My friend wants to do DIY castration, what should I do?

[belgianchloe_97]

I've had a close friend who is 2 years older than me Me (19) Him (21). We met in an autistic group for kids with difficulty making friends. At first, we didn't think there was much in common but later we discovered that we both surprisingly have gender dysphoria. In my area, transgender teens are not very known about.  I only began to dress in a feminine manner but he's been doing it since he was 17.

We share views also on many things but one viewpoint that I don't share with him is his desire to perform DIY castration. From our long discussions, he said that ever since he was 14, he's been attempting castration; First with "chemical" means (applying toilet bleach, correction fluid, caustic chemicals), then "mechanical" means (rubber band, binder clip) and then finally "electromagnetic" means (microwave). All these failed for him because of the intense pain. Despite this, he didn't injure his testicles.

He said that he felt extraordinarily happy (almost manic, slept 4 hours and felt fine) the year he tried to castrate himself because he felt it would lead to a sense of freedom and allow him to focus on his schoolwork. When he failed, he apparently because very low slowly after that date and the year that followed was one of the worst to date. He attempted suicide for the first time by trying to electrocute himself with the microwave. He was dismissed from school for disturbing peers with suicidal thoughts

After a few psychiatric interventions along with more freedom when he turned 18, he's sort of "fine" (don't think that word fits him tbh) but at least he's not suicidal; his desire for what some doctors consider endangering himself with self surgery is higher than ever since now he can purchase chemicals online to aid his castration and penis amputation attempt.



What are some LOGICAL arguments I can use against this? I'm personally not going down the DIY route...except (but reluctant) for hormones but If I did, I would definitely NOT plan on injecting them or anything.

He's trying to downplay what he's doing by comparing it to taking hormones which he heard that some other transgender people recommend but I don't think that's a dangerous comparison.

He's turned down the possibility of going down SRS route for the moment as he said he has a trans-phobic family along with the fact that the surgery is so expensive even with insurance. He doesn't have a job, no friends except me, almost about to fail his further education college course for not attending, psychiatrists believe he's a drug seeker for forging a benzo prescription so...things don't look to good but If you can tell me anything to keep his head up then it would be great.


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[Lady Sarah]

Your friend may be committing suicide by attempting such measures. Take necessary measures, and get that friend to some counseling.

[KathyLauren]

Hi, Chloe.  Your friend is in need of serious psychiatric help.  Do your best to convince them not to go through with their plan.  At best, it will destroy any hopes of successful GRS in the future.  At worst, the attempt would be fatal.

[Cassi]

I totally agree with the ladies comments before mine.  You need to get your friend medical help and right away. 

[AnonyMs]

The logical reason is its very dangerous. If he put that all the effort and drive into saving money he could get a surgeon to do it instead. Might take a while but its a guaranteed result.

By the way, overdosing on paracetamol (and codeine usually has paracetamol mixed in) is fatal. Once you've done it there's no way to fix it and you're dead in 24 hours. Apparently its a very unpleasant way to go.

[plastic-mayhem]

Absolutely terrible idea (not that you weren't already aware)

I don't one hundred percent understand the intended procedure as described, but what I did grasp of it is gruesome at best.  Infection could go systemic first of all, second, it doesnt sound like your friend really has a firm understanding of this type of procedure...miscalculation of dosage could lead to overdose.......and that's the tip of the iceberg.

I would reccomend talking to your friend about alternatives.  There are ways of fighting testosterone for someone who cannot yet get orchiectomy....your friend could pursue HRT or at the very least cause a favorable increase in estrogen via diet, lifestyle and supplementation......there are herbs and other compounds that are antiandrogens, even some otc drugs that can yield strong antiandrogen effects (certain nsaid's even...)

the kind of diy castration your friend is considerinng would likely at best lead to permanent disability and incontinence, and death probably isn't even the worst possible result of botching this procedure

[Cindy]

Your friend needs psychiatric help and please counsel them to seek it ASAP.

What they are contemplating has a high likelihood of death or worse living in a maimed state that will not benefit their outlook.

[belgianchloe_97]

Your friend needs psychiatric help and please counsel them to seek it ASAP.

What they are contemplating has a high likelihood of death or worse living in a maimed state that will not benefit their outlook.

He's currently seeing various psychiatrists in a mental health clinic who he has shared his castration desires with but they don't seem to take it seriously. Perhaps they don't think he has the actual intent but I know that he definitely does.

Would it be worth trying to "scare" him by showing him images of people who had failed attempts and became disabled as you say?

[Cindy]

Your friend needs psychiatric help and please counsel them to seek it ASAP.

What they are contemplating has a high likelihood of death or worse living in a maimed state that will not benefit their outlook.

He's currently seeing various psychiatrists in a mental health clinic who he has shared his castration desires with but they don't seem to take it seriously. Perhaps they don't think he has the actual intent but I know that he definitely does.

Would it be worth trying to "scare" him by showing him images of people who had failed attempts and became disabled as you say?

I think it more beneficial to contact his clinic and inform them of his intent.

I'm concerned from where you may have access of such images.

[belgianchloe_97]

I think it more beneficial to contact his clinic and inform them of his intent.

I'm concerned from where you may have access of such images.

Oh I mean images from Google. Not from any dodgy websites. One poster did say that it could lead to a permanent disability. Maybe he needs to see what trying to perform self-surgery can do..just a thought.

I live in Western Europe (not specifying because I want to protect his identity) but unlike the US, I don't believe psychiatrists here have much power to detain patients. You could literally talk of a suicide attempt last week and so long as you didn't appear to immediately pose a threat to yourself or someone else, they'd almost certainly dismiss you. The police are the only ones who can make a threat assessment and force someone to go to the doctor.

Is it worth calling them?

[Cassi]

If you provide the information you have provided to this forum to the police, I think they'll see the need.

[Lady Sarah]

Your friend certainly needs protection from self harm, no matter what you have to do. Otherwise, is is highly likely you will lose that friend forever.

[soandso]

Perhaps you could help your friend shift her focus from self castration to working toward a goal of legitimate surgical transition. I believe the tissue she is attempting to remove will be needed to complete a successful transition. Perhaps you could arrange a consultation with a surgeon to discuss the options? It may take a while to save money but a clear goal and plans for achieving it may help her shift focus away from dangerous actions.

It sounds as if she is also bothered by her libido. Estrogen therapy acts as an anaphrodisiac. If that is not an option there are other medications that are used to lower libido or "chemical castration". 

I agree that it would be good to share your concerns and knowledge of previous attempts with the therapist and perhaps any supportive family members. Your friend is lucky to have you as a support, however, this is too large a burden to carry alone.  My heart goes out to you both.


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[Cora]

So, my spouse was recently obsessed with suicide and it got to a point where it was like ze was trying to convince hirself it was the logical solution. Unfortunately for hir, it's not, and getting new medication helped stopped those thoughts.

Your friend sounds like they like to make a lot of plans to hurt themselves. I'm not sure if your friend can be reasoned with, but if they are on meds helping them think less about suicide, perhaps now's the time.

Since your friend likes thinking about ways to change their body, I would give your friend reading material about what hormones and surgery could do for them. Yes, this costs money, but also your friend sounds like a planner, so that should be right up their alley. Maybe you two can come up with a plan together? You two deserve to be happy in the bodies that match your identity.