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Emotions on a rollercoaster

Started by MissKairi, July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM

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MissKairi

July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM
Two days ago, ready to pack it in, convinced myself I would never ever pass so why bother, yesterday I felt very girly and light and realized that I CAN do it all, I have just been holding back because of work.
This morning I have the same chest tightness (in a good way) I have when I have been in love before.

Phew this is so crazy and I love/hate every minute
Let's see where this journey takes me.
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Sinclair

#1
July 19, 2017, 11:08:40 PM
Proud of you! Stick with who you know you are. We are here to support you sister.

Quote from: MissKairi on July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM
Two days ago, ready to pack it in, convinced myself I would never ever pass so why bother, yesterday I felt very girly and light and realized that I CAN do it all, I have just been holding back because of work.
This morning I have the same chest tightness (in a good way) I have when I have been in love before.

Phew this is so crazy and I love/hate every minute
I love dresses!!
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tgirlamg

#2
July 19, 2017, 11:46:03 PM
Quote from: MissKairi on July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM


Phew this is so crazy and I love/hate every minute

That's how you know your really living life!!!!.... You know why people ride rollercoasters?.... To feel alive!!!!

All will be well Kairi :)!!!!!

Onward we go brave sister!!!

Ashley :)
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment" ... Ralph Waldo Emerson 🌸

"The individual has always had to struggle from being overwhelmed by the tribe... But, no price is too high for the privilege of owning yourself" ... Rudyard Kipling 🌸

Let go of the things that no longer serve you... Let go of the pretense of the false persona, it is not you... Let go of the armor that you have worn for a lifetime, to serve the expectations of others and, to protect the woman inside... She needs protection no longer.... She is tired of hiding and more courageous than you know... Let her prove that to you....Let her step out of the dark and feel the light upon her face.... amg🌸

Ashley's Corner: https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247549.0.html 🌻
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Mirath

#3
July 20, 2017, 12:45:30 AM
Ah, the ups and downs of 'what the hell am I doing?'

The ups sort of go like 'hell yes I can do this'
The downs... aren't so great haha, full of aful doubts and feelings.

But since when was life 100% easy? If it was easy enough to wake up tomorrow in a desired gender, that'd be good.
The wandering fictionkin

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Cheaney

#4
July 20, 2017, 01:17:42 AM
Quote from: MissKairi on July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM
Two days ago, ready to pack it in, convinced myself I would never ever pass so why bother, yesterday I felt very girly and light and realized that I CAN do it all, I have just been holding back because of work.
This morning I have the same chest tightness (in a good way) I have when I have been in love before.

Phew this is so crazy and I love/hate every minute

I'm with you friend. Except I haven't gotten the meds yet haha. Had a crazy moment the other day where I felt absolutely alive doing what I love to do most. And my next thought was "I wonder if I would feel like this all the time if I was a girl?" Obviously I can't answer that yet but man that thought still kinda gets me. Anybody else think that? Or better yet experience something like that? Is it crazy talk? Help a sister out!
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MissKairi

#5
July 20, 2017, 01:25:25 AM
Quote from: VickieBlue on July 20, 2017, 01:17:42 AM
I'm with you friend. Except I haven't gotten the meds yet haha. Had a crazy moment the other day where I felt absolutely alive doing what I love to do most. And my next thought was "I wonder if I would feel like this all the time if I was a girl?" Obviously I can't answer that yet but man that thought still kinda gets me. Anybody else think that? Or better yet experience something like that? Is it crazy talk? Help a sister out!

I think we're both nuts Vicki haha :)
Let's see where this journey takes me.
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Cheaney

#6
July 20, 2017, 01:34:41 AM
Quote from: MissKairi on July 20, 2017, 01:25:25 AM
I think we're both nuts Vicki haha :)

You know there was a time I would have argued against it.

But now there's no doubt I'm right there with you! :laugh:
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Denise

#7
July 20, 2017, 06:01:59 AM


Quote from: MissKairi on July 19, 2017, 10:22:06 PM
Two days ago, ready to pack it in, convinced myself I would never ever pass so why bother, yesterday I felt very girly and light and realized that I CAN do it all, I have just been holding back because of work.
This morning I have the same chest tightness (in a good way) I have when I have been in love before

I take the good days and "bank" them.  I emboss them in my mind and remember how I felt.  Then when a bad day comes I have those good feedings to fall back on.  Eventually every day is a good day and they become the norm.  I haven't had a "I can't do this", "what the heck am I doing", "I'll never get away with this" day in months.

The good days are fun and the emotional ups and downs continue but for other external issues.

"Extra hugs" to you to start your good feelings bank account.

- Denise

Sent from my LG-H910 using Tapatalk

1st Person out: 16-Oct-2015
Restarted Spironolactone 26-Aug-2016
Restarted Estradiol Valerate: 02-Nov-2016
Full time: 02-Mar-2017
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FFS (Walton in Chicago): 25-Sep-2018
Vaginoplasty (Schechter): 13-Dec-2018









A haiku in honor of my grandmother who loved them.
The Voices are Gone
Living Life to the Fullest
I am just Denise
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