Here's hoping someone will have some advice for you, Myranda. I've come across pointers for about everything here in old threads, like staving off being overly flaccid pre-SRS by using a penis pump. That might actually help in your case, too. Or a Fleshlight?
I should mention that I'm excited...

about having my libido drop in a big way. For years I've just want to shout at that thing SHUT UP! Also I thought that feminine style orgasms were something only post-op girls experienced. What brings this on, anyway? Purely psychological, physical, a mix of the two?
I'm a ton more patient about things now, including carnality. Maybe in the case of people in more dire straits that equates to relief from anxiety - dysphoria isn't disabling to me.