Jessica's Rose Garden

[Donica]

Great news Jessica! Off to a good start for sure.

Hugs,
Donica.

[Jessica_Rose]

We had a communication meeting at work today, isn't that what meetings are for? After the meeting someone I had never met came over and started a conversation. He had seen me around but did not know my name. Sometimes that question still catches me off guard, and I hesitated a split second before I remembered it. we talked about our roles for about 15 minutes. It was nice talking to a co-worker who did not know my background for once, and I did not spoil it by telling him.

I scheduled an appointment with my doctor for the morning of 16 Jan to get my pre-op surgery clearance, along with an EKG. My first ever mammogram is scheduled that same afternoon. I hope they will take it easy on the girls, after all they are young and inexperienced!

I found this dress over the weekend and had to get it. I wore this to work and was smiling all day!

[Rayna]

Great dress, and you look lovely in it! I'm glad you can work in that.

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[Laurie]

Nice dress Jessica and loved the update regarding the coworker. What affirmation for you. I hope all goes well at the doc's and the girl do not get a crush from the fondling.

Hugs,
  Laurie

[Jennifer M]

Wow, that is a great outfit! Something I could envision wearing.

[davina61]

And me, need to change my job so I can DRESS  for work!!!

[Jessica_Rose]

Working in IT we have a wide latitude in what we wear. Our dress code basically says 'wear whatever you want', and as long as no one complains you are good! Early on my manager did mention someone had commented about a dress or skirt I wore that was a bit short. The next day I wore a short dress (about four inches above my knees) which I thought would be OK. My manager agreed that would be fine, so now I know what is acceptable in my work area. Although that length may seem short, I'm 6' 1" so that is actually a modest length for me. I think the only other restriction is basically no spaghetti straps. I do tend to dress nicer than the cis women there, and maybe one day they will take the hint and join me in celebrating how awesome it is to be a woman!!!

By the way, my wife joined Susan's Place today! It may be a day or two before she makes an intro post, but once she gets comfortable I expect she will be a frequent poster. She will be easy to spot, her user name is 'Susan_Rose'.

[Northern Star Girl]

Snippd:

- - - - - - -
    - - - - - -
By the way, my wife joined Susan's Place today! It may be a day or two before she makes an intro post, but once she gets comfortable I expect she will be a frequent poster. She will be easy to spot, her user name is 'Susan_Rose'.

@Jessica_Rose
Dear Jessica:
Be warned, your wife has just arrived, I just greeted her on the Introductions Forums....   
...I spoke very highly of you so you need to be on your best behavior!!!!
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

[Jessica_Rose]

Snippd:
@Jessica_Rose
Dear Jessica:
Be warned, your wife has just arrived, I just greeted her on the Introductions Forums....   
...I spoke very highly of you so you need to be on your best behavior!!!!
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

Thanks for the warning! No worries. I know there are not a lot of significant others on the forums, and those whose marriage survived are rare. I hope her experience may be able to help some of them get through this stage of their lives.

I told her to be herself, and to feel free to tell the truth about the sometimes horrible person I used to be. I won't take it personally, because I am not that person anymore. I can remember some of what he did, but I know my anger blinded me to quite a bit of it. Who knows, I may even learn something from her! Love always -- Jessica Rose

[Jessica]

Thanks for the warning! No worries. I know there are not a lot of significant others on the forums, and those whose marriage survived are rare. I hope her experience may be able to help some of them get through this stage of their lives.

I told her to be herself, and to feel free to tell the truth about the sometimes horrible person I used to be. I won't take it personally, because I am not that person anymore. I can remember some of what he did, but I know my anger blinded me to quite a bit of it. Who knows, I may even learn something from her! Love always -- Jessica Rose

Jessica, she seems like a wonderful person and I'm looking forward for her insights.  She has and is going through what my wife is at this moment.

Hugs and smiles from a California girl

[Laurie]

I hope I made Susan laugh.

[Jessica_Rose]

Yes Laurie, you did make Susan laugh! Your post occurred after we went to bed, and I didn't see Susan again until after I got home from work. She giggled when I asked her about it.

