MTF Being Noticed By Men

[Maybebaby56]

I am 10 months into HRT and I still present as male but I have noticed that other men are starting to pay more attention to me. At first I thought I was just imagining it. Yesterday myself and my wife were sitting in a bar and a man came up and hit on me right in front of my wife. I mean the whole bit, striking up a conversation, innocent touching for no reason, openly flirting and being overly friendly. Both myself and my supportive wife enjoyed it but it surprised me. Can men sense the changes in me? Has anyone else had this kind of experience?

Nope. I have never had anyone flirt with me and I have been living full-time as a woman for months. Admittedly, I don't go out much.  Every once in a while some one would say, "I like your nails", or "Nice hat", but that's about it.

~Terri

[jentay1367]

Nope. I have never had anyone flirt with me and I have been living full-time as a woman for months. Admittedly, I don't go out much.  Every once in a while some one would say, "I like your nails", or "Nice hat", but that's about it.

~Terri

That's pretty hard to imagine. Do you carry a loaded shotgun around with you, Terri?  That will really dissuade most guys. Not all...but most.

[Maybebaby56]

That's pretty hard to imagine. Do you carry a loaded shotgun around with you, Terri?  That will really dissuade most guys. Not all...but most.

Hi Lisa!

Lol. Yeah, I don't know what it is. I mean it's not like I try to get hit on, but I make friends pretty readily.  The only thing I can think of is I am usually hanging out with someone when I go out, and usually pretty engaged in my companions.

xo Terri

[Arctophile117]

Well, I know I can smell things better than I used to, but yow!  I passed a couple of guys today who smelled strongly, but definitely not good.  So maybe this is a 'your mileage may vary' sort of thing?  Or there are too many well dressed but hygiene-challenged folks in town today?

But yeah, my sense of smell has definitely picked up recently.  One more oddity of life.  As I told the therapist, "This is the first time I've changed my gender, so everything is a novel experience to me."

Oh, yeah, definitely. I get headaches when someone near by stinks. I mean, it hits me square in the face. I wonder if cisgender women get so many headaches because of scent?

I see people looking at me, but it's usually more of a "You don't see that every day,"  ("that" being the instance of seeing someone who's transitioning). However, (hopefully without scaring anyone) the only time I DID get that sweetened tone from a guy was while in a gun shop of all places, while looking at a pistol for defensive reasons.

[Brenda3156]

To be on "the other side"" of things is really fascinating. I am learning a lot about people and how they interact with each other that I had never thought of. I really didn't know all this would come from the path that I have started on and am even more glad that I chose to transition. It is really interesting to have the knowledge that I gained over decades of being a man and to now have a whole new set of things to learn and experience. I never knew this could be so rewarding and fulfilling. If I had I would have done this sooner in life, but no regrets.

[JMJW]

I haven't gone out as the real me that much either so I haven't any experience in being hit on by men, I can't predict how I would react in the moment so I'm not going to try. One has to just go with the flow and see what comes up. 

[Nooms]

Hahaha I just get ignored a lot. Most people, men and women just have the same kinda reaction when they look at me...Dirty tattooed hippy...avoid...avoid...avoidddddd. I loveeee it I don't know what it is about dreads and Para Boots, maybe its the Patchouli Oil scent but hey ho I'm so easy going I just don't care,  lol

xxx
Nooms

[rose]

I'm from Islamic Arabic country I start hrt 2008 but I'm force to dress guys clothes and hide my identity for my safety
But even so
EVERYONE NOTICE ME !
Which can be scary
Guys are always aggressive and harassing me even back then in 2008 when I first start taking hormones

So short answer YES They notice

As long as it's flirting and nice enjoy it

I'm pretty and all that but since I'm in transphobic/homophobic country I never experienced good feedback from guys it's always so sexually and so harassing and aggressive
Even girls are mean specially if I'm prettier than her


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[jessilynn]

Girl, I get it all the time. It's kinda annoying. It's just an undesired effect. I blame it on the pheromones.

