Holy heck...did I just do that|?

[MissKairi]

So, what's a HUGE thing you have done as transgender where you thought "oh wow! I really did that!"

So let me start.

Okay it's 4:50AM I am dressed and in makeup and I decide "screw it, I am going to walk around the block"
I have never been outside before unless 100% male presenting
Now, it's a short walk, five minutes tops but it does mean people may see me.
I mean I live on the top floor on an apartment building meaning every man and his dog could see me on the way down.

So I traverse my apartment building easy enough, I mean it IS 5AM and start to walk, around the corner, up the street and I hear a car revving...yeah, seems like the local boy racers have decided my route is where there wanna wank each other off via the noise their cars make...at 5AM....on a Sunday.

Yikes! But I don't stop, they are too involved in their engines to even notice me.
I continue walking expecting a full on abuse shouted my way but none comes.
They are too busy.

Anyway, I am home now. I thought my heart would be racing, but it's not.
I want to pass as a female so badly and I am know I am so far away but...step one complete.

Your turn

[elkie-t]

I'm on the 4th of July camping in a forest and rangers told me there's no one camping elsewhere in the forest. On my second night, I went to an artesian well to get some fresh water and I hear (from a distance) a truck moving to the parking spot. OMG, I never ran so fast in a skirt, nor hide that well under solid wall of bushes...


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[Laurie]

Hi Kairi

I'm Laurie. Your excursion was a brave thing to do. I remember the fear I felt on my first outing and many others since. But I think my adventure that fits your topic is my month long road trip across country en femme meeting with others from Susan's Place. It wasn't my first time out  or anything like that but it was a long time  being in the public eye in search of myself. I posted a whole thread documenting it called Road Trip.
  I think I found myself on the trip and returned a different person.

  Hugs,
    Laurie

[Rachel_Christina]

That's cool when you finally build up the confidence.
Unfortunately for me in a situation like that, I would have ended up in amongst the cars ha!
"Hit the two step real quick"

I never had much chance to be shocked at any of the things I did, I got rail roaded and pushed in most of the time.
First toilet thing was a bit nerve racking tbh

[Raell]

elkie-T..you went camping in a SKIRT?

Places where ciswomen wear skirts..to a fancy restaurant, to a ballroom dance, to work if there's a dress code. At home, camping, doing yard work, all ciswomen I know wear jeans and T-shirts.

But if you were just practicing, I get it.

[elkie-t]

elkie-T..you went camping in a SKIRT?

Places where ciswomen wear skirts..to a fancy restaurant, to a ballroom dance, to work if there's a dress code. At home, camping, doing yard work, all ciswomen I know wear jeans and T-shirts.

But if you were just practicing, I get it.

As my mom once said, I'm not a butch to wear pants. So, for me, a skirt is a must, otherwise what's the point to crossdress. At least I wasn't wearing heels

But you aren't exactly correct that ciswomen don't wear skirts or dresses camping - look for instance here - https://thetrek.co/hiking-dresses-skirts/

And hiking in a skirt is very pleasurable... feeling fresh air on your legs and under the skirt... I was a bit afraid of mosquitoes, but they took vacation that day (or I could use some deet).

[Raell]

Well, I supposed skirts would work if:

1. You constantly make sure no one can see up your skirt and the wind doesn't blow
2. There are no stinging insects, OR you don't mind slathering yourself in toxic bug spray
3. There are no stickers or thorns
4. You never stumble or fall
5. You never climb up a steep place where you have to grab handholds and brace with your knees
6. You never have to climb a tree
7. You never have to run

If you have to make all those precautions, I don't see the point of hiking or camping at all.
Besides, the only cisfemales likely to wear a dress or skirt are older ones with religious constraints.
If you want to blend in with cisfemales, they definitely DON'T wear skirts if they don't have to.

But I suppose wearing ultra femme things appeals to transpeople who have been wearing men's clothing against their will and want to go the other way as far as possible.

[elkie-t]

Well, I supposed skirts would work if:

1. You constantly make sure no one can see up your skirt and the wind doesn't blow
2. There are no stinging insects, OR you don't mind slathering yourself in toxic bug spray
3. There are no stickers or thorns
4. You never stumble or fall
5. You never climb up a steep place where you have to grab handholds and brace with your knees
6. You never have to climb a tree
7. You never have to run

If you have to make all those precautions, I don't see the point of hiking or camping at all.
Besides, the only cisfemales likely to wear a dress or skirt are older ones with religious constraints.
If you want to blend in with cisfemales, they definitely DON'T wear skirts if they don't have to.

