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Kathy's journey

Started by KathyLauren, December 05, 2017, 05:19:10 PM

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Jayne01

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 16, 2018, 06:05:45 AM
Thanks, Jayne and Donna.  The obituary won't be changed.  Through family connections, my wife learned that it was written by his mother, who has always been non-accepting of his transition.  The misgendering was deliberate.  So sad.
OMG! That is so sad. I am having trouble comprehending such a deliberate act of cruelty.
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KathyLauren

Quote from: Jayne01 on May 16, 2018, 07:23:45 AM
OMG! That is so sad. I am having trouble comprehending such a deliberate act of cruelty.
Yeah, me too.  One final twist of the knife.  That actually made me sadder than his passing.  And angry.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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steph2.0

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 16, 2018, 06:05:45 AM
Thanks, Jayne and Donna.  The obituary won't be changed.  Through family connections, my wife learned that it was written by his mother, who has always been non-accepting of his transition.  The misgendering was deliberate.  So sad.

That is one of the saddest things I've heard. He died after being forced to choose between being true to himself, and his mother's love. It's just terrible!


- Stephanie


Assigned male at birth 1958 * Began envying sister 1963 * Knew unquestioningly that I was female 1968 * Acted the male part for 50 years * Meltdown and first therapist session May 2017 * Began HRT 6/21/17 * Out to the world 10/13/17 * Name Change 12/7/2017 (Girl Harbor Day) * FFS With FacialTeam 12/4/2018 * Facelift and Lipo Body Sculpting at Ocean Clinic 6/13-14/2019 * GCS with Marci Bowers 9/25/2019
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KathyLauren

#343
Yesterday evening, my wife and I went to the town's ceremony of raising the rainbow flag for IDAHoTB.  I like the fact that a little place in what is considered a very rural area can make a public display of supporting queer communities.  Attendance was decent: perhaps 100 or 150 people.  Several trans people, mostly LGB people, and quite a few apparently straight people.  Anything that normalizes our existence is a good thing.  The mayor comes across as smarmy, but his support seems genuine.

[edit] Pics or it didn't happen...  That's me in the red jacket, centre-left, with my wife to my right.

(Still from NSLive TV video report by Brian Cottam)
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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Jayne01

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 17, 2018, 11:35:31 AM
Yesterday evening, my wife and I went to the town's ceremony of raising the rainbow flag for IDAHoTB.  I like the fact that a little place in what is considered a very rural area can make a public display of supporting queer communities.  Attendance was decent: perhaps 100 or 150 people.  Several trans people, mostly LGB people, and quite a few apparently straight people.  Anything that normalizes our existence is a good thing.  The mayor comes across as smarmy, but his support seems genuine.

[edit] Pics or it didn't happen...  That's me in the red jacket, centre-left, with my wife to my right.

(Still from NSLive TV video report by Brian Cottam)
Kathy, it is very cool that your small community displays such support. Silly question, what is IDAHoTB?

Jayne
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KathyLauren

IDAHoTB = International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia.  Originally called IDAHo because it made a cute acronym, they later added the T and B.

Yes, that particular town is a pretty civilized place.  The fact that university students almost outnumber permanent residents keeps it interesting.  It's about a half-hour drive from our tiny village.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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steph2.0

Quote from: Jayne01 on May 17, 2018, 04:50:26 PM
Kathy, it is very cool that your small community displays such support. Silly question, what is IDAHoTB?

Jayne

Thank you, Jayne. I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't get it. I had to look it up. International Day Against Homophobia Transphobia, and Biphobia.

Stephanie


Assigned male at birth 1958 * Began envying sister 1963 * Knew unquestioningly that I was female 1968 * Acted the male part for 50 years * Meltdown and first therapist session May 2017 * Began HRT 6/21/17 * Out to the world 10/13/17 * Name Change 12/7/2017 (Girl Harbor Day) * FFS With FacialTeam 12/4/2018 * Facelift and Lipo Body Sculpting at Ocean Clinic 6/13-14/2019 * GCS with Marci Bowers 9/25/2019
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Jayne01

Thank you Kathy and Steph for the definition. My little brain is being overloaded with acronyms.
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steph2.0

Quote from: Jayne01 on May 17, 2018, 05:10:08 PM
Thank you Kathy and Steph for the definition. My little brain is being overloaded with acronyms.

