GCS with McGinn (After so many years waiting)

[steph2.0]

I like Moni's current avatar but I bet her next move is to turn 90 degrees to the left.  And then we can see Moni's back.

Get Back
Get Back
Get Back to where you once belonged...

For your gig on Saturday?

Steph

[Laurie]

Oh, comma on you jokesters leave Moaning alone, She's still in recovery and you don't want to push her over the edge do you? It would be more fun to push her over the rail.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[amberwaves]

Hi just wanted to chime in this morning.  First off I never told you congratulations on completing your surgery Moni.  I. So happy for you.  I found this thread to be incredibly useful as a way to conceptualize the endeavor.  I historically stayed away from GCS threads, so my experience there is limited.

I feel compelled to weigh in on some of your recent concerns.  You have been so helpful to so many, self included, by offering insight and experience.  It would be a shame for you to let that fade.  You shouldn't worry about making others potentially feel bad because you had a pretty smooth ride through GCS.  You still struggled to even get there.  Yes, some people have regret and complications and other problems.  Yes some people, likely a minority, will look at your experience as charmed and feel bad about their own struggles.  That is inevitable.  Currently, you just underwent a major life event and figuring out the next step in life.

I often avoid posting much about my transition on here for similar reasons.  From my discovery that I was transgender to now (holy crap it hasn't even been 2 years) my transition has been mostly hiccup free.  My family, with a few exceptions, took things well.  I had no issues getting on hormones.  I got incredibly lucky with how they have affected me (both emotionally and physically).  I was able to transition socially without losing friends or employment.  I am still adjusting to the fact that everyone, including my wife, see me as a woman now (mind=blown).  I am locking down my therapist letters for a surgery that I initially didn't even think I wanted.    I have yet to encounter much overt bigotry, etc.

The point is, I have had a relatively easy time with transition.  That does make me feel a little guilty at times.  Given the shambles and struggles that the rest of my life entails, transition has been easy mode by comparison.  This does not mean you or I shouldn't share our story and our insights.  They are helpful to many who are struggling.  For some who are questioning (particularly late transitioners) it is helpful to know that it's not all bad.  This is why I share.  We cannot be responsible if others feel bad or jealous because of our experiences (provided we're not bragging).  The beauty of the rainbow is that there's lots of colors.

You may choose to become less active and possibly move on someday from Susan's.  That's okay, it's happened a lot from what I can tell.  If that happens it should be because you are to busy living life authentically as yourself, not because guilt.  I realize that I will very likely drift from the site over time myself.  I wasn't particularly active here, but I made some great friends, shared some of my story, and hopefully given hope to a few.  Fwiw, I am glad that you have shared and hopefully continue to do so.

Hugs,
Amber

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using Tapatalk

[HappyMoni]

   Thank you,Amber, you saying that the thread was useful in conceptualizing the process really made me feel good. I enjoyed posting on it, I like the humor on it from all the little rascals around here. I didn't want just factual stuff but maybe some emotions too. The people like yourself chiming in to say such kind things has really blown me away personally.  You are right about the friendships on here. I think so many of us start out at such an extreme place of isolation, it is such a great thing to form bonds with each other. That is maybe my biggest pleasant surprise being on Susan's. We may go on to drift in and out of each other's lives, away from this place perhaps, but the support, the camaraderie is real. I like the idea that I might have helped someone else. The pain this thing has caused me over the years has now subsided to a great degree. When I hear of someone being hurt by some of the same stuff I went through, it bothers me still. That does draw me to be here. Well, that and the abuse. lol

I got a call from Dr. McGinn's office today. The insurance company mistakenly sent my check to them. Deb, the office manager had spent considerable time working to correct this. She is amazing and oh so nice. The first thing she said was to offer condolences for my Mom. Pretty classy!

For some reason, I have had an up tick with swelling the last few days. Maybe from lifting. It isn't bad. I decided that I have seen a bigger butt from the surgery. I thought it might have been from swelling. Now I am convinced that the weight I lost before surgery came back partially as butt. It doesn't feel like my rear end any more. My partner agrees. Now where else can ya talk about your behind getting beefier and get others thinking, "Oh boy, maybe my butt will grow." Only on Susan's. Also, they didn't seem worried about the scar tissue I wrote them about.
Moni

[Jessica Lynne]

Now where else can ya talk about your behind getting beefier and get others thinking, "Oh boy, maybe my butt will grow."

L.O.L ...you're so funny! Who's got a better attitude about this stuff than Moni? Nobody, that's who... 

[Kendra]

...butt wait, there's more!

She slices, with surgical precision!  Just look at that, absolutely perfect.  Nowwww how much would you pay for all this?  Don't answer yet!  If you call the number on your Moni-tor right now we also throw in the genuine Monico Brand Charm Kit for the same low low price!  Andddd that's not all!  You also get a 30 day trial of our Laurie Warning System absolutely free!  Never be caught off guard again!  Not available in Minnesota.

[HappyMoni]

...butt wait, there's more!

