Okay so a long over due update. I probably won't remember to put everything in here or have the time because so much is happening.
I just had my third session of clearing on my genitals and ouch is it swollen and sore this time. I do enjoy getting the time to talk with my technician though and keep her apprised on the happenings in my life. She claims it's better than a soap opera. I'm not sure it's quite that dramatic, but yeah it is interesting. I haven't been posting about a fairly major thing going on lately, though I have messaged a few of you about it.
I have been spending an incredible large amount of time with my friend Amber (yes we share a name so be prepared for confusion). At first it was just fun and casual drinking, but I kept getting signals that she was attracted to me. I didn't do anything with that information at first. Eventually when she was drunk one night she admitted that she was incredibly attracted to me. I had to admit that I was attracted to her as well. This signed a conversation with my wife about the status of our marriage and what the rules on other people were. Surprisingly, she was amenable to the idea of a very limited open marriage.
I discussed that with Amber and neither of us have done anything to forward because quite frankly we don't believe her. In the interim we have hung out a lot. She came over and helped us clean our house. She had babysat the kids for us (she is so good with them). The kids are smitten and always asking if she is coming over or if we can go to her house.
She and my wife have had multiple opportunities to hang out, just the two of them. She really likes her and enjoys her company. After probing a good bit I finally got my wife to admit that yes she is jealous and really wishes she could hate her, but she can't. The only reason she agreed to anything was because she felt like I would do something behind her back anyway. She's not entirely wrong. I've been known for being impulsive and making really poor decisions in the past.
Nothing really had happened between the two of us yet. We did kiss twice and I did admit this to my wife. Just wow, I haven't been kissed like that in years. We have slept in the same bed on a few occasions and cuddled a bit, but that's it. My wife knows about that too. In fact the one night the whole family slept over at her place and she flat out told me to go sleep in her bed rather than wake the baby up at some good forsaken hot when I decided to come to bed.
This is where a snag comes up. Amber has a twin sister, who is kind of a bitch. She walked by and saw us in the same bed (we were both clothed and just sleeping) and there a conniption. Seriously like a huge to hour argument complete with misgendering and lots of personal attacks. Amber was completely mortified. Personally, I don't care what her sister thinks of me and want only really concerned about how upset Amber was over it. Sara and I went back out after her sister went to work. The whole family was extremely upset with her sister. We managed to lift her spirits, though she can't understand how I want upset.
The honest truth is I do have feelings for her being just attraction. She is an incredible sweetheart. My wife likes her too. Unfortunately, I don't know how anything will play out. Right now I'm not doing anything and just keeping all these balls juggling in the air until I know how things will settle. It's not an eventually, but a very strong probability that something will happen eventually.
It's so if because we are so close to a polyamory situation, but not quite. This just leaves everything complicated. It doesn't help that this girl is only 21 and incredibly attractive to boot. That can't be helping the jealousy issue. Fwiw I continually easier my wife that I love her and will be with her forever no matter what. It's so amusing that when I was a single guy I had horrible luck with ladies, but now I can't seem to about this kind of situation. I guess I am muscling in on Danielle's monopoly on the relationship drama [emoji23]
