Having been regularly meeting with a few of the guys I used to work with in an IT department since I left in 2014, just after which I realised I was Transgender, I finally made a choice to tell them my situation. It's one of many conversations I'd been imaginging for a long time, and I probably blurted out far more than I should have but I was simply relieved to tell somebody outside my close family I guess I just rambled. I'd also had a few Sierra Nevada's too which helped loosen my fear (not that I recommend alcohol as an aid for such things!!). I've know most of them at least 10 years and one of them since 1991/2 so I'm sure the news was a major shock to some.
Although I've had a lot of stuff done and have been on meds for 7 months, it was kind of disappointing to hear they'd not really noticed anything different about me, but I hope that's because they've seen me regularly and any slight change each meet-up has been shadowed by that. Thankfully they were very dimplomatic and listened to what I had to say responding positively. I suspect, given time to digest the news, they might think differently but I told them if they have issues meeting up with me now my secret is out, I understand. I'm not somebody who sees negativity towards trans people as transphobia as I believe it is peoples right to express disagreement with my announcement just as much as it is mine to express myself as who I am.
Anyway, I feel soo much better now I've spoken to other people about it and am fully aware such headline news in the social circle will be too hard to keep quiet so I suspect I will see other people who will have heard the news from beyond the close friendship group. This is when I expect the negativity that goes beyond simple rights to speak and reaches nastyness and humilation etc. (i.e. genuine transphobia/discrimination) but it's too late to worry about that now though as one cannot take back what one has said.
To all those in a similar situation, I feel for you and wish you luck with the conversations. I now need to figure out how to approach the subject again with my parents after my mother went balisitic on me the first time!
Jenni
