I wanted to give a
final update the situation with my brother after our meeting on Wednesday. I was pretty upset after the meeting and for the following couple of days. I am still mulling over what was said but suffice to say I have a far clearer idea of what has transpired since I first came out to him. There are things I suspect and there are things I know for a fact. The meeting itself lasted about 3 1/2 hours.
I was accused of a number of things, none of which was true or even plausible in some cases. It would seem that this has been going on for quite a number of years with him undermining me in several ways. It would appear that he even may have been responsible for "outing" me to my parents prior to my coming out to them in 2015...this would go a long way to explain their odd reaction (or lack of it). It would seem he has been feeding them pieces of information which he may have felt was benign but should have been left to me. Unfortunately the damage is done
I have taken action and have distanced myself from my entire family in order to protect them, my wife, daughters and me from further stress and hurt. When my family impact me in the way that they do it has a flow on effect. I love my family and understand that my parents struggle with me being Trans, especially my mother and Father. When the distress this causes me begins to threaten the relationships with my own family then it's time to limit the possible damage and make some changes
I don't want anyone hurt anymore so I have asked my brother to ensure he keeps things to himself(he won't but I have asked). He said after our discussion he needed to "think about things" before he decided if he wants to have an ongoing relationship with me...he is such an arrogant ass. I do not wish to have anything further to do with him despite what he may decide to do. I will be keeping them all at a distance and unfortunately that also means my extended family as there seems to be some who are upset by my Facebook postings.
I never wanted this and tried for the last 3 years to prevent this from happening have put a number of things in place so that they have very little to no interaction or contact with me in the hope that it will reduce any stress they may have by having to interact with me. There will be no more Skypes, Phone calls or meetings. I will contact them on Fathers/Mother's Day, Birthdays and anniversaries via a card, txt or email but nothing that involves chatting. I can't trust that what I say won't me misinterpreted and blown up like so many of the things my brother accuses me of.
I am and always have been one to give people the benefit of the doubt however this is now over and I will not be speaking to them of it again.