Jessica's Rose Garden

[Jessica_Rose]

One more thought for today... It was two years ago tonight that I discovered who I was. Reading story after story on Susan's Place, continually thinking 'I could have written that!', finally triggered an epiphany. It has been an amazing journey, one which I originally thought would be impossible. But others had done it, so I knew I could do it as well. I have another big step planned this year, then hopefully my life can get back to a new normal. My thanks to everyone who helped me on this journey. Without your help, there is a good chance I would not be alive right now.

[Donica]

I don't know if I was of any help to you Jessica, but I'm proud to know you and I'm glad you are still hear. You have certainly been an inspiration to many of us here. Thank you for sharing your life.

Love,
Donica.

[Northern Star Girl]

One more thought for today... It was two years ago tonight that I discovered who I was. Reading story after story on Susan's Place, continually thinking 'I could have written that!', finally triggered an epiphany. It has been an amazing journey, one which I originally thought would be impossible. But others had done it, so I knew I could do it as well. I have another big step planned this year, then hopefully my life can get back to a new normal. My thanks to everyone who helped me on this journey. Without your help, there is a good chance I would not be alive right now.

@Jessica_Rose
Dear Jessica:
This last year I have followed your thread with great interest and have felt JOY for you in your successful moments that you share with all of us.   
Your pictures have shown us your amazing progress and wonderful results in your transformation journey... truly an inspiration to others that are "watching" and "reading" your story.

I am so very happy that you have been able to formulate an accepting relationship with your wife... achieving acceptance from a spouse or partner can be one of the biggest obstacles in transition.... you can count yourself very fortunate in that regard.

I trust that you and your loved ones had a very Merry Christmas and now
will have a Happy and Prosperous NEW YEAR in 2019.

Hugs and continued well wishes...
Danielle

[Jessica_Rose]

Donica, I read everyone's comments! On occasion someone brings up something I had not thought about, or maybe a different viewpoint. I thank all of you for helping me.

Danielle, seeing your comments on this thread always brightens my day. There are times I wonder if anyone is learning anything from my journal. Sometimes several days pass between comments from other members, but the 'read' counter seems to go up every day, so I will keep it going as long as it appears to be useful.

Last night Susan and I watched 'Different for Girls'. We had never watched a movie about a transgender relationship before. There were several scenes which made us laugh, and a few which were very poignant to me. The final 10 - 15 minutes had an impact. It made me think about the part of me which Susan will be losing, and how I may one day long for the same thing that I am taking away from her. I expect our relationship will continue to change as we navigate this new world.

I am somewhat anxious right now. Our next therapist appointment in on 3 January, and I should find out then when my therapist will send the GCS referral letters to Dr. Ley. She has told me on more than one occasion that she will take care of them, but until that step is complete I can't really make plans. One person holds the key to my future right now, and in two days I will know when she will open the door.

[Donica]

Wishing you both a joyous New Year Jessica and Susan! I hope you both find the strength to continue your journey together. I'm looking forward to following your thread for another wonderful year of happiness and success.

Happy New Year girl!
Donica.

[ChrissyRyan]

Jessica and Susan,


Happy New Year!   

Chrissy

[davina61]

I think the same with my posts but as you say the counter climbs, I know I do a lot of lurking. Happy new year dear, may all your wishes come true.XXXXXX

[Jessica_Rose]

My therapist said she would write the 'first' GCS referral letter on Monday (7 Jan), and she gave me the names of two other therapists she has worked with who could write the 'second' letter. Hopefully I can get in to see them next week!

My therapist has worked with Dr. Ley's office previously, so I should be in good shape.

[GordonG]

My therapist said she would write the 'first' GCS referral letter on Monday (7 Jan), and she gave me the names of two other therapists she has worked with who could write the 'second' letter. Hopefully I can get in to see them next week!

My therapist has worked with Dr. Ley's office previously, so I should be in good shape.

Good for you. Congratulations.

[Jessica_Rose]

I heard from one of the therapists who can do the second referral letter, and she said she would set me up for her earliest appointment -- I just don't know when that will be. Hopefully I will find out soon.

Not something you typically hear, but I had fun with my electrologist today. I had another 1.5hr session which I expected would be for south pole and chest work, but the entire session was spent at the south pole. All the big hairs are gone, so she was trying to find the thin, small ones. In order to see things better and improve her access we tried several different positions. She made me promise not to be specific, so I will keep my descriptions a little vague.

The first new position would have been appropriate on gynecological exam table (which I will hopefully become more familiar with).

The next position would have been easier if we had an S&M restraint system with pulleys.

The final position really allowed her to get up close and personal. I can safely say it was a position I never expected to be in, ever, but on a positive note now I know what a pretzel must feel like!

[GordonG]

... the entire session was spent at the south pole. All the big hairs are gone, so she was trying to find the thin, small ones. In order to see things better and improve her access we tried several different positions. She made me promise not to be specific, so I will keep my descriptions a little vague.

