On life's bumpy road

[steph2.0]

So, as I mentioned before, I need my birth certificate changed before I can change my gender with social security.

Sarah, are you sure about this? Since it's the feds who handle SS, it should be the same in every state, and the birth certificate had nothing to do with it here in Florida.

Also, the records people are correct. They only issue name change orders, and they have nothing to do with gender.

Here's what I had to do, in order. Note that this is in Florida, so some things will be different.

1. Fill out and send in the paperwork requesting a name change for the court. I had help with this from a legal aid group that put on a free name change seminar.

2. Wait for paperwork to arrive to go get my fingerprints taken for the criminal background check, then go to a facility where they can be sent to the FBI electronically.

3. Wait for the court to contact me with a date for the hearing.

4. Create an account at the court's online portal, and represent myself as counsel. It was just a checkbox and a field to put your name into.

5. Upload any documents they request. If I recall, they needed a scan of my existing drivers license,  birth certificate, and social security card, and an affidavit of residency. I downloaded a free copy of the AOR from an online legal service (Rocket Legal?)

6. Attended the hearing, and got the order in-hand.

7. Got a letter from my endocrinologist stating that I'm undergoing appropriate clinical treatment for gender change.

8. Took that letter and the court order to a SS office, and had them make the change and issue a receipt I could use at the DMV.

9. Waited a few days so the information got into the system, then went to the DMV and got my new drivers license.

10. With all that in-hand, started the arduous process of changing everything that had my old name on it.

Note that I've done nothing at all with my birth certificate except send a copy of the old one to the court. It still isn't changed, and in fact, having been born in Michigan, I can't change the gender marker until I have GCS. I won't bother with the name until I can do that.

Again, I'm certain that SS doesn't need the birth certificate changed. Every state is different for their stuff, but SS is federal. I'd hit their website and double check that.


- Stephanie

[Sarah_P]

7. Got a letter from my endocrinologist stating that I'm undergoing appropriate clinical treatment for gender change.

8. Took that letter and the court order to a SS office, and had them make the change and issue a receipt I could use at the DMV.

Again, I'm certain that SS doesn't need the birth certificate changed. Every state is different for their stuff, but SS is federal. I'd hit their website and double check that.

See, there's the problem. You had a court order for the gender change, but Kansas doesn't and can't issue a court order for a gender change - I asked the Judge at the hearing and he said Kansas doesn't give it's Judges authority to do so (he had another trans person ask just a few weeks earlier). The DMV changed it on my license because of my letter from my doctor.

I can try going to a different SS office, but I'm sure it wasn't a case of bigotry (though I suppose it could be incompetence?). The guy was very nice & apologetic about it.

[steph2.0]

See, there's the problem. You had a court order for the gender change, but Kansas doesn't and can't issue a court order for a gender change - I asked the Judge at the hearing and he said Kansas doesn't give it's Judges authority to do so (he had another trans person ask just a few weeks earlier). The DMV changed it on my license because of my letter from my doctor.

I can try going to a different SS office, but I'm sure it wasn't a case of bigotry (though I suppose it could be incompetence?). The guy was very nice & apologetic about it.

I apologize, Sarah. I wasn't clear. My court order was only for the name change. Gender wasn't mentioned in it anywhere.  Judges don't have authority to do gender marker changes here, either. All that was required for gender change for social security was the doctor's letter plus the name change court order, and some kind of identification.

I think you're right, your local SSA guy didn't understand the process. Here it is, right from their website. Under Gender, you need to show only one of the choices:

https://faq.ssa.gov/link/portal/34011/34019/Article/2856/How-do-I-change-my-gender-on-Social-Security-s-records

All I showed them were the name change court order, my existing drivers license (the old one), my doctor's letter, and for good measure, my old social security card, and it went off without a hitch. They were very nice and congratulated me on my way out.

I really hope that helps. I hope you'll find it's a lot easier than you think.

Good luck!

Stephanie

[Sarah_P]

I apologize, Sarah. I wasn't clear. My court order was only for the name change. Gender wasn't mentioned in it anywhere.  Judges don't have authority to do gender marker changes here, either. All that was required for gender change for social security was the doctor's letter plus the name change court order, and some kind of identification.

