Bari Jo's Corner

[KathyLauren]

Today was the day I met with HR.

That is excellent, Bari Jo!  I am glad it went so well for you.  Surprising that a company that big didn't have a policy in place, but perhaps you will have a chance to influence the new policy they develop.

[Cassi]

Today was the day I met with HR.  I thought I'd feel weird about it, but I wasn't.  I thought for sure it would feel like I was watching it happen, but no.  I was in the moment and talked about presenting as female, using the bathrooms, going to doctors.  Speaking of.  I have been trying to work four days a week, 10 hour days.  My company won't do it, since I'd be paid overtime those days.  However they will allow me to work from home one day a week, and have me set those hours.  So that means I can have my doctors appts in the afternoons and not really miss any work since I'll start my day early in the mornings.  This means more electrolysis weekly, Yay!  I was asked about my preferred name, and they will help with name change when I want it.  I was surprised there wasn't a transition guide, since we do have 150,000 employees.  They said they would create one for my transition.  I feel fine abiut it, but also feel there's so much to do.

Bari Jo

Good for you Girl!

[Laurie]

Hi Bari Jo,

  I just caught back up on your thread. That lunch with Dad was awesome. I'm sure he will make progress himself with accepting you fully and become comfortable with your transition. I've heard it put that for a parent to fully accept somthing like this in a child they must first have time to grieve their loss of the child the raised. It will take some time to do that but he is trying as you said. Just feel the joy in that Bari.

  The HR meeting also sounds like it went as well as you could expect. Cheers.

Hugs,
   Laurie

[Bari Jo]

I got to thinking today if how far I've come.  It's been only about six months since really accepting myself.  I've come so far yet have so far to go.  It doesn't seem as scary any more although I still am terrified of not passing.  My next big leap in transition will be going to get my hairline restored.  That date cannot come fast enough.  Till then I'm working on mannerisms, which I think I might be close, or at least giving off a scared and vulnerable vibe.  I kind of like it and the attention I've gotten.  It's happened a couple times but the latest was yesterday.  I was in line at the post office and I forgot the address of where I was sending a package. So, I stepped out and texted my sister and had her find it for me while I waited.  I had two men come try and help me.  Then just befire I got the address a grandmother came up and told me "sweetie don't be afraid to go to the counter."  I was high from being coddled.  I felt like a lost little girl and these adults will help me.  What a great feeling.

Anyway, I'm going to work on that.  I know confidence is key to passing, but dang if this wasn't something too.

Bari Jo

[Laurie]

  Bari Jo,

  I will agree with you that the incident you related was confirming. If if had been me I might have gotten some young man to assist the old lady across the street. But they don't raise youngins to do things like that these days. They did in mine. I guess I've earned the old lady status. No I guess not really old yes but that's all I can claim.
(Sigh)

Laurie

[Bari Jo]

I am continuing to push the boundaries at work. Here's my latest.  I had a baking weekend a few weekends ago where I asked them which they'd rather me, bring in for the team.  This is the second time, and the second time using my name.  Nobody has said anything about the name.  What am I chopped liver?



Bari Jo

[Sarah_P]

I am continuing to push the boundaries at work. Here's my latest.  I had a baking weekend a few weekends ago where I asked them which they'd rather me, bring in for the team.  This is the second time, and the second time using my name.  Nobody has said anything about the name.  What am I chopped liver?



Bari Jo

Mmmm... that Green Tea Matcha Cake looks pretty good.....

[Megan.]

Ooo yummy,  good effort hun. X

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[Julia1996]

Oh wow. I would love to have the recipe for that green tea cake. I brought baked goods to work one year for the holidays. I don't know what happens to people at work when it comes to baked goods. They ended up accusing each other of hoarding cookies and I almost got my arm gnawed off when I tried to get my cookie tin back. I thought it was empty but it still had two cookies in it. What a bunch of animals! It's like they never ate before!

[steph2.0]

Oh wow. I would love to have the recipe for that green tea cake. I brought baked goods to work one year for the holidays. I don't know what happens to people at work when it comes to baked goods. They ended up accusing each other of hoarding cookies and I almost got my arm gnawed off when I tried to get my cookie tin back. I thought it was empty but it still had two cookies in it. What a bunch of animals! It's like they never ate before!