I know! Too many TLAs, FLAs, and now SLAs!

Stephanie


Assigned male at birth 1958 * Began envying sister 1963 * Knew unquestioningly that I was female 1968 * Acted the male part for 50 years * Meltdown and first therapist session May 2017 * Began HRT 6/21/17 * Out to the world 10/13/17 * Name Change 12/7/2017 (Girl Harbor Day) * FFS With FacialTeam 12/4/2018 * Facelift and Lipo Body Sculpting at Ocean Clinic 6/13-14/2019 * GCS with Marci Bowers 9/25/2019
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Jayne01

Quote from: Steph2.0 on May 17, 2018, 05:23:41 PM
I know! Too many TLAs, FLAs, and now SLAs!

Stephanie
TLA = Thrust Lever Angle
FLA = Flap Lever Angle
SLA = ?

I can list hundreds more. And then it depends who came up with the acronym, the same letters can mean different things.

FCU (Boeing) = Fuel Control Unit
FCU (Airbus) = Flight Control Unit

Sorry Kathy, I got carried away with plane talk again.


Jayne
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KathyLauren

Quote from: Steph2.0 on May 17, 2018, 05:23:41 PM
I know! Too many TLAs, FLAs, and now SLAs!

Stephanie
Ha!  I thought you had to attend DECUS to know what a TLA is.  (DECUS was the annual convention for users of Digital Equipment Corporation computers, now defunct.)  DECcies know about them.

OK, I'll take pity on poor Jayne...

TLA = Three Letter Acronym.
FLA = Four Letter Acronym.
etc.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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steph2.0

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 17, 2018, 05:36:53 PM
Ha!  I thought you had to attend DECUS to know what a TLA is.  (DECUS was the annual convention for users of Digital Equipment Corporation computers, now defunct.)  DECcies know about them.

OK, I'll take pity on poor Jayne...

TLA = Three Letter Acronym.
FLA = Four Letter Acronym.
etc.

One of my favorites, especially applicable to movie and TV producers in the 70s who showed computers, was FLI.

Flash Lights Impressively

Stephanie


Assigned male at birth 1958 * Began envying sister 1963 * Knew unquestioningly that I was female 1968 * Acted the male part for 50 years * Meltdown and first therapist session May 2017 * Began HRT 6/21/17 * Out to the world 10/13/17 * Name Change 12/7/2017 (Girl Harbor Day) * FFS With FacialTeam 12/4/2018 * Facelift and Lipo Body Sculpting at Ocean Clinic 6/13-14/2019 * GCS with Marci Bowers 9/25/2019
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Jayne01

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 17, 2018, 05:36:53 PM
TLA = Three Letter Acronym.
FLA = Four Letter Acronym.
etc.
No, no, no!!!! They are aviation acronyms!!! They are, they really, really are!!!

I suppose I can accept your version as well. [emoji16]

Jayne
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KathyLauren

I took our car to the dealer this morning to get serviced.  They have my proper name on file, and call me Kathy or Miss Walker when I go there.

It occurred to me how much visibility I get there.  The counter staff in the service department know me.  The sales staff in the showroom don't know who I am, but they know that I have killed time in there, and that I drive an older model, so will be a potential customer in a few years.  From them, management will know that they have a regular customer who is transgender.  So, if the mechanics on the shop floor start talking trash about trans people, they are going to hear about it from management: "We have a trans customer, so don't be talking like that." 

That is not a bad way to normalize our presence in society at large, just by going out and being myself.  I like that.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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christinej78

Hi Kathy,                18 May 2018

How's the 800 foot driveway coming along? You do know you could have it paved for a couple hundred.... thousand dollars.