I think you're right, your local SSA guy didn't understand the process. Here it is, right from their website. Under Gender, you need to show only one of the choices:

https://faq.ssa.gov/link/portal/34011/34019/Article/2856/How-do-I-change-my-gender-on-Social-Security-s-records

All I showed them were the name change court order, my existing drivers license (the old one), my doctor's letter, and for good measure, my old social security card, and it went off without a hitch. They were very nice and congratulated me on my way out.

I really hope that helps. I hope you'll find it's a lot easier than you think.

Good luck!

Stephanie

Well.... dang it. Sorry Stephanie, and thank you so much!! I'll have to hit up the SS office in Kansas City, which unfortunately will likely be a much longer wait than the one I went to.

That still leaves my bc and school records to be dealt with. Sigh.

[bobbisue]

Sarah, are you sure about this? Since it's the feds who handle SS, it should be the same in every state, and the birth certificate had nothing to do with it here in Florida.

Also, the records people are correct. They only issue name change orders, and they have nothing to do with gender.

Here's what I had to do, in order. Note that this is in Florida, so some things will be different.

1. Fill out and send in the paperwork requesting a name change for the court. I had help with this from a legal aid group that put on a free name change seminar.

2. Wait for paperwork to arrive to go get my fingerprints taken for the criminal background check, then go to a facility where they can be sent to the FBI electronically.

3. Wait for the court to contact me with a date for the hearing.

4. Create an account at the court's online portal, and represent myself as counsel. It was just a checkbox and a field to put your name into.

5. Upload any documents they request. If I recall, they needed a scan of my existing drivers license,  birth certificate, and social security card, and an affidavit of residency. I downloaded a free copy of the AOR from an online legal service (Rocket Legal?)

6. Attended the hearing, and got the order in-hand.

7. Got a letter from my endocrinologist stating that I'm undergoing appropriate clinical treatment for gender change.

8. Took that letter and the court order to a SS office, and had them make the change and issue a receipt I could use at the DMV.

9. Waited a few days so the information got into the system, then went to the DMV and got my new drivers license.

10. With all that in-hand, started the arduous process of changing everything that had my old name on it.

Note that I've done nothing at all with my birth certificate except send a copy of the old one to the court. It still isn't changed, and in fact, having been born in Michigan, I can't change the gender marker until I have GCS. I won't bother with the name until I can do that.

Again, I'm certain that SS doesn't need the birth certificate changed. Every state is different for their stuff, but SS is federal. I'd hit their website and double check that.


- Stephanie

Wow that is quite a process we now have a very simple process thanks to a wonderful lady who challenged the government in court and won I hope to be meeting her this summer we now only need to have a letter from a health care provider stating it is their opinion we identify as our chosen gender and are living as such and sign an affidavit and send it to the government the name change can be done by mail as well oh yes and send money most important

     bobbisue

[Sarah_P]

So as I posted in the happy thread, today was my first date in 20 years. It was with a lovely trans woman from the KC area. She drove all the way out to my little town & we had lunch, then we drove up to KC for some shopping. Which is something that hadn't occurred to me before about dating another woman - shopping as a fun date activity!!! 

She's actually never been here on Susan's, but I told her about it, so maybe she'll stop by. We both had a great time! I think dating a trans woman as my first date really took a lot of the potential pressure off, even though I was nervous a few times. Like having my first kiss in 20 years. 

The only bad part of the day was that I was still fighting a cold or whatever it was that I thought I was over. As the day went on I started coughing more and more & could barely talk by the time she dropped me off.  Our kiss was rather brief, since I was worried about potentially coughing right into her mouth. 

[Jayne01]

That's great news Sarah. I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. It sounds like your date went well. Hope you ditch your cold soon.

Jayne

[Roll]

That is amazing news!! So happy for you!

[Laurie]

And here I thought you were saving your first date for me.

Well heck, I might as well cross your visit off my road trip itenary since you are taken.

Tsk tsk

Congrats Sarah.

  I may have to try this date thing again if I can remember how it's done. I seem to remember it was fun.
   Hmmmm probably too old.

Hugs,
   Laurie

Sent from my LGL44VL using Tapatalk

[Megan.]

So as I posted in the happy thread, today was my first date in 20 years. It was with a lovely trans woman from the KC area. She drove all the way out to my little town & we had lunch, then we drove up to KC for some shopping. Which is something that hadn't occurred to me before about dating another woman - shopping as a fun date activity!!! 