But I suppose wearing ultra femme things appeals to transpeople who have been wearing men's clothing against their will and want to go the other way as far as possible.

1) I'm not that conscious if anyone sees my bikini or not. Occasionally
2) I never experienced stinging mosquitoes under my skirt (and I camped a lot since then). Part of it was due to doing it in California where mosquitoes aren't that common, but in the end -a skirt is not worse than shorts of equal length.
3) need to be a bit careful when bushwacking. But normally people travel on trails. When off trail and around thorns, a skirt isn't worse than shorts or thin pants. And if I pair my skirt with tall snake boots (as I did), my thorn protection might be even better than someone's wearing jeans and snickers.
4) I'm fairly steady. And if I stumble, my exposure would be of a less concern than breaking bones.
5) I climbed some hills where I would need to use my hands in skirts. No more difficult (with the right skirt) than climbing in pants. You only need to be sure there's no guys climbing right behind you (if there is one group - I'd let them pass, if there's more than that - it's probably too crowded to my taste).
6) I'm not obsessed playing Tarzan, I wanted to play Jane My only tree climbing is climbing over a fallen tree. Need to hike the skirt up, climb over it, put the skirt back no problema.
7) I'm not a runner. Would I be, I don't see how an a-shaped skirt (god forbid me from pencil skirts - those are for the cities) would interfere with my running. If it would, I'll just hike it up a little

Where's a will there's a way. And there's no way, I'll be fitting in as s cisfemale. So, there's no point for me to be even trying. And yes, as many cisladies are compensating their obligatory skirt-wearing during younger years by not wearing skirts again unless they absolutely must, so do we - trans-females compensating years of obligatory pants-wearing.

But skirts themselves aren't less comfortable than pants in outdoors. Romans conquered the world in skirts. Scotts like their kilts too.

[LizK]

Elkie-t I have to say I come down on the side of Skirts and the freedom to finally wear what I like, with you! However since Skirts are not really the topic of conversation in this thread...How about I move us back on to the topic at hand


When I was still in my very first stepping out as Liz days I was not as yet presenting female many places however a friend of mine asked me out to coffee and I accepted...problem was she asked Liz out so Liz was going for coffee. I was nervous for the 3 days leading into the actual coffee date however it wasn't until I was at the place I was meant to be...rummaging through my handbag did it hit me that I had just put on makeup, dressed fully fem and was about to enter a coffee shop in broad daylight on a busy day and it was only now that the enormity of what I was doing hit me...I kept smiling and went and met my friend...it was a memorable moment milestone.

[elkie-t]

And, I'm not wearing ultra-feminine stuff outdoors, I wear hiking skirts, strong nylon (I was wearing jeans skirts too though), not interfering with my movements - knee length (although I was wearing some long skirts in the past as well, but those aren't as comfortable), a-shape.

Once I backpacked with a Sierra Club group, it was a long hike on a hot day with a bit too much weight on my back (my backpack ended up the heaviest of all). My wig was terribly messed up with perspiration (that's when I converted to headscarfs over my own hair), my makeup ... (you can guess it), and I needed to cover my beard shadow even if I shaved really well and it was for one night only. Well, in the camp, I hide myself in my tent immediately after i got it set up and didn't reemerge until I cleaned up my face with makeup removing napkins and washed my body with a little wet towel and reapplied the makeup and I pulled a little cute dress sitting in my backpack for the social hour and was wearing it

With all my other troubles, wearing that dress was not a concern, but rather made me feel good. A few other ladies commented on it as a 'nice idea to pack a dress for the social gathering in the evening, we will do it next time'. I don't know if they did it or not, or they were polite. But then, I did not ask their opinion, they just complemented me on their own as women do when they like something. They weren't complimenting my wig, that would be a total lie


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[Raell]

LOL! OK, think of it this way.

I see myself as mostly male. Suppose I decide to try to "fit in" with men by joining a hiking/camping trip wearing a suit and wingtips, or even just dress slacks and dress shirt. I could use the same arguments, but all the men would stare.

But do whatever you want. My transwomen friends are the same way, insisting on wearing sexy gowns, heels, and pearls just to walk to the mailbox, they are so anxious to fit in with ciswomen, never realizing how it draws attention.