Best Always,
Christine
Veteran - US Navy                                       Arborist, rigger, climber, sawyer
Trans Woman 13 Apr 18                               LEO (Cop)
Living as female - 7 years                             Pilot
Start HRT san's AA's 27 March 2018              Mechanic
Borchiday completed Friday 13 Apr 2018        Engineer Multi Discipline
IT Management Consultant                            Programmer
Friend                                                          Bum, Bumett
Semi Retired                                                Still Enjoy Being a Kid, Refuse to Grow UP
Former Writer / Editor                                   Carpenter / Plumber / Electrician
Ex-Biker, Ex-Harley Driver                             Friend of a Coyote
Ex-Smoker 50 years and heading for 100
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Jayne01

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 18, 2018, 11:44:12 AM
That is not a bad way to normalize our presence in society at large, just by going out and being myself.  I like that.
That is a great way to look at things. Just be yourself. We are normal people, living normal lives. Only thing that makes us different is that many of us get the opportunity to experience life in two genders.

Jayne
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KathyLauren

Quote from: christinej78 on May 18, 2018, 02:10:17 PM
Hi Kathy,                18 May 2018

How's the 800 foot driveway coming along? You do know you could have it paved for a couple hundred.... thousand dollars.

Best Always,
Christine
It's pretty much done for this season.  The worst of the bumps are smoothed out.  It's still not quite as smooth as I'd like it, but it will smooth itself out when it softens up in next year's thaw.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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Donna

I don't know what my sister paid but there drive is 1/2 a mile from the highway to the house. That would suck if the plow quit in the winter.
December 2015 noticed strange feelings moving in
December 2016 started to understand what my body has been telling me all my life, started wearing a bra for comfort full time
Spiro and dutastricide 2017
Mid year 2017 Started dressing and going out shopping etc by myself
October T 14.8 / 456
Came out to my wife in December 2017
January 2018 dressing androgenes and still have face hair
Feb 2018 Dressing full time in female clothing out at work and to friends and family, clean shaven and make up
Living full time March 1 2018
March T 7.4 / 236
April 19th eligard injection, no more Testosterone
June 19th a brand new freshly trained HRT and transgender care doctor for me. Only a one day waiting list to become her patient 😍

[/
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LizK

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 17, 2018, 11:35:31 AM
Yesterday evening, my wife and I went to the town's ceremony of raising the rainbow flag for IDAHoTB.  I like the fact that a little place in what is considered a very rural area can make a public display of supporting queer communities.  Attendance was decent: perhaps 100 or 150 people.  Several trans people, mostly LGB people, and quite a few apparently straight people.  Anything that normalizes our existence is a good thing.  The mayor comes across as smarmy, but his support seems genuine.



Its always great to receive that kind of public affirmation. It also gives you a gauge on how others are reacting to our community. Sounds to me that your community is a very forgiving and open one. I agree with you...anything that does normalise us is a good thing...we just need more of them!!

Take care

Liz
Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016,
Fulltime from 8 March 2017,
GCS 4 December 2018
Voice Surgery 01 February 2019
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christinej78

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 18, 2018, 04:53:24 PM
It's pretty much done for this season.  The worst of the bumps are smoothed out.  It's still not quite as smooth as I'd like it, but it will smooth itself out when it softens up in next year's thaw.

Hi Kathy,                 18 May 2018

Are you saying it hasn't thawed out yet? It was over 100° f here today; nothing frozen in sight.

Best Always, Love,
Christine
Veteran - US Navy                                       Arborist, rigger, climber, sawyer
Trans Woman 13 Apr 18                               LEO (Cop)
Living as female - 7 years                             Pilot
Start HRT san's AA's 27 March 2018              Mechanic
Borchiday completed Friday 13 Apr 2018        Engineer Multi Discipline
IT Management Consultant                            Programmer
Friend                                                          Bum, Bumett
Semi Retired                                                Still Enjoy Being a Kid, Refuse to Grow UP
Former Writer / Editor                                   Carpenter / Plumber / Electrician
Ex-Biker, Ex-Harley Driver                             Friend of a Coyote
Ex-Smoker 50 years and heading for 100
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