possibility of T?

[lawn_flamingo]

hi there im a 15 year old agender pansexual person from the uk. i wanted to find a forum so i could ask some questions about t? i am DFAB and realised i was non binary a couple years ago now, i am closeted and am apprehensive about coming out to my parents.

my main question though is about the effects of t as i want to present as more masculine and would like to start in my teens so i might gain some height (im about 5'3). the thing is i dont want to fully be male but i dont want to be biologically female either so t feels like the only option? i dont know how the process works and i wanted know the process and what parts t starts affecting first to see if its the right thing to do.

to clarify i would like the benefits of t such as height and more masculine features but i dont know if i want the deep voice. my presentation goal is to look very androgynous

[Dena]

Welcome to Susan's Place. T is very powerful and unless you are willing to accept all the changes it will bring, you should consider it very carefully. We have had members who had results they didn't expect and now have to live with the results. Yes, a non binary can have T but the results are binary. We also see non binary who have gender surgery and a number of other procedures.

At 15 years old, your best bet would be to see about getting estrogen blockers. That would allow you to gain height but would put the remainder of your puberty on hold until you are a bit older and have had more time to think about this. Should you decide to continue along the feminine path, you only need to discontinue the blocker. If you decide male it more appropriate, you can switch to T when you are of legal age.

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[lawn_flamingo]

thank you for the reply.

i was an early bloomer so most of my puberty is done at this point. i think the easiest option would probably be to wait it out and look into t when im independent and can consult professionals without the approval of my parents

[Elis]

In female puberty hip growth and breast develop can develop more so rather late (late teens or early 20s) and can happen rather suddenly. So there's a chance you haven't finished puberty yet. Just something to consider.

As for T its a powerful hormone and the changes can't be guessed completely accurately when they'll take place or to what extent. Voice breaking happens within a month, but took 6 months for it to settle and be in a male range. Clit growth wasn't noticeable until a few months on T.

I'm nb myself but felt I need T as my brain is mostly male; so without it I feel foggy and the dysphoria is too much to bear.  But at the same time I don't like all the changes that have come with T. I don't have the androgynous look I desire because of how much muscle I gained and how masculine my face now looks. I think it's important to weigh up the mental benefits with the physical negatives to help decide if it's right for you.

[Dan]

thank you for the reply.

i was an early bloomer so most of my puberty is done at this point. i think the easiest option would probably be to wait it out and look into t when im independent and can consult professionals without the approval of my parents

Very wise choice. 

[widdershins]

thank you for the reply.

i was an early bloomer so most of my puberty is done at this point. i think the easiest option would probably be to wait it out and look into t when im independent and can consult professionals without the approval of my parents

If it's any consolation, most AFAB people are mostly done growing by your age. You might see some minor changes in terms of facial structure, but even that can be mitigated later in life by the fat redistribution you get from T. And if your goal is to look androgynous and not super-masculine, the feminine bone structure might actually work in your favor down the road after T works its magic.

However, what Elis said about breast and hip development is correct: a lot of people see them continue on into their early twenties. I stopped growing in height at 15, but my chest kept going until I was like, 22-23. (I'm a F/G cup now. Sigh.) So you still might want to look into T sooner rather than later once you're legally able to, if that's a concern. 

[lawn_flamingo]

ah i didnt realise that about the hip growth thank you.

it is concerning considering my hips are already quite wide but i guess all i can do again is to wait and see if they grow more. i dont mind my hips too much since they can help keep trousers up on me but yea sometimes i do see small hipped masculine looking torsos and it leaves me wanting.