Can one live as their target gender without passing?

[Rachael]

actually no, laws arnt 'guidelines'
thier follow them, or get b& from society....
most transpeople need to be extra careful, as they may end up getting bummed in the showers in a mens prison (for m2f women)
R

[NicholeW.]

actually no, laws arnt 'guidelines'
thier follow them, or get b& from society....
most transpeople need to be extra careful, as they may end up getting bummed in the showers in a mens prison (for m2f women)
R

Laws are always guidelines if the enforcers don't enforce them, Rach. That's why in many places you could be killed and no one would even investigate. Why you could be raped and people would still say, "she got what she asked for." Actually those people would never use the correct gender-designation for you.

I am glad you haven't had to face that yet. It's there. You're merely lucky and have been fortunate enough in social-class, race or upbringing to not see the difference. 

Like I said before: you say pa-tay-ta. Well enough. I hope your education isn't a rough one.

Hugs,

N~

[Rachael]

i wont say i wont experience transphobia... but tbh, as im stealth now, i doubt its gonna come any time soon *knocks on wood*
R

[Natasha]

I don't think it can be possible.  Just look around. Society expects certain actions, looks and attitudes from all of us. Our society demands certain behavor in all of us. The price of not conforming to some of these expectations is just too high for most folks.  Sorry but I'm just very pragmatic.

[cindybc]

Hi Ell you can join me under my rock. No body will know where we are except after dark they will see two little pairs of eyes blinking under the rock
Cindy

[RebeccaFog]

there will be no hiding.  The sunshine is ours as much as it is anybody else's

[Veronica Secret]

i wont say i wont experience transphobia... but tbh, as im stealth now, i doubt its gonna come any time soon *knocks on wood*
R

Going from starting RLE to Stealth in nine months. I think you made the Guiness. Congrats! Love your T-shirt too, my best friend's x-husband is the guitar player in Metallica. Too bad she was forced to sign up a pre-nup, otherwise she'd be wealthy.

[Kate]

So take a genetic female, and force her to wear a I WAS BORN A MALE t-shirt the rest of her life... so she can no longer "pass."

Will she never REALLY be living as a woman from then on? Is she only an AS IF woman now?

~Kate~

[Hypatia]

If you fall within a reasonable range and learn to add some confidence to your walk and your talk, rather than always obsessing about how much you should look, sound or move like "a real woman" then you become for others, "a real woman." For the general public. And I have found that same applies in a more personal life.

This is quite true! It has recently come true for me. It took a long hard climb for me to reach this, but I'm so glad that suffering is past. Don't despair when it looks difficult at first. It gets better in the way that Nichole described.

For your personal friends, etc, same applies, only there you MUST curb the desire to tell. Never tell. People are allowed to think or suspect or wonder all they wish, and they will no matter what I do. So yes, again as Rach said, be yourself. And keep your mouth shut when it comes to queries.

LOL, this past summer is when I first got hit in the face with the fact that I was doing better than I thought I was. I made a new friend, and after I mentioned being trans to her, she told me she had not known until I said it. Before then I'd gotten used to it being obvious. Now I'm getting used to it actually working for me. I don't know if it was the hormones, or practice, or the stars in alignment, or my prayers being heard by divine providence, but by the time autumn arrived I finally was ready for prime time. Now I don't even need to think about it, let alone talk about it. I just be myself.

[Rachael]

So take a genetic female, and force her to wear a I WAS BORN A MALE t-shirt the rest of her life... so she can no longer "pass."

Will she never REALLY be living as a woman from then on? Is she only an AS IF woman now?

~Kate~

tbh, i dont think people would believe it, she would still pass as female, poeple would think it a joke... she will be living as a woman, because she IS... NOBODY will take a teeshirt seriously unless the rest of her backs it up...
that scenario failz....


Veronica: its more like 11 now... and i sort of accidentally went stealth... ive just not told anyone in months.... Ive not done RLE yet... ive not even seen a therapist...
R

[Veronica Secret]

Oh you just have your own definition of stealth.

[Rachael]

stealth to me = nobody thinks or sees anything but a girl... which they do. a few friends know, my coursemates, teachers, and boss and staff at work dont know... thats as good as i get right now...
R

[Veronica Secret]

As I said, you have your own definition of stealth.

[Rachael]

stealth isnt something that you have to do in a certain way...
people not knowing, is people not knowing. whichever way you look at it.
stealth doesnt require a certain process before that, or a checklist to be completed before you can.
if your m2f, and nobody can see anything but a girl, your legally you, i dont see what CANT be stealth?
R

[Berliegh]

So take a genetic female, and force her to wear a I WAS BORN A MALE t-shirt the rest of her life... so she can no longer "pass."

Will she never REALLY be living as a woman from then on? Is she only an AS IF woman now?

~Kate~

tbh, i dont think people would believe it, she would still pass as female, poeple would think it a joke... she will be living as a woman, because she IS... NOBODY will take a teeshirt seriously unless the rest of her backs it up...
that scenario failz....


Veronica: its more like 11 now... and i sort of accidentally went stealth... ive just not told anyone in months.... Ive not done RLE yet... ive not even seen a therapist...
R

You are absolutely right Rachael......a t shirt means nothing....it's what's seen physically.....and the T shirt comment would be seen as a bad joke......that would also be seen as a back joke on a passable TS....who would be percieved a a genetic female pretending to be TS...

[cindybc]

"You say po-tay-ta I say po-taa-ta. and they say tommytoes in Tennessee.

Cindy

[NicholeW.]

"You say po-tay-ta I say po-taa-ta. and they say tommytoes in Tennessee.

Cindy

*grin* those are the lil tiny ones, Cindy!! We call 'em grape tomatoes up this way.


Nichole

[Shana A]

"You say po-tay-ta I say po-taa-ta. and they say tommytoes in Tennessee.

Cindy

*grin* those are the lil tiny ones, Cindy!! We call 'em grape tomatoes up this way.

Nichole

They're called cherry tomatoes here. 

y2g

[Chynna]

It's very possible..........

The (what I term as "normal" people LMAO) i have encounter take you for what you carrrier yourself has......
If you act like a woman and carry yourself as such then you are preceived as just that even with a full beard and a three piece business suit

and lets not forget even the most "Passable" of us  DO NOT Pass 100% of the time.

(remember theres always someone who knew you before transitioning)

[cindybc]

Personality and attitude are my best friends when it comes to dealing with people out there. After all how can someone think of giving you a hard time if their to busy laughing their backside off.

Cindy