She's actually never been here on Susan's, but I told her about it, so maybe she'll stop by. We both had a great time! I think dating a trans woman as my first date really took a lot of the potential pressure off, even though I was nervous a few times. Like having my first kiss in 20 years. 

The only bad part of the day was that I was still fighting a cold or whatever it was that I thought I was over. As the day went on I started coughing more and more & could barely talk by the time she dropped me off.  Our kiss was rather brief, since I was worried about potentially coughing right into her mouth. 

Lovely to read, I'm glad it went well. It's almost Spring (in the 'proper' hemisphere [emoji23]), time for romance to bud! X

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

[Colleen_definitely]

I drove through your neck of the woods on Thursday but didn't have time to stop.  Lots of "emergencies" for work that really weren't.  I did wave though

[Sarah_P]

Thanks gals!! Sadly my illness has come back full-force, and I can barely speak today, but it was worth it.

  I may have to try this date thing again if I can remember how it's done. I seem to remember it was fun.
   Hmmmm probably too old.

NO SUCH THING! You're never to old!! I won't stand for any of that nonsense young lady!

[Sarah_P]

I drove through your neck of the woods on Thursday but didn't have time to stop.  Lots of "emergencies" for work that really weren't.  I did wave though

I thought I felt a disturbance in the Trans Force! (That actually sounds like an awesome action team name!)
You're always welcome to stop by, the library is pretty easy to find. 

[Colleen_definitely]

I'll try to structure my next trip (likely soon with the buffoons I have to deal with at this particular site "wait you're supposed to replace air filters when they turn black?") to include some extra "travel" time. 

[Sarah_P]

I'll try to structure my next trip (likely soon with the buffoons I have to deal with at this particular site "wait you're supposed to replace air filters when they turn black?") to include some extra "travel" time. 

Lol, I was really aghast when years ago I had to tell my boss that ac filters had to be changed at a minimum twice a year. I think when I told her that they hadn't been changed in 3 years or so. 

[Faith]

oh please, everyone knows that you only change filters for two reasons ..
1) no air movement
2) it got sucked into the unit.

[Colleen_definitely]

Or 3) The cooling fans on your $250,000 spectrometer start howling from the dirt they've ingested since you took the filter off after it overheated due to a clogged filter.

I wish I was joking

[Sarah_P]

I really do believe it. I've seen people completely block air vents on their PCs, and wonder why it stops working. Ignorance is not so blissful... or cheap.

[Roll]

Lol, I was really aghast when years ago I had to tell my boss that ac filters had to be changed at a minimum twice a year. I think when I told her that they hadn't been changed in 3 years or so. 

Yeah when I moved in with my dad and step mom... No filter had been changed in... ohhh, 14 years? Not just air filters. They always complained about their gross water, so I bought them a new fridge filter while at it for Christmas one year, now the water is fine and the ice doesn't have black specks in it. There is serious mold on the vents in my room that are too high for me to reach and take weird ulltra specific filters you have to special order, so I'm just sort of pretending it doesn't exist and that there isn't a yellow film covering the back half of the room. I'm moving soon, then not my problem.

[Cassi]

Yeah when I moved in with my dad and step mom... No filter had been changed in... ohhh, 14 years? Not just air filters. They always complained about their gross water, so I bought them a new fridge filter while at it for Christmas one year, now the water is fine and the ice doesn't have black specks in it. There is serious mold on the vents in my room that are too high for me to reach and take weird ulltra specific filters you have to special order, so I'm just sort of pretending it doesn't exist and that there isn't a yellow film covering the back half of the room. I'm moving soon, then not my problem.

After checking and cleaning the intake filter, I looked at the vent in my room and there wasn't any filter.  Not sure if they're suppose to have filters or not.

This is Vegas and if I leave the front door open, super micro dust comes in and it's not the regular dust we create from shedding.

I joined CostCo last month and they had 40 bottle packs of water on sale for $3.07 so I bought five (the limit).  Arrowhead water.  Funny thing about Arrowhead water is that it's originally from California and there's a well in the foothills of the San Bernardino Mountains next to a rec area called Twin Lakes.  That's where Arrowhead gets their water.  In Texas, it's call Ozark Mountain Water and has the same color scheme as Arrowhead.

Sorry got off topic.  Anyway, the one filter that I swear by is the Zero filter - totally awesome.