She slices, with surgical precision!  Just look at that, absolutely perfect.  Nowwww how much would you pay for all this?  Don't answer yet!  If you call the number on your Moni-tor right now we also throw in the genuine Monico Brand Charm Kit for the same low low price!  Andddd that's not all!  You also get a 30 day trial of our Laurie Warning System absolutely free!  Never be caught off guard again!  Not available in Minnesota.

Kendra, would you believe my full name is Monica Ronco Popeal? Have you seen my Julian fries. Give me a sec and I will cut my boat in half and fix it with scotch tape and chewin gum chewed by hairless monks. Of course, as an extra bonus we will send you 12 vicious Vichyssoises vivaciously vaporizing humans while humming hundreds of horrendous  hymns in harmony. Act now and we will double your order. That's right that's 24, just add shipping and handling. (About now are you wishing you hadn't gone there?)
Moni
It is funny but a week ago I started seeing ads on TV for a security system. The name, 'Moni.'

[Anne Blake]

Kendra and Moni, please stop!!! I am laughing so hard I am about to pop a stitch or three. But it feels so good to see love in action......thank you

Tia Anne

[Kendra]

Add a dash of Lawry's Seasoned Salt to those Julian fries. 

[steph2.0]

Add a dash of Lawry's Seasoned Salt to those Julian fries.

Laurie's Seasoned Salt?

Let's see: Salty. Well seasoned.

Yup.

Steph

[steph2.0]

If I continue to update stuff past this point, is there a danger of making anyone feel bad. My intention is not to say, oh look at my result, ain't it wonderful. I guess my original desire was to tell the story of GCS in a way more that just the X's and O's of the facts. I want to say stuff like at the funeral last night, I had my whole neighborhood around me. I was in  a dress. I no longer had thoughts of me hiding anything. I was Monica, deserved to be a girl in my thick head, and now can not imagine myself any other way. That is an incredible difference that having this surgery meant to me. I have mentally turned a corner in my acceptance. This is one possibility of how one can feel after surgery.

Moni,

I wanted to write about this when you first posted it, but I was distracted by an unwanted house guest named Irma. I'm just now working through my backlog.

I have to admit that as I watch you and the others achieve your goals, I do occasionally feel bad, knowing how very far I have yet to go. But that is more than offset by the joy I feel for you. And even more, the sure knowledge that you bring that it can be done. It's out there for me to work toward, and your success and happiness give me motivation to keep on truckin'. Some day I will post the same type of entry, too.

I'm sure we will all honor whatever you decide on whether to continue here or not, but please don't let concern over hurting others sway your decision. It's a non-issue.

We're all happy that you're happy. Well, all except for that silly Laurie lady. Watch out for her.

Stephanie

[HappyMoni]

Steph,
   Hope you are getting back to some kind of normal after the storm. I had relatives with no power, but they were lucky with no flood or wind damage.
   Thank you for posting your thoughts, Steph.  I am experiencing something I think is related to my procedure, I am extremely tired lately even after sleeping 11 hours last night. It occurred to me that if I post that, I hope there is someone out there that might have seen it before and can say, "How about..." I am grateful to those folks (you know who you are) who have already advised me, calmed me, and slapped sense into me. There certainly is a danger of expressing something that will make someone feel bad, but there is also the possibility of helping to guide someone. I will do my best to be encouraging to others without weirding anyone out. If I do express how good the surgery is, it is because people should know that good outcomes are possible. You certainly want to know it can be good for you. I think I understand why I put "after so many years waiting." in the title to this thread. I waited over 55 years to be congruent, mind and body. That to me says, that after all that time, all that lousey  disphoric discomfort, dreams can come true. It means, don't give up.
   I will defend Laurie here. There is nothing wrong with her that a good 'dog trainer' couldn't fix. Oh gosh, did I just mention her and dogs in the same sentence? What was I thinking?
   I truly hope you will be making that post soon Steph.
Moni
Oh, around Ball'mer, Hon, its Old Bay, not Seasoned Salt, Okay, Verruca!

[SadieBlake]

Moni, in my 3rd month post op I still needed a completely ridiculous amount of sleep and even now, rounding in on 5 months there are days I find if I lay down for 5 minutes, the next thing I know, I'm falling asleep. Having never been one to nap during the day, this has been weird but I'm going with it.

Hugs,

S

[HappyMoni]

Moni, in my 3rd month post op I still needed a completely ridiculous amount of sleep and even now, rounding in on 5 months there are days I find if I lay down for 5 minutes, the next thing I know, I'm falling asleep. Having never been one to nap during the day, this has been weird but I'm going with it.

Hugs,

S

And here comes one of my awesome mentors now. Thank you Sadie! At least I can blame it on something besides me being a lazy butt. I have often wondered how I would react to total lack of T. I would think it has worked its way out of the system here at 2 1/2 to 3 months. I did just take a twilight walk with Ann, so I'm not a total veg. Doubt I will see much of my Packers play tonight though. It is becoming time for my surgeon's homework assignment to see if I will need to take T in prescription form. We will see.

