Bari Jo's Corner

[Bari Jo]

That's a fair cop as they say in Monty Python.  My sister came by for her monthly week at my place last night.  She gave me her Xmas gift too, which is some MAC cosmetics which I would never buy for myself and a sweater.  The sweater was wonderfully soft and just slightly girly.  I'm not sure if it's too tight. she says it's perfect.  I took it off and it's a size six.  I'm 5'6.5" and weigh 150.  Am I a size six?  I don't know enough on girls sizes, but I thought I'd be at minimum a size 8.  I think maybe she was just being nice.

Bari Jo

[KathyLauren]

Don't fret about sizes.  I'm anywhere from an 8 to a 12, depending on the garment.  The size number is just a first approximation.  The only way to know if it fits is to try it on and see how it looks.

[Bari Jo]

Still nothing from HR.  Its pike a black hole.  You'd think any email that mentioned being transgender would get their interest.  Argh, waiting game.

Bari Jo

[Cassi]

Still nothing from HR.  Its pike a black hole.  You'd think any email that mentioned being transgender would get their interest.  Argh, waiting game.

Bari Jo

Too bad your e-mail didn't have an acknowledgement, e-mail read type of function you could have used to ensure it was read.

[Bari Jo]

Nothing new from HR, but I do have some updates worth saying.  Since my last Spiro lowering, I feel myself getting impatient.  I don't like it one bit.  On the other hand, my sister had a long talk about me with my dad last night.  One of the things that came up with is my impatience now is almost gone.  I seem calm and happy to them. I still think I may ask my doctor to increase Spiro.  My next labs are in four weeks, don't think I can hold out till then.

Tonight I am getting my eyebrows threaded.  My sister is also going to tell me about the whole talk with my dad.  I'm looking forward to it and dreading it.  I've noticed Dad is having a hard time relating to me.  Relearning is tough on the family.

Bari Jo

[Jessica]

Nothing new from HR, but I do have some updates worth saying.  Since my last Spiro lowering, I feel myself getting impatient.  I don't like it one bit.  On the other hand, my sister had a long talk about me with my dad last night.  One of the things that came up with is my impatience now is almost gone.  I seem calm and happy to them. I still think I may ask my doctor to increase Spiro.  My next labs are in four weeks, don't think I can hold out till then.

Tonight I am getting my eyebrows threaded.  My sister is also going to tell me about the whole talk with my dad.  I'm looking forward to it and dreading it.  I've noticed Dad is having a hard time relating to me.  Relearning is tough on the family.

Bari Jo

Impatience was a problem I had before starting HT.  I am much more likely to take my time instead of rushing around trying to get 20 things done in the time it's takes to do 10. 

Let us know how your threading goes...I'm definitely interested.

[Roll]

I've noticed Dad is having a hard time relating to me.  Relearning is tough on the family.

That's one upside to never having really related to my dad in the first place I suppose.

[Megan.]

Nothing new from HR, but I do have some updates worth saying.  Since my last Spiro lowering, I feel myself getting impatient.  I don't like it one bit.  On the other hand, my sister had a long talk about me with my dad last night.  One of the things that came up with is my impatience now is almost gone.  I seem calm and happy to them. I still think I may ask my doctor to increase Spiro.  My next labs are in four weeks, don't think I can hold out till then.

Tonight I am getting my eyebrows threaded.  My sister is also going to tell me about the whole talk with my dad.  I'm looking forward to it and dreading it.  I've noticed Dad is having a hard time relating to me.  Relearning is tough on the family.

Bari Jo

I think there is an expectation from us, that when we take a big step (coming out etc..) that things will pick up speed. The reality is that they can often slow back down again for a while. Don't feel negative about this, it'll give you and your family time to acclimatise to this new reality. Give your dad time and space to adjust. X

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[Bari Jo]

I just got back from the first sister outing.  We got my eyebrows threaded, had dinner and did some window shopping.  I'm amazed how completely at ease my sister is with this.  She's more comfortable than I am.  My brows look great too.

While waiting to get my brows done my sister related the full conversation with my dad.  He is fully accepting the science of my being trans.  He thinks chemically it was known from before I was born.  The amniocentesis showed the wrong gender both times tested.  He retold that story to my sister.  My sister brought up some of my most painful moments growing up to him and he was nearly in tears.  So my dad is accepting.  I think he will be supportive eventually too.

One of those moments was right when I was getting braces.  The dentist told me how tall I would be based on my X-ray's.  Keep in mind I was a short kid with gender issues internally and repressing hard.  I was then told that I would be a nice height for a girl, but short for a boy.  It was like god was even conspiring against me.  I cried for weeks.  That's one of my worst GD moments.  I'm glad my dad can empathize with me.

Bari Jo

[Bari Jo]

I might as well relate my threading experience too.  I did it at the mall, just after work.  My sister came with me to watch and encourage me.  I used my avatar picture for guidance.  The girl threading it, looked at it and said this will be easy you already have that shape.  I asked her to accentuate the arch and to make it thin like the picture.  This was my first time and didn't know what to expect.  She had me stretch my skin while she did the magic.  she placed my hands where she wanted me to stretch.  I was not expecting the pain, it does hurt a bit.  being the first time I kept thinking I'm going to be bleeding.  nope I was fine.  I did break out into a sweat, which made her laugh.  then the pain was causing me to giggle, which is a defence mechanism of mine.  by the end, it looks exactly like my avatar eyebrows.  I'm very happy with the results.  everybody at work today will be able to see them too, since I forgot my glasses:)

Bari Jo

[Megan.]