[V M]

I pretty much participated in a rehab experiment of sorts and we were briefed on the the rules

She was allowed to hug and kiss me but not on the lips and I allowed her to braid my hair, it was a controlled environment

I'm hoping this will help her to live a normal life

[elkie-t]

LOL! OK, think of it this way.

I see myself as mostly male. Suppose I decide to try to "fit in" with men by joining a hiking/camping trip wearing a suit and wingtips, or even just dress slacks and dress shirt. I could use the same arguments, but all the men would stare.

But do whatever you want. My transwomen friends are the same way, insisting on wearing sexy gowns, heels, and pearls just to walk to the mailbox, they are so anxious to fit in with ciswomen, never realizing how it draws attention.

Is it desire to fit in or look sexy? I never claimed I wanted to fit in only to look gorgeous.

And one of my buddy, a very experienced backpacker, once went on a winter camping trip wearing dress pants people not knowing him would question his sanity, but they would fail to know those dress pants were 100% wool and warmest he had, most suitable for winter camping (and that he bought those pants at goodwills for $5 and wouldn't care about their looks after the trip)

[elkie-t]

Elkie-t I have to say I come down on the side of Skirts and the freedom to finally wear what I like, with you! However since Skirts are not really the topic of conversation in this thread...How about I move us back on to the topic at hand

Sorry, Liz. Sometimes friendly discussion takes unexpected turns and leads to unexpected ways...

[Denise]

One word... Skorts

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[Geeker]

You know how during homecoming week in high school they like to do a theme for each day of that week? Well, the school I went to like to do an opposite day. I spent an entire day, dressed as a female, at school. Nothing fancy, low rise flare leg jeans and a keyhole halter top, it was one of the best days of my life at that point... heck still one of the best days of my life.

[sarah1972]

My "Holy heck.. did I just do that?" moment ended in a decent panic attack...

One day I was in our HR system to request time off. I poked around and saw a possibility to add a preferred name and gender... 20 minutes later I see an email from HR: Change approved, IT will be changing your email and the corporate address book. About 3 month prior to my planned coming out...

So in all panic I started calling people about the upcoming change and later that night actually stopped the IT Ticket. I kind of chickened out. I had somewhat of a panic attack that night.

But the door was opened - took me 4 weeks to recover and a nice chat with HR to be ready for a second try. And went for another "did I just do that" moment... Wrote a nice long email and sent it to about 30% of the company. This was one of my best days ever, so much support and nice notes. Fully out & Full-time since this day :-) Still all a bit scary but it get's better every week.

[Kendra]

Sarah I can imagine genuine panic, I would have been just as horrified.  Now that it's the past I did get a good laugh - awesome story.  HR departments are careful with people but annoyed with machinery, IT departments tend to do the opposite.  Can you imagine if IT had replied to your cancel request with something like "file not found." 

Glad it worked out, something I'll think about as I do my switcheroo at work a few months from now. 

And congratulations on your great change at work, with a nice email instead of "whoops"    

[sarah1972]

Hahaha - yes, today I can genuinely laugh about it. Usually our HR takes month to get anything done. Luckily IT is equally slow. Not even sure what came over me that day. Anyways, it all worked out for the best and this week I am supposed to get brand new shiny "Sarah" business cards too. Just sped up the inevitable.

Sarah I can imagine genuine panic, I would have been just as horrified.  Now that it's the past I did get a good laugh - awesome story.  HR departments are careful with people but annoyed with machinery, IT departments tend to do the opposite.  Can you imagine if IT had replied to your cancel request with something like "file not found." 

Glad it worked out, something I'll think about as I do my switcheroo at work a few months from now. 

And congratulations on your great change at work, with a nice email instead of "whoops"   

[Jacqueline]

I'm glad to see this has gotten back on track. Next time it feels like a topic is being overshadowed by discussion of something else we will likely split it off as a separate topic.

I told this story one time before but it was kind of along those lines.

It was over a year ago. I was occasionally presenting but not doing so at the moment. I was in a mall where a dealership was doing work on a car. I was actually doing some moderation and checking in on the site. Suddenly had to go to the washroom. I now always wear women's slacks and usually some B.O.C. clogs(even in drab mode).

I walked into the washroom. Sat down to pee when I hear what sounds like high heals come into the space. Then I hear a woman's voice talking on her cell phone. I think to myself first, what is she doing in the men's room. Then I start to wonder, did I see urinals? I waited for the woman to finish her business and leave. Carefully creep out of the stall, then jack rabbit out of the washroom. Yup, I was in the ladies in male mode.

Still red faced

Joanna