No google ain't quite as friendly as what you may think.
Actually we all have different personalities. Everyone, not just you. Yeah DPD used to be called MPD. But at work do you not have a different personality than at home and at home a different personality than with friends away from home? I know psychiatrists that don't think Borderline personality disorder is uncommon. Actually more normal than not. Our personality is what helps us function in varying social environments in the world and society. People have emotions and getting pissed is a more healthy emotion than not. Holding anger in is not that healthy and will lead to other problems later on. So being so nice and proper all the time is actually a health hazard but most office jobs require it. Good bosses and supervisors know this.
Actually to be completely honest I know what it is. I think it is totally normal. A lot of times when it comes to being trans, most of the therapists unless they are trans themselves can't explain it because most don't hold a degree in Psychology but rather counseling or whatever else with a passing knowledge of the human mind. If the mind is just a manifestation of the brain then there are a lot of things we can't explain. But when you see the brain as a physical manifestation of the mind then a lot can be explained yet not verified or proven beyond a shadow of a doubt.
Remember Google is your friend. The belief in reincarnation has been around a lot longer than the belief in one life redemption. I don't want to get spiritual or anything like that in your post but what if who you were born is not actually who you are on a much deeper level? There are actual psychologists with PHDs that have studied this and it is Taboo pretty much by the AMA and most if not all psychiatrists. Carl Jung if you read some of his works hinted at this too. Het we have Freudian slips. and Sigmund was know to partake a little especially with the COKE. They both worked together for a while until Jung thought the mind was deeper than just the brain.
I work close with a couple of psychiatrists yet I am mostly a parapsychologist and when all else fails they call me. There are a lot of things that can lead to paranoia, things that go bump in the night and so on. Sometimes medicine is the cure, sometimes it is not. When it is not they call me with the permission of their patients. I investigate everything from the history of where they reside to the geological locations to religious affiliations and so on. You would be surprised at how living close to a microwave tower can effect some people if they live within 500 yards of it. It is the same with wiring that was installed in the teens, 20's, 30s, and all the way up to new houses. A "Fear Cage" is a bitch. Even Poltergeist activity I have investigated and there is one common theme. Appx. 95 percent I can find an explanation for. But there is the other 5 percent that I can't explain other than the realm of parapsychological or paranormal.
Look it took a while to get to my point but this is it. Maybe we are more in tune with who we are aside from a physical being that has whatever between our legs. Maybe we are seeing something bigger than what we should be according to modern society. There are cultures that have and still accept us but they aren't Western now. Native American nations would accept us and even take us as wives. Other cultures have used us when it came to the masculinity and then when no longer needed cast us aside. There are cultures within India but the more Western they become, the more they are cast aside. Google it because this isn't something new. And yes ancient Rome had their fair share of gay sex but that is just physical sex though. In the case of Berdaches I have no idea if the men that would take them as wives had sex with them but they were wives of great warriors, Chiefs and were respected and loved just like any other wife or wives. now they are called "two spirit". No one Spirit in the wrong body but still accepted on a deeper level of who they truly were.
Just Google Berdache. They were here way before the white people ever set foot in the Americas. God gave Joan of Arc great qualities to save her/his people yet the Church when Joan was no longer needed "crucified" him/her.
When it comes to "two spirits" that is modern European Societal Norms connecting our Tue Spirits with hour bodies. I seriously doubt the native American people called us Berdaches because that sounds more like French language than Native American languages.
So... We are timeless. We have always been here. We will always be here. We are nothing new and just because we are trans should not be any big deal. Yet it is. It seems to be a big deal now even on Reservations. I used to deliver to a lot of reservations when it came to driving trucks. One company it was transformers for electricity and the other Slot machines. The ones with the slots especially in the east did not care or didn't even know because they were mostly white. One of the biggest reservations out west, the man unloading my transformers called the elders. They asked me to talk. OK? I love to talk. But they did not use the word Berdache though. I won't even say it. But actually I was their guest because it was getting rare for them. But I was treated with so much respect and with so much hospitality. They told me a lot of stuff but just don't see it anymore because of society now days. They were my last stop so I took days off to learn and tell them about me. I am 1/4 Cheyenne. Unfortunately I never heard any stories from my grandfather but his stories from my grandmother which was mostly English. Of course the younger generations could care less but the elders did care. They told me that I was always welcome there with them. But what is the big deal? Even with The People, if most of society won't accept me then why would the younger generations there accept me when they are listening to rap and hooked on drugs and I ain't talking peyote or crazy weed either.
There are so many cultures that have accepted and admired us throughout history little be known. In France, The UK, the eastern block countries, and so on since everyone thinks Europe is so grand, how many trans can live openly in that area? Since most Americans have Native American blood in them we can sort of. Baily, Kimber, Nicole and so on. Yes they have the whole ideal of sex behind them by most if not all that watch them. But what about Laverne Cox and Jazz Jennings and others liky you and me? No one watches them or us on porn sights so... We can still live openly though. I think most people get it even if they refuse to.
So never let anyone get you down. Don't even let life get you down. And never let someone else's' mind and small thinking get you down. You can always move to a more accepting area and do the same work.
If ever you get down, just always remember that you and we are all special and society is changing but it takes a little time and then there is always one "asswipe" that you will always have to put up with so don't let them have the satisfaction. Do exactly like you did with me and put me in my place.
Sorry for the long post but like you told me, Google what I told you too about history and cultures. We have been here since forever and will remain until the end of time. There is no need to let it get to you and affect you. That was easy to say but hard to do. I know.
