MtF Stealth mode - Transition possible?

[NotSure81]

Overall, I want to transition. I want to start hormones. Sure I have my days and moments where its a resounding "no transition", but my "yes transition" days far exceed my "no" days. However has anyone done mtf transition stealthily for work reasons? Everyone's body and experiences are different but I'm curious to what others have encountered or know.

My main concern is the breasts. I've read that the nipples get really sensitive and there is some budding in the first few months. Would binding during transition affect growth or cause problems?

Also I'm in a very physically demanding trade and I'm *always* having to lift heavy (75+ lb) items daily and I know E lowers muscle mass. I'm already a weak guy (always have been), If I continue my physical work-load is it possible to maintain much of my strength. As much as I have to do the work, I'm assuming I could maintain much of my strength as its a daily all-day activity.

I also have a bit of a gut and I fluctuate around the 190-200 lb range. Would losing it now be preferred to trying to lose it while on hormones? I have a hard time losing weight or gaining weight. I only lose weight when I'm sick and don't eat *anything* for 5-8 days.

I don't think my work is trans friendly, and Ohio offers zero protections for LGBTQ people. I want to transition and keep it low key. If/When I find somewhere else more accepting to go, which there's no telling how long that will take which is why I'd like to try to start now rather than say, 4 years down the road for instance. Are there other changes I should expect or be prepared for?

Oh and dry skin... My hands are sandpaper. My hands get so dry that I have a hard time maintaining grip on specific surfaces (cardboard, glass, plastic sheets, etc). I have to dampen my hands with water before I can carry these items. I can also scratch my girlfriends belly and back without using fingernails and sometimes my hands just scratch too hard. I've tried hundreds of products long term (months) to try to help my hands. Any heavy duty recommendations for hand care lotions or creams?

[Denise]

You asked a lot of questions at once, let's see...
Lose weight now.

You will be surprised what doesn't show under a loose shirt.  I'm pretty small/skinny and easily hid A cup beasts with zero difficulty.  Just don't wear tight shirts.  I found that the nipples were erect most of the first 2 or 3 months, but that's not unusual for guys at times.

If you keep up the 75 lbs lifting you should be okay.

Dry hands etc.. You can spend $$$$$$ or do what I do and by the large size Vaseline intensive repair.  Use it a few times per day.
On the face I use neutrogena with SPF 50.

Transitioning and the speed of changes depends a lot on your genetics.  Use the next year to lose the weight, see a therapist and talk to your doctor.  You have time.

[Niki Knight]

Overall, I want to transition. I want to start hormones. Sure I have my days and moments where its a resounding "no transition", but my "yes transition" days far exceed my "no" days. However has anyone done mtf transition stealthily for work reasons? Everyone's body and experiences are different but I'm curious to what others have encountered or know.

My main concern is the breasts. I've read that the nipples get really sensitive and there is some budding in the first few months. Would binding during transition affect growth or cause problems?

Also I'm in a very physically demanding trade and I'm *always* having to lift heavy (75+ lb) items daily and I know E lowers muscle mass. I'm already a weak guy (always have been), If I continue my physical work-load is it possible to maintain much of my strength. As much as I have to do the work, I'm assuming I could maintain much of my strength as its a daily all-day activity.

I also have a bit of a gut and I fluctuate around the 190-200 lb range. Would losing it now be preferred to trying to lose it while on hormones? I have a hard time losing weight or gaining weight. I only lose weight when I'm sick and don't eat *anything* for 5-8 days.

I don't think my work is trans friendly, and Ohio offers zero protections for LGBTQ people. I want to transition and keep it low key. If/When I find somewhere else more accepting to go, which there's no telling how long that will take which is why I'd like to try to start now rather than say, 4 years down the road for instance. Are there other changes I should expect or be prepared for?

Oh and dry skin... My hands are sandpaper. My hands get so dry that I have a hard time maintaining grip on specific surfaces (cardboard, glass, plastic sheets, etc). I have to dampen my hands with water before I can carry these items. I can also scratch my girlfriends belly and back without using fingernails and sometimes my hands just scratch too hard. I've tried hundreds of products long term (months) to try to help my hands. Any heavy duty recommendations for hand care lotions or creams?

Hi Alexis, I have been stealthy for years up until last year.

I do a lot of manual labour on construction sites. I bring in a lot of materials for my crews etc. Our season is just getting started and I have been working a fair bit over the last 3 months on HRT. Big thing I found was to wear a sports bra. I have a few LuLu lemon ones that work well. They protect from rubbing while lifting and if you do graze the nipples it is less painful. I have to always be aware of the girls. As for strength, I still have  what I had before so not much difference yet but know its coming. The one thing I have noticed is my cardio is less than before.

