that my door is always open and my brother knew where I live if he felt the need to apologise and come back into my life. I made it abundantly clear that I would not approach him again.
The Somewhat SadToday I had an appointment with a clinical psychologist I have been seeing now for two years. We discussed in very general terms how things have been for me over the last six months and what the next 12 months held for me. She is going to be one of the people that write my letters for surgery. She was not entirely sure whether she was able to do this as she thought she could only write top surgery letters and I don't need a letter for top surgery but has promised that she will follow this up and if she is unable to she will certainly put me onto someone who is able to write the second letter.
I explained to her the issues I had had with my HRT doctor and that the HRT doctor had said I probably require some psychological help if my gender dysphoria is troubling me and not rely on the hormones to fix my GD. My psychologist just about fell off her chair in exasperation saying that that is half the reason we prescribe HRT to relieve gender dysphoria. The condition is a physiological not a psychological condition but as a result of this she then got on her phone and found me an appointment with yet another endocrinologist who specialises in transgender health. This particular Dr actually specialises in gender dysphoria so I guess I really couldn't ask for a better type of doctor.
Once again Alex Jolley showed me a huge amount of warmth, compassion and care. This was a bittersweet moment for me, the end of my need for professional psychological help but also the loss of a confidant, ally and professional friend. I ended the session by giving her a hug and thanking her for saving my life. I know that last part may sound a little dramatic but it is actually the truth. When I saw Alex over two years ago I was on the verge of giving up and giving in.
So I guess I have reached a milestone in my transition as neither my primary psychiatrist nor my primary therapist think I require any further psychological help in dealing with my transition and are both happy to write the letters for surgery without seeing me again.
The end of one chapter and so the beginning of the last act is at hand, the "remaking" of "Richard"
The Current State of HRT PlayI currently have an appointment this Thursday with a new doctor, next Thursday with a new doctor and finally the following Monday with my old HRT doctor. So far the second "Thursday doctor" works for Shine SA and will see me at no cost to me. My other two appointments will cost me somewhere around $300 each appointment. So I'm going to cancel my first appointment on Thursday and postpone this till well after I have seen my current HRT doctor. I feel that the doctor I am going to see at shine SA being an LGBTQI doctor might be the best option that I can take without burning either of the other doctors.
Phew...I really should do these a bit more often....