Here's how my wife and I fix that. It slows them down a little. [emoji12]



Stephanie

[Sarah_P]

Oh wow. I would love to have the recipe for that green tea cake. I brought baked goods to work one year for the holidays. I don't know what happens to people at work when it comes to baked goods. They ended up accusing each other of hoarding cookies and I almost got my arm gnawed off when I tried to get my cookie tin back. I thought it was empty but it still had two cookies in it. What a bunch of animals! It's like they never ate before!

Don't get between me and cake / cookies / pie! You take your life into your own hands if you do. 
We almost always have cheaper store-bought snacks around my work (left overs from story time & our adult coloring group). When someone brings something fresh baked, it's devoured in moments (not just by me!).

Here's how my wife and I fix that. It slows them down a little. [emoji12]



Stephanie

OMG, I need that!!

[Julia1996]

Here's how my wife and I fix that. It slows them down a little. [emoji12]



Stephanie

That's hilarious. But I doubt even that would deter my coworkers. When it comes to something homemade they are like a pack of piranhas.

[Bari Jo]

Oh wow. I would love to have the recipe for that green tea cake. I brought baked goods to work one year for the holidays. I don't know what happens to people at work when it comes to baked goods. They ended up accusing each other of hoarding cookies and I almost got my arm gnawed off when I tried to get my cookie tin back. I thought it was empty but it still had two cookies in it. What a bunch of animals! It's like they never ate before!

Here's the recipe I'm trying.  It's way easier than the sesame too.  Both of these are made in a rice cooker!

https://zairyo.sg/blogs/recipes/lazy-recipe-matcha-rice-cooker-cake-recipe

Yes, I love the way people get with home baked goods.

Bari Jo

[Bari Jo]

So, some good news even though it's kind of silly and unscientific.  I was looking at another person's thread and they posted a pict from how-old.net and it showed female.  So I decided to test my picture and it came up as female.  So then I backtracked picture by picture to find the picture that the software starts to identify me as female.  It looks like it started happening Dec 3.  I personally still see the boy in every mirror and picture, but gives me a little confidence that something is happening.

Bari Jo

[Roll]

So, some good news even though it's kind of silly and unscientific.  I was looking at another person's thread and they posted a pict from how-old.net and it showed female.  So I decided to test my picture and it came up as female.  So then I backtracked picture by picture to find the picture that the software starts to identify me as female.  It looks like it started happening Dec 3.  I personally still see the boy in every mirror and picture, but gives me a little confidence that something is happening.

Bari Jo

Okay, so... I just tried how-old.net, and I have to say. I'm a little impressed. It pegged my guy pictures almost perfectly (was always about a year on either side, male). Which made me happy when it was pegging my other pictures as female, but around 25-29! Well, except for one blonde photo. That said I was 7. Not sure what the deal is there.

[Michelle_P]

That's uncanny.  it pegged the male selfie at 65 (I was 62), and my recent selfies at 38-42.  I'm 64.   

Wow.  It must be the new highlighter...


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[steph2.0]

That's uncanny.  it pegged the male selfie at 65 (I was 62), and my recent selfies at 38-42.  I'm 64.   

Wow.  It must be the new highlighter...

I should not have gone there. 80% of them are coming back male. Sigh.

[KathyLauren]

Well, that's interesting.  It gets my gender right, but is not particularly close on the age.

Age  Presentation  Result
59      male        46 male
62      male        47 male
63      female     42 female
63      female      45 female

I guess I'm happy about that,  It least the error is in the right direction.

[TonyaW]

That's uncanny.  it pegged the male selfie at 65 (I was 62), and my recent selfies at 38-42.  I'm 64.   

Wow.  It must be the new highlighter...


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Maybe they are just nicer to the females?

My 10 years ago male pic got tagged male age 76.  My one month ago got female 29. 
That's younger than my kids. 

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[Julia1996]

So, some good news even though it's kind of silly and unscientific.  I was looking at another person's thread and they posted a pict from how-old.net and it showed female.  So I decided to test my picture and it came up as female.  So then I backtracked picture by picture to find the picture that the software starts to identify me as female.  It looks like it started happening Dec 3.  I personally still see the boy in every mirror and picture, but gives me a little confidence that something is happening.

Bari Jo

That site is cool. It got my age right as well as my boyfriend and brother. It didn't get my dad's age right though. It pegged him for 35. Lol. He will totally love that.