Jessica
I'm wondering how you deal with the pain. I've been going to an electrologist for a few years now getting my ears done then went for my torso and back. I hate body hair. My electrologist will not touch the genital area, but is willing to go as low as I can lower my underwear without "exposure". When down there within a inch or so of the goods, I can only stand it for a few minutes.

[Jessica_Rose]

The most painful hair my electrologist ever zapped was on my ear. Usually the pain fades in seconds, but this one was still painful five hours later!

For my normal sessions I take ibuprofen about an hour before, but for my south pole sessions I have been cheating a bit. I have some prescription pain killer left over from an abscessed tooth last year and have been taking one of those about an hour before each session. I am almost out now, but I think I can get by without it at this point. It does not seem to be as painful as when I started, maybe I have just gotten used to it. I do have a reasonably high tolerance for pain, and I have been known to fall asleep while she was working on my face and neck.

Most areas around the south pole are not really that painful to me. The worst areas are the tendon on the inside of my thigh, the seam down the middle of my scrotum, and on the shaft. I am having more areas cleared than those required for GCS because like you, I hate body hair.

Initially my electrologist would not work in the netherlands either, but it was because her husband was against it. I met him twice, once before and once after I transitioned. A few weeks after our second meeting he told his wife that she could work on my south pole, and then a few weeks later gave her the OK to work there for anyone who requested it. Luckily Mr. Happy has been behaving, but I expect he doesn't realize what his future holds.

[GordonG]

The most painful hair my electrologist ever zapped was on my ear. Usually the pain fades in seconds, but this one was still painful five hours later!

For my normal sessions I take ibuprofen about an hour before, but for my south pole sessions I have been cheating a bit. I have some prescription pain killer left over from an abscessed tooth last year and have been taking one of those about an hour before each session. I am almost out now, but I think I can get by without it at this point. It does not seem to be as painful as when I started, maybe I have just gotten used to it. I do have a reasonably high tolerance for pain, and I have been known to fall asleep while she was working on my face and neck.

Most areas around the south pole are not really that painful to me. The worst areas are the tendon on the inside of my thigh, the seam down the middle of my scrotum, and on the shaft. I am having more areas cleared than those required for GCS because like you, I hate body hair.

Initially my electrologist would not work in the netherlands either, but it was because her husband was against it. I met him twice, once before and once after I transitioned. A few weeks after our second meeting he told his wife that she could work on my south pole, and then a few weeks later gave her the OK to work there for anyone who requested it. Luckily Mr. Happy has been behaving, but I expect he doesn't realize what his future holds.

Your last sentence gave me a chuckle.

Yes indeed you must have a high pain threshold. I too have been using left over pain medication from rotator cuff surgery a year and a half ago. But even with that, when she goes south it hurts.  And falling asleep, thats never going to happen. I've been going for 2 hour sessions every 6 to 8 weeks. I'm starting to see the end of the road.

[Donica]

Just this year Kaiser changed their policy requiring 1 year RLE before approving hair removal at the south pole. I have about 6 months to go. On top of that, my electrolysis says it may take a year to remove all the hair from the Netherlands. I could do 4 hour session every week and have it done in 6 months but if it's as painful as upper lip hair removal? She's going to have to scrap my off the ceiling, or at least tie me down, give me something to bite down on and a pillow to scream into. Because of that, I don't think I'll have any problems Mr. Happy lol.

[Jessica_Rose]

My insurance does not cover electrolysis. Luckily the electrologist I found (CJ) only charges $35 per hour (I pay her $40 because I want to). Jan 31 will mark our two year anniversary. Until early August 2018 I had been having one hour sessions twice a week, in August I upped it to three hours each week. When CJ moved her office to be closer to home, which was further from my work, we changed to two 1.5 hour sessions, usually Monday and Tuesday. When I started seeing her she mentioned a plan to retire in about two years, but I told her she could not retire until she was done with me! She has developed some health issues and has stopped taking new clients, but she told me that she will get me to my GCS date. She has become one of my best friends. How can you possibly have secrets from someone who is doing electrolysis at the south pole?!!! Although she has many transgender clients, I will be the first one she has ever taken from pre-HRT through GCS. I honestly don't know how I could have done this without her.

South pole electrolysis is not that bad, except for a few places. The seam down the middle of the scrotum is roughly equivalent to upper lip, but the sensitive area is only about a half inch wide. The shaft is also uncomfortable, but a little less than the seam. Most of the remaining area is not much different from your cheeks from the standpoint of discomfort. The absolute worst pain I have felt with hair removal is laser. There are some areas on the back and sides of my thighs that take my breath away. One of these days I expect to destroy the 'stress balls' they give me during the treatment. Ever get shot with a 'red ryder' BB gun? Most of the laser pulses feel like that, but the sensitive areas are indescribable. Once I counted the laser pulses for one leg, then doubled the number to estimate the count for both -- 2800! Face it, it take a tough man to become a woman.