I get it because yeah I do present myself as a woman, and yeah like, I am lesbian. I go to my own bar, with my wife, even to dinner, and we both get the googley eyes.

I simply just ignore it, and HONESTLY as much as I DON'T like men (personal issues from my past) I take it as a form of flattery. Just so long as it does not come up to feel like a dangerous situation.

But if this becomes an annoyance to the point where you are personally uncomfortable, speak with the bartender. If y'all are regulars, they will help you out, and watch your back.

[rainecloude]

I honestly wonder if a big part of the changes identified are just a result of trans girls feeling comfortable enough in their own skin that they can finally imagine people being interested in them.

I know for me when I began to feel more comfortable in my own body I was a little less clueless about people trying to engage me.

As someone who used to identify as a gay male being attracted to men or feeling as if men are noticing me isn't unusual so who knows!

[Wednesday]

I honestly wonder if a big part of the changes identified are just a result of trans girls feeling comfortable enough in their own skin that they can finally imagine people being interested in them.

I know for me when I began to feel more comfortable in my own body I was a little less clueless about people trying to engage me.

As someone who used to identify as a gay male being attracted to men or feeling as if men are noticing me isn't unusual so who knows!

OMG, completely agree with you, 1000%! In my case, also my mood (and self-perception at that moment) play a big role in my "awareness' accuracy".

In addition I think men's looks (or ways of looking) are not always that clear. In my experience as a gay boy it was usually easy to figure out, but as a girl (and specially unsure about your looks) it may be a tad more confusing to me (at least sometimes). Most guys looks are usually not that sweet even when they like you very much.

[Nooms]

OMG, completely agree with you, 1000%! In my case, also my mood (and self-perception at that moment) play a big role in my "awareness' accuracy".

In addition I think men's looks (or ways of looking) are not always that clear. In my experience as a gay boy it was usually easy to figure out, but as a girl (and specially unsure about your looks) it may be a tad more confusing to me (at least sometimes). Most guys looks are usually not that sweet even when they like you very much.

This is so true...I think we can often misread a look here and a look there but I guess it comes with the territory. I think personally it's because I am always worried about being "read" and the reactions that may follow so I create the imaginary bad looks when in reality it's just the way people  look at you...normal like lol

[RobynD]

Without a doubt, when you are happier and more comfortable in your own skin, people are attracted to that. A better outlook on life also helps us to respond to those attentions.

[Allison S]

I think it has something to do with hormones and softer appearance that most men are naturally drawn to.

I never had men blowing me kisses, staring, and telling me "I like you" in broad day light on the street and train...

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[krobinson103]

Speaking of lizard brains (HAHA), is it just that I'm so early in (only 3 months), or does anyone else turn into a stuttering fool when they smell a great looking guy walk past whereas before they'd just been like, "hey he smells good"?

Being Bi nothing changed there for me. I've always liked both genders.

[jessilynn]

I honestly wonder if a big part of the changes identified are just a result of trans girls feeling comfortable enough in their own skin that they can finally imagine people being interested in them.

I know for me when I began to feel more comfortable in my own body I was a little less clueless about people trying to engage me.

As someone who used to identify as a gay male being attracted to men or feeling as if men are noticing me isn't unusual so who knows!

You make a very valid point here.

However I do have an update on my previous statement, and I do wonder if anyone has had this happen; My fiance and I were at the closing of our favourite bar... we were OBVIOUSLY a couple holding eachother. And some man comes up and slaps me on the bum. I turned thinking it was a friend, but this guy I did not know. When thebartender had finally noticed, he shooed him away.

So it may be a thing that we just notice more, and this night could have been a one off... but I do notice I get cat called and stuff more often after presenting more as a female rather than just a "cross-dresser."

But VERY good point rainecloude! I love how you worded that too!!!!!!

[Danielle834]

Within months of starting hrt and while presenting as male, I definitely noticed men treating me differently.  Not so much flirting, but treating me more like a girl.  Less locker room talk, speaking more formally and acting more genteel towards me.  I figured I was putting of pheromones.

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