[steph2.0]

Hope you are getting back to some kind of normal after the storm. I had relatives with no power, but they were lucky with no flood or wind damage.

We were without power for about 3 1/2 days, but no serious damage. So everything is back to "normal" around here.

I think I understand why I put "after so many years waiting." in the title to this thread. I waited over 55 years to be congruent, mind and body. That to me says, that after all that time, all that lousey  disphoric discomfort, dreams can come true. It means, don't give up.

I actually meant to reference the "so many years" title in my original post. I just turned 59 and am just getting started, so it's been a long time coming. I know there's still a long road to walk, but I've broken my dream up into a lot of smaller ones, and with time, one by one they're coming true.

I truly hope you will be making that post soon Steph.

Thank you, Moni. Maybe not soon, but I someday I will. Maybe then my future self will look back on this post, smile, and thank you again.

Steph

[Rachel]

Papillion home work. If you need some helpful suggestions I can help.

I was at a complete loss and really had no interest. Well, now I can get the engine running and then rev it up when I want to and get to the destination. I made sure I had my homework done before returning for my 6th month check up. Funny thing was at 3 months Brianna gave me my home work assignment. I had basic questions, real basic. She was very professional and gave me a starting point. I later went to a toy store run by lesbians (in the gayborhood there are different toy stores run by different types of gamers). They helped a lot and made some recommendations. I have a favorite

My 1 year assignment is a lot harder. Chrystal gave me the assignment. I was very surprised at how frank and upfront the assignment was. Rather matter of fact and pushed a bit. Asked me what was the point of the procedure? I had a answer but I kept it to myself.

Let me know if you need tips. 

[HappyMoni]

Papillion home work. If you need some helpful suggestions I can help.

I was at a complete loss and really had no interest. Well, now I can get the engine running and then rev it up when I want to and get to the destination. I made sure I had my homework done before returning for my 6th month check up. Funny thing was at 3 months Brianna gave me my home work assignment. I had basic questions, real basic. She was very professional and gave me a starting point. I later went to a toy store run by lesbians (in the gayborhood there are different toy stores run by different types of gamers). They helped a lot and made some recommendations. I have a favorite

My 1 year assignment is a lot harder. Chrystal gave me the assignment. I was very surprised at how frank and upfront the assignment was. Rather matter of fact and pushed a bit. Asked me what was the point of the procedure? I had a answer but I kept it to myself.

Let me know if you need tips.

Rachel,
  I'll take all comers when it comes to advice on this. I am at a bit of a loss, although I need to step up the hardware. Maybe I need to lose the cap pistol in favor of some heavy artillery.
   As for the purpose, I know the answer. It was to stop the pain with a chance at a new beginning. So far, chapter 1,  A plus.

Moni

[Rachel]

That was the he answer that came to mind; however, the answer Chrystal was implying to the retorical question was sex.

I purchased 4 toys. The one I really like is silicone. It has rings on the top , is tapered and curved up. I never use the vibrator. It is about 7 inches plus a handle.

There are 5 erotic zones I use. I use my mind and start with nipples. Then I gently use my cliterous lightly.  Next insertion and light motion alternating with nipples and cliterous. When warmed up I use the dildo to thrust to the back of  the vaginal canal. It will not break like an egg so experiment with strokes and force. When ready use the rings to massage the upper vaginal canal.

Experiment and take your time. Find what you like and explore. I enjoy the thrusting 😀

[JulieOnHerWay]

I enjoy the thrusting 😀

yea

[HappyMoni]

Hi all,
   I thought I would update this thread for my 3 month post op and add a personal note.

   I am back to work. I feel that at 3 months the only thing not back to normal is the speed with which I get tired. I suspect younger folks would not have this issue at this point. I sleep a fair amount. I could lift students for my job a month ago. I dilate 3 times a day. Once is at lunch at my school. I gobble food with one hand while holding it with the other. Not great but it works. I have developed  more scar tissue but dilation is still easy. I really think being conscientious early (5 times a day) set me up to have it easier later. I don't mind dilating, but get sick of the clean up. I am not cleared to swim due to still having a little white area inside the vulva below the urethra. I just mentally love to reach down there from time to time. It makes it real. I talked to a student about my sons today. She asked if there was a dad in the picture. I was like, "No." I then quickly changed the subject. I guess I hadn't thought about that question being asked. lol

   Okay, my personal message! I have keep a positive mental state throughout this journey. I look back so fondly at this period of time. I have no thought of any pain or discomfort, only good thoughts on the whole thing. The support from folks on Susan's was incredible. I started to get grumpy this weekend and was mad at myself for daring to go there. I now know that I am feeling a bit restless to finally finish this transition. This surgery was a giant leap in how I view myself.  It is time to move to the next mental state. I have been working, been tired, and maybe been a bit contemplative. I haven't posted as much. I see some  friends who are really having a hard time and I hate it. I feel bad that my attention here may have slipped. To anyone that I have talked to, I apologize if you needed something from me and I seemed distracted. I value my relationships on here and would hate to have someone think I backed away from them. It is not intentional.
   All my love,
   Moni