Awesome,  thank you for sharing, nice cleanly shaped brows are a quick and easy way to feminise the face!
I get mine done every 4-5 weeks with a bit of plucking in between to keep down the new growth. Like so many of these things, the pain just becomes part of the deal! X

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[Roll]

I just got back from the first sister outing.  We got my eyebrows threaded, had dinner and did some window shopping.  I'm amazed how completely at ease my sister is with this.  She's more comfortable than I am.  My brows look great too.

While waiting to get my brows done my sister related the full conversation with my dad.  He is fully accepting the science of my being trans.  He thinks chemically it was known from before I was born.  The amniocentesis showed the wrong gender both times tested.  He retold that story to my sister.  My sister brought up some of my most painful moments growing up to him and he was nearly in tears.  So my dad is accepting.  I think he will be supportive eventually too.

One of those moments was right when I was getting braces.  The dentist told me how tall I would be based on my X-ray's.  Keep in mind I was a short kid with gender issues internally and repressing hard.  I was then told that I would be a nice height for a girl, but short for a boy.  It was like god was even conspiring against me.  I cried for weeks.  That's one of my worst GD moments.  I'm glad my dad can empathize with me.

Bari Jo

I wish my sister was just a teensy bit older so I could have that experience too, it sounds amazing. (My sister is only 17, so regardless of being extremely supportive and loving, is still a teenager who doesn't want to be seen with family in public too often. )

I'm so happy your dad is coming along!

(And you gotta post a picture with brows done soon! )

[Laurie]

  Congrats on  the outing and the threading Bari Jo. When I had mine done I didn't think it was painful at all. It probably because I don't have that much to work with. I just abhor the thought of looking like my brows were drawn on so I'll make do with what little I have.
  I agree with the other that urge you to give Dad some more time and I believe he will come round just as you want him to. The bond between a parent and their child is a strong one unless some terrible things happened to loosen it. I doubt you will have to worry about that.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Jessica]

I'm so happy you are able to bond as sisters with your sibling!  It does appear you do have acceptance from your family!
I'm think of asking my daughter in law to shape my brows.  She does not know of my transition, but I think she would be open to it.

Jessica Marie

[Bari Jo]

Thanks everybody, Wow this journey is just wild.

Ellie: you will get those moments.  My sister asked me to do her nails since I am better at it than she is.  That's a little bonding activity you can do in the house.  The next outing she wants to go clothes shopping.  She says my style needs help!  I don't think I will be posting any picts till my facial hair is cleared.  I am having a bad time dealing with picts and the mirror, waiting till then.

Laurie: Yes!  I'm so happy they are accepting. I fully expect by next Xmas I will be out to the rest of the family, and it will go fine.  My family are mainly doctors and lawyers with the occasional artist in there.  The only one I was worried about is my dad, and it's going okay.  I'm truly blessed.  I know many families do not have this result.  Indeed if my older sister was still alive she would spite me and launch some kind of campaign to exclude me from the family.  Yes, she really was that awful

Jessica/Megan:  I encourage you to do as Megan and I are.  Threading is not expensive $15 at the shop I went to with tip.  It's fast too.  If your daughter in law does threading by all means go to her.  If she doesn't, bring her for guidance and morale.

Bari Jo

[Bari Jo]

And at 6:00 I got a meeting maker scheduled for Tuesday from HR.  Great, now I won't be able to sleep all weekend.

Bari Jo

[Cassi]

And at 6:00 I got a meeting maker scheduled for Tuesday from HR.  Great, now I won't be able to sleep all weekend.

Bari Jo

50/50 - 50 Good for you!  50 Not so good on not being able to sleep for the next three days

[Bari Jo]

I had cocktails at my gallery tonight with my neighbors.  I was able to show off all the hard work I've done.  It was super fun, full bar, plus I was the hostess.  I wasn't presenting beyond androgynous, but I did come out to one neighbors.  This neighbor works at my local lgbt center.  I knew I would have to eventually, so why not now.  I think one more of these and I might come out to more of my neighbors. We are really a tight warm community.

Bari Jo

[Megan.]

I had cocktails at my gallery tonight with my neighbors.  I was able to show off all the hard work I've done.  It was super fun, full bar, plus I was the hostess.  I wasn't presenting beyond androgynous, but I did come out to one neighbors.  This neighbor works at my local lgbt center.  I knew I would have to eventually, so why not now.  I think one more of these and I might come out to more of my neighbors. We are really a tight warm community.

Bari Jo

Awesome, glad it went well. But there is a glaring problem with this situation; there were cocktails but I didn't get an invite! It must have have got lost in the mail! [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

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[Bari Jo]

Awesome, glad it went well. But there is a glaring problem with this situation; there were cocktails but I didn't get an invite! It must have have got lost in the mail! [emoji23][emoji23][emoji23][emoji23]

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Aww, please don't feel excluded.  I want all my trans friends to know you have a standing invite.  You must like big fluffy poodles though!

Bari Jo