Weight loss big time important. Try to get this under control as it will be a disadvantage to you when you start HRT. Again try to do whatever you can to get the weight down as you will be happier for it.

Its a little different for me, I live in Alberta Canada which is very Trans friendly so I have come out even in the construction industry. Yes I have had a few comments by the usually construction red necks but they don't really have a choice. Im the boss. You can easily be stealthy for the first say 6 months but then the cats out of the bag.

Ok for dry skin. I have a couple other guys that have the exact same problem and they were a bit hesitant to do this but once they did they were appreciative. Grab vaseline and surgical gloves. You can buy these by the box and their cheap. Slather your hands with vaseline and then put on the gloves. You can wear them all night and this will help. The bad side to this is it softens everything up including the calluses  so they may peel off while working the next day. Once you do this for a while you can figure out if you have to decrease the time you have the gloves on.

Hope this helps

Huggs Niki Marie   

[katiemoz]

Hi Alexis, I had the same idea as you!  I wanted all of the amazing affects of hormones and to look in the mirror and see a super model, but to somehow have no one notice:) I started on a low dose in August 2015, and ramped up to full transitional levels by June of last year.  Once I saw and felt the beautiful changes (both mind and body) taking hold, I realized I could not turn around. I was very scared at first that someone might find out (cause it's pretty obvious), but surprisingly, people don't pay too much attention. They have their own problems to worry about.  As time went on, I begin to let my guard down, and honestly, every time I did it ended with an infinitely more positive experience than I had ever imagined. Even coming out to family was surprisingly positive (although it's brought some significant but not insurmountable challenges to my marriage).

I am still somewhat stealth, maybe androgynous, in many work situations, but I present female outside of work, mostly.  I get some funky looks periodically when I'm in male mode, and get mammed periodically (feels good), but as soon as I open my mouth and speak with confidence, any periodic strangeness dissipates. I think that is a really big part of it. People will be nervous around you if you look nervous. They will be comfortable around you if you look comfortable and confident, male mode or female mode. 

Over the past few months, my fear has eased hugely and I'm really at peace. While I could probably act male and hide it indefinitely, its often times more of an effort and more awkward presenting male than female.   I am working up the courage for my next step, which is full time permanent transition and purging of all things male, hopefully very soon. 

Anyway, I really have had a great personal experience with a slow transition, and it gave me time to build confidence with (seemingly) less risk.

Breasts... mine are a B cup but I can hold them back with a tight sports bra. Under Armour makes an awesome one with a super flat band.

Weight loss... yes, it won't get easier! I did Weight Watchers and it worked great. There's an app on iOS that's almost the same, Trac Bites. 

Good luck!


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[Dena]

You have received a bunch of replies to  your question but the hand issues needs one more response. Apply a little dab of neutrogena hand cream before going to bed and after a few days your hands should be greatly improved. I will sometimes use it during the day if my hands get really bad but most of the time it's not required. You should be able to get at least 100 applications out of the tube so be careful not to apply to much. I have been using this product for at least 40 years and it's the best one I have found.

[Fresas con Nata]

Apply a little dab of neutrogena hand cream before going to bed and after a few days your hands should be greatly improved. I will sometimes use it during the day if my hands get really bad but most of the time it's not required.

Yes I use that one too and it works really well. I apply in the morning, around noon and before going to bed. I also use a different one for my feet. Nice to know they (or at least the hands one) have been around for such a long time.

[NotSure81]

Wow, thanks for all the replies. Lots of information to go over.

I'll most definitely start working more on my weight. I don't want it to become an even more huge epic battle for that. I also don't tend to wear any tight clothing outside the house. I only wear some tighter shirts around the house and even then its not often.

Going to try the vaseline since we already have some, and already have the surgical gloves (leftovers from hospice care for my gf mom). I'll definitely pick up some of that Neutrogena hand cream too.

How does one deal with the overly sensitive nipples?

[Daniellekai]

I haven't tried it on HRT yet, but I'm getting there, I'm about 60 lbs more, losing with a daily 12-16 hr fast, and exercising lower body, from what research I've done, HRT may be more effective in feminizing while doing IF (Intermittent Fasting) with exercise, but at the same time estrogen may reduce the weight lost, as IF is harder for women. Exercise while fasting reduces fat pretty directly, while if you eat and exercise you're running on what you just ate, and the fat loss happens later. The reason doing that might enhance HRT is it releases far more growth hormone than you would otherwise, and the presence of enough growth hormone is also necessary for physical changes, and is also the reason older trans folk see less change, as the amount of growth hormone reduces with age. I'm sure it's just one of many factors that reduce HRT effectiveness with age, but for something I'm doing anyway to be potentially beneficial is a boon to my sanity.