I visited my favorite Ross store again today and got another hug from my new friend Deva. I found a few dresses to try on and came out of the dressing room so she could see them. One dress had a black and silver metallic top with a black skirt and it fit VERY well (actually a bit too snug). When I went out to show Deva I noticed a 30-something guy looking at me as I modeled the dress. Yep, I knew that look. I used to give it to good looking women too! I couldn't help but smile. Of course now I reserve 'the look' exclusively for Susan!!

[Jessica_Rose]

Susan came into my office this morning and asked if I would like a different wall clock. I thought it was an odd question, but then I thought a bit more. I received it as a gift when I left the military. The clock is about 14 inches across, it is made from an old IBM 3380 disk platter and has my rank and dead name engraved on it. Susan knows how much my dead name bothers me, and I just thought how amazing it was that she suggested I replace it. I think I'll take her up on the suggestion.

[Donica]

That's wonderful Jessica. It is heart warming to know Susan is thinking of you. I think this calls for a special night out to her favorite place.

Hugs,
Donica.

[KathyLauren]

What a thoughful gesture!

[LizK]

Susan came into my office this morning and asked if I would like a different wall clock. I thought it was an odd question, but then I thought a bit more. I received it as a gift when I left the military. The clock is about 14 inches across, it is made from an old IBM 3380 disk platter and has my rank and dead name engraved on it. Susan knows how much my dead name bothers me, and I just thought how amazing it was that she suggested I replace it. I think I'll take her up on the suggestion.

What a lovely thoughtful thing to do...[emoji3]

Liz


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[Jessica_Rose]

My electrologist did another 'south pole' clearing today, it took about 65 minutes. She has not found any thick hairs in over a month, so we are making good progress. Today wasn't as uncomfortable as the first few sessions -- maybe I'm getting used to it. Only 143 days until 'V-Day'.

I have felt a bit 'off' the last few days. Today I finally figured it out -- everything feels normal. Not just for a few minutes at a time, but all the time. No worries about whether or not Susan will stay with me, no constant concern about passing, no longer caring about what other people may think, and no hiding who I am. I have become comfortable with myself and the world around me (such as it is). Although I expect I will have moments when I lapse into 'worry' mode at times I feel as though my life is now, and maybe for the first time ever, normal.

[Michelle_P]

... Today I finally figured it out -- everything feels normal. Not just for a few minutes at a time, but all the time. No worries about whether or not Susan will stay with me, no constant concern about passing, no longer caring about what other people may think, and no hiding who I am. I have become comfortable with myself and the world around me (such as it is).
...

Isn't that a great feeling, realizing that new 'normal'?  Jessica, this is a great thing, our authentic life as ourselves just becoming... our life.  It's a tremendous point of closure, and at the same time the start of a whole new phase of our lives, just being ourselves!

Congratulations on achieving the 'new normal' for your life!

[Jessica_Rose]

I just had an IM session with the Communications Coordinator for our LGBT+ group at work. They are going to send out a note on 20 Nov for the Transgender Day of Remembrance. He wanted to know if it was OK to include a link to my bio and my video from our National Coming Out Day event. I told him that it would be an honor for me to be a part of it.

This is the bio I submitted for the NCOD event:
I have been married 34 years and have two daughters. After serving 12 years in the military and working at a few other companies, I landed at this company. I have been here over 12 years and have been working out of Colorado Springs as part of the Db2 Engineering Team almost the entire time.

Coming out is a pivotal moment in our lives. It not only affects us, but also those around us. Too many people live in fear of others discovering their secret, and that fear often pushes them away from their friends and family -- the very people who could be their biggest allies. Recent studies show over 40% of those who identify as transgender attempt suicide. I was almost part of that statistic. I hope sharing my story will help others find the strength to climb out of the darkness. Coming out is frightening for many of us, but it opens the door to a world where we don't have to hide, one where we can finally be ourselves. There is no greater joy in life than living openly as the person you were meant to be.

"Be who you were created to be, and you will set the world on fire." – St. Catherine of Sienna

...and a link to the video thread
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,241752.msg2186579.html#msg2186579

[Donica]

A lovely post Jessica. Congratulations and thank you.

Hugs,
Donica.