Hi y'all.
I'm a FTM, just starting to socially transition. I've had my male name, Nathaniel, since I was 8 though I only used it in online contexts while playing MMORPGs. I stopped considering it my name when I started middle school as I tried to conform to the gender assigned to me. Well, that failed of course. After 9 years of depression, low self-esteem, and projection of my negative feelings onto those around me, I'm finally getting to a good place. I'm 21 years old now, about to start my last year of University (film major) in a very blue city in a very red state. It's been weird trying to readjust to my name, and I had never heard it said aloud before. It's been amazing, but very scary.
I'm not out yet to most of my friends nor any of my family. I'm sure once I get my courage up they will all be very accepting, but it's like looking over the edge of a really high diving board. They say it'll be fine, but the fear of the impact keeps me rooted to the board.
Who I am as a person: I am a filmmaker, artist, photographer, and budding writer. I am an avid reader, especially of fantasy/sci-fi and classic novels (I just finished Dark Matter, and it is thrilling). I love to cook, whether I'm any good at it is a different story. I eat pineapple pizza, which may make some people automatically despise me.
My favorite animal is a bear. I make bear puns. I have a bear tattoo on my arm. And my friends think my gray baseball cap is permanently affixed to my head.
So that's basically me. I'm so excited to meet everyone and hear your stories.
