Larry, the Guy who Runs Cables
Yesterday at work, I had had a meeting scheduled for me with a contractor whom I had worked with extensively in the past. I hadn't had any contact with him for at least 5 years. It's been a while since I had to do something like this but, seeing as how this is the new normal, it was like any other business meeting.
I got along with him before, so there shouldn't be any problem now, right? ...Right? Hello?
Since our manager had set up the meeting, I had no idea when the guy was going to show up. All I had to go on was that he'd be here "this morning, but call him to find out when.". Great. Not what I was expecting but okay. Without even pausing to think about it, I put on my headset, dialed his number (from our help line, in case he still had my old name tied to my phone number in his contacts list), and put on my best voice I could manage. He answered, I introduced myself, and we talked about when and where to meet.
"Is your office still at <MAIN BUILDING>?"
Uh-oh. I guess he does know who he's talking to. No sweat, I can do this. Keep going.
"Yes it is, on the first floor."
"All right. if you want, you can just ride with me and we'll go out to the sites where you need cables dropped - or you can take your own vehicle and just meet me there. It's up to you."
Sensing no perceptible awkwardness, I replied "Sure, I can ride with you. That'll make it easier."
We said goodbye and then I texted my manager to ask just how much about me he told the guy. He said, "Only the basics, to explain the last name."
A little vague, but okay.
For this day, I had dressed a little nicer in my gray and black sleeveless color block dress - mainly in the hope of once again seeing that dawning of realization of exactly who this beautiful woman they were talking to actually is. 'Twas not to be, I suppose. Oh well. Moving on.
As I approached his truck, he got out and started walking toward the building entrance. Then he saw me and after a few steps, realized who was heading his way. I smiled and waved as I would with any prior acquaintance - at least these days.
At one point, I had wondered if when encountering people I knew or folks I was just meeting for the first time, whether or not I was giving them a friendly smile or if I had sometimes unconsciously reverted back to the old tight-lipped almost-grimace. It turns out that no, that look never wants to come out anymore. I do smile at people and quite unconsciously too. How about that?
Back to the story...
After a friendly greeting, I got in the truck with him and we headed to our first stop. When we arrived and I reached down to my purse, he said something, the significance of which didn't quite register immediately.
"It's okay honey, you can leave that in here. I'll lock the doors."
"Okay, let me just grab my keys for the building."
Rewind a moment. He said, "It's okay honey...". Knowing full well who I was before and he still reflexively addressed me as he would have (I assume) any other woman. Wow! Simply WOW!
It's moments like that which cause me to question any feelings or notions that people see that I'm trans and either don't care or are just being nice. It's one of those affirming moments that you file away carefully so as to enjoy it over and over again.
As we went around to the other facilities and chatted about other folks we used to work with on both sides and occasionally touched on something relevant to the job at hand. After a few hours, we decided to go somewhere for lunch (he insisted on buying). It was then that we got to address the elephant in the room. It was one of those educational moments because he knew very little about trans folks or any of what we go through, so I laid it all out for him and got caught up on all that had happened in the intervening years.
After lunch, we were back on the road to visit the last few sites and then we were back in my office, going over some final details about the job.
He even gave me a hug as we parted ways.
The day was a bit of a whirlwind, albeit a rewarding one.