When put in context, the discomfort of electrolysis is insignificant when compared to the pain we have struggled with all of our lives. I am the first client CJ has ever had 1.5 hour session with. She said she does not understand how I can put up with the pain -- I put up with it because I must. I have a goal, and this is the only way I can reach it. You can do it too.

[ChrissyRyan]

Jessica,


Does your skin turn red or black after these painful sessions?

Chrissy

[Jessica_Rose]

Redness is normal for both laser and electrolysis, but the recovery time is not the same.

For laser, the size of the red spots depend on the aperture of the laser. In my case each pulse covers about the area of a nickel. The redness usually fades after 3 - 5 hours. Be careful to avoid sun exposure, exercise, and hot showers for about 48 hours or you can develop 'hyperpigmentation'. Basically the treated areas will turn darker and you will appear to have a spotted suntan, but it takes months for it to fade (the voice of experience).

After over 200 hours of electrolysis I have only had dark spots appear 4 - 5 times. It looks like a small bruise, and it will fade after a few days. You may also notice redness where each hair was treated. It usually fades within an hour or two, but some areas take longer to recover. My chest and south pole usually take 3 - 5 days to fully recover, but there is no lingering pain or discomfort.   

[ChrissyRyan]

Jessica,


Do you use any painkillers just before or during the hair removal process?

Chrissy

[sarah1972]

Ugh - the fun of electrolysis and laser. I am on it for a little over a year now. First 6 months was only facial laser to remove all dark hair, and since electrolysis to get rid of the white hairs. After 8 months I was brave enough to ask about "down under" and I have done 3 laser session so far.

I am very lucky, so far I am only 20 hours in on my face and I do expect another 10 before it will be maintenance mode. Face will take a backseat in the next couple of months...

Electrolysis below will start next week with multiple sessions per week since I have to be mostly done end of March. Lucky my surgeon only recommends but does not require hair removal, so whatever I cannot get done till then will be taken care of during surgery.

With so many sessions, we become friends. Most of our sessions by now are lovely girl talk, gossiping about her suitors or other topics. She is in business for over 25 years and has also had trans clients before.

For the bottom area I did negotiate a flat fee and for the face I buy blocks of 15 sessions at a reduced price.

You are right Jessica, the pain is short lived and certainly beats the emotional pain of having to shave and have stubbles peaking through makeup at the end of a day.

I do use numbing cream before the sessions to better deal with it, but sometimes even that does not help. She also has a gift for going outside of numbed areas...

Hugs

My insurance does not cover electrolysis. Luckily the electrologist I found (CJ) only charges $35 per hour (I pay her $40 because I want to). Jan 31 will mark our two year anniversary. Until early August 2018 I had been having one hour sessions twice a week, in August I upped it to three hours each week. When CJ moved her office to be closer to home, which was further from my work, we changed to two 1.5 hour sessions, usually Monday and Tuesday. When I started seeing her she mentioned a plan to retire in about two years, but I told her she could not retire until she was done with me! She has developed some health issues and has stopped taking new clients, but she told me that she will get me to my GCS date. She has become one of my best friends. How can you possibly have secrets from someone who is doing electrolysis at the south pole?!!! Although she has many transgender clients, I will be the first one she has ever taken from pre-HRT through GCS. I honestly don't know how I could have done this without her.

South pole electrolysis is not that bad, except for a few places. The seam down the middle of the scrotum is roughly equivalent to upper lip, but the sensitive area is only about a half inch wide. The shaft is also uncomfortable, but a little less than the seam. Most of the remaining area is not much different from your cheeks from the standpoint of discomfort. The absolute worst pain I have felt with hair removal is laser. There are some areas on the back and sides of my thighs that take my breath away. One of these days I expect to destroy the 'stress balls' they give me during the treatment. Ever get shot with a 'red ryder' BB gun? Most of the laser pulses feel like that, but the sensitive areas are indescribable. Once I counted the laser pulses for one leg, then doubled the number to estimate the count for both -- 2800! Face it, it take a tough man to become a woman.

When put in context, the discomfort of electrolysis is insignificant when compared to the pain we have struggled with all of our lives. I am the first client CJ has ever had 1.5 hour session with. She said she does not understand how I can put up with the pain -- I put up with it because I must. I have a goal, and this is the only way I can reach it. You can do it too.

[Jessica_Rose]

Do you use any painkillers just before or during the hair removal process?

Chrissy

I normally take ibuprofen an hour before either a laser or electrolysis session. The laser folks also gave me a prescription for 'BLT' cream, benzocaine, lidocaine, and tetracaine. I use that prior to facial laser treatments, but it still hurts like hell. I have some Vicodin left over from an abscessed tooth last year, and that helps for south pole electrolysis, but it does nothing to help the discomfort of laser.

Sarah, you were indeed much luckier than I was with facial hair! After about 200 hours of electrolysis my face is now close to 'maintenance mode'. I have not shaved for eight days, and there are only a few visible hairs. I will just use a beard trimmer to keep them short so they can be